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Oh The Lies I Could Have Gotten Away With If My Parents Were Freeptards!

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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:04 PM
Original message
Oh The Lies I Could Have Gotten Away With If My Parents Were Freeptards!
The longer I watch this spectacle unfold, the more amazed I am at the kind of lies Bush supporters find credible! It is literally stupefying to me!

These mindless drones are willing to believe anything as long as it does not imply that their hero is anything less than virtuous!

I just wish I had been raised by one of these folks. I could have had a ball as a kid!!!

=====================================================================

They walk in and find me with my hand right there in the cookie jar.
My response, "I was just rearranging the cookies to make them more space efficient."

I get busted sneaking out of the house at night.
My response, "I wanted to be early for church!"

I am caught stealing money out of my mother's purse.
My response, "I needed it to tithe. I do not have a job. but, God still needs his share."

Porn under my bed.
Response, "I was researching the porn industry in an attempt to undermine their terrible influence on kids. Won't SOMEONE think of the children!"

Caught beating a weak neighbor kid up and taking his lunch money.
Response, "I was liberating him. Liberating him GOOD!"
=====================================================================

Mindless drones can never be trusted to decide what is or is not true. Their meter is completely out of wack!

What could you have gotten away with:shrug:?





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Sanity Claws Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:10 PM
Response to Original message
1. Not much
My sense of Freeptard parents is that they are very strict and would beat their child if he/she disobeyed. They expect complete obedience at all times.
Remember how Bolton was described - a kiss up, kick down kind of guy. Well, children are kick down, in the Freeptard world.
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:19 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. You Have A Very Good Point.
I was just referring to their gullibility. I know that you most likely realize that and are just making a completely valid side argument.

Besides what strict freeptard parent can have a problem with me being early for church?

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Ladyhawk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:13 PM
Response to Original message
2. It only works if they think you are a paragon of virtue chosen by GOD.
I know. I've been there.
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:27 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. YOU Are A Paragon Of Virtue! If I Believed In God, I'd Assume
you were chosen by him/her!

You can do whatever you want while you are living under my roof!

I have a spare bedroom!
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Ladyhawk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:31 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. Damn...I may need it someday. :) n/t
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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:34 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. You Just Pm Me When The Day Comes! I'll Keep The Light On For You!
:pals:
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Niche Donating Member (687 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:15 PM
Response to Original message
3. "Honestly, mom I'm still a virgin... am too! He put it my mouth...
maybe my bum... that's not sex! I'm keepin' the SILVER RING and I'm wearin' WHITE at my wedding!" x(

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DistressedAmerican Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-05-05 07:29 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. LOL!!! Sadly The Stats On Abstinence Ed Support Your Example.
Bill Maher was talking about it one night and was pissed that he missed the "porn star quality sex" be not taking an abstinence pledge! It was hysterical!:rofl:
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