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NO. 3 TERRORIST ACTUALLY NO. 9, BIN LADEN SAYS

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kliljedahl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:29 PM
Original message
NO. 3 TERRORIST ACTUALLY NO. 9, BIN LADEN SAYS
Borowitz from yesterday:

Madman Unveils Organizational Chart in Latest Terror Tape


In a new terror tape broadcast today, al-Qaeda mastermind Osama bin Laden dismissed the importance of an al-Qaeda terrorist currently in U.S. custody, claiming that the terrorist, Abu Faraj al-Libbi, was not the No. 3 man in al-Qaeda but was actually only No. 9.

Mr. bin Laden took to the airwaves of the Arabic-language al-Jazeera network to downplay Mr. al-Libbi’s capture, saying that the terrorist had been demoted from No. 3 to No. 9 last autumn and that his role in the international terror group was “largely administrative.”

Using a PowerPoint presentation of al-Qaeda’s organizational chart, the world’s most wanted man offered viewers a rare glimpse into the structure of the highly secretive terror network.

According to the chart, Mr. al-Libbi had no terrorists of any consequence reporting to him and had been given the somewhat nebulous title of “community liaison.”

Link: http://www.borowitzreport.com/archive_rpt.asp?rec=1159&srch=


Keith’s Barbeque Central
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OldLeftieLawyer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:31 PM
Response to Original message
1. My theory about #3
We've caught the "number 3 man in Al Qaeda" three times now, so 3x3 is 9, and that's why the confusion.

Soon, I'm sure we'll catch the "number 2" man for the seventh time, and that will mean we've also taken out the "number 14th" man in the organization.

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hippiechick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:32 PM
Response to Original message
2. He's fucking with George's Terra-Deck ..
Mock the Chimp
Mock the Chimp
Mock the Chimp
Mock the Chimp

I love it. :evilgrin:
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:32 PM
Response to Original message
3. VERY, VERY FUNNY! Great Find! Kick and Nod!
Edited on Fri Jun-24-05 01:35 PM by DistressedAmerican
I love Borowitz! Hysterical and on the right (left) side of the fence!

Who the hell knew that terrorists got demotions?
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GiovanniC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:33 PM
Response to Original message
4. "Community Liason"
Too funny.
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ThomWV Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:35 PM
Response to Original message
5. What? A Fuggin' Organizational Chart?
You're kidding, right?

Little boxes with guys names in them, and titles too it seems. Little lines of authority and reporting. Dotted lines here and there for god, or Allah, only knows what reason.

You're kidding, right?
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Up2Late Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:48 PM
Response to Original message
6. You do know that Andy Borowitz is a Comedy Writer, right?
Here is some of what you get when you google "Andy Borowitz"

Andy Borowitz: Condi Offers to Give France Michael Moore
By: Andy Borowitz Published: Feb 14, 2005, Email this article ... Andy Borowitz writes a daily humor column at www.borowitzreport.com and is the author of a ...
yubanet.com/artman/publish/article_18015.shtml - 20k - Cached - Similar pages
< More results from yubanet.com >

Andy Borowitz
JWR Contributor Andy Borowitz, the first-ever recipient of the National Press Club's Award for Humor, is a former president of the Harvard Lampoon,and a ...
www.jewishworldreview.com/0305/borowitz031005.php3 - 21k - Cached - Similar pages


I hate to be a "Wet Blanket", but for those who don't know who Andy Borowitz is, a disclaimer that is a Humor/Satire site should be included to avoid confusion.
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kliljedahl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:52 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. I know that, that's why I posted it
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. Folks That Are Too Slow To Recognize Satire Deserve To Be Confused!
We are a humorless society on the whole. People should get a sense of humor!
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Up2Late Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 02:05 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. You'd be surprised how often I hear this sort of thing repeated...
...on Call in shows, and then the Host, having never heard this "fact," doesn't discredit it, which then begins the "echo chamber" effect. I've even seen it happen here too.
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 02:07 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. I Just Think We Shouldn't Dumb Down Good Satire To Prevent Confusion.
Satire is and always has been confusing to some. It is a shame that some folks can't read the humor in that is intrinsically there. It has always been and will continue!

Although in general I agree that the echo chamber gets riled by such things.
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 05:45 PM
Response to Original message
11. Giving This The Official "Yes, People It Is Satire" Kicker!
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dogday Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 05:46 PM
Response to Original message
12. Polls are low, People not supporting Iraq, Time
to pull out Bin Laden folks, get the popcorn...
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Vickers Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 05:49 PM
Response to Original message
13. Number 9 man? You mean, we caught their Secretary of Agriculture?
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

That writer is hilarious.
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Gloria Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jun-24-05 05:58 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. So, where is #6 (Patrick McGoohan) on the Al Qaeda list??
eom
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