I've found a perfect bed for my children: The Quantum Sleeper.

[Goldmund]

http://www.qsleeper.com/

[The Doctor.]

1. "This is 911...."

"There's a burglar holed up in my Quantum Sleeper... he's taunting us from the inside!"

[Goldmund]

2. A metaphysical question here...

So say there's a biochemical attack and you're stuck in your Quantum sleeper breathing your safe oxygen.

Where do you, um, go to the bathroom?

[Fridays Child]

5. It has a "toiletry system" but it needs intravenous Valium...

...for claustrophobics.

[dave29]

3. aka Schroedinger's Sleeper

Are they alive, or dead, or just asleep?

[Goldmund]

4. You will remain uncertain,

because if you get close enough to my children, they will be moved. If you are far enough to be permitted, you won't be able to tell.

[SmokingJacket]

8. Now that's funny! nt

[damntexdem]

6. Does it work using

quantum mechanics?

[Goldmund]

7. Of course.

Every single particle it's made of "uses" quantum mechanics.

[SmokingJacket]

9. What about chainsaws??

What if a bad guy came after me with a chain saw, or an axe??

Sounds like a great horror movie: trapped in bed while a killer goes after you with a power drill!

Notice that it comes with built-in tinfoil hat...
:tinfoilhat:

[Goldmund]

12. Glad you asked.

I've engineered a system which emits large quantities of mustard gas into the kid's room as soon as the Quantum Sleeper closes and locks. The kids breath the oxygen supply from the Quantum Sleeper, and any chainsaw murderer would be instantly dead upon walking into the room.

As you can see, I keep my children as safe as I can, while still affording them the chance of having a decent childhood (I installed both a Gameboy and a CleanTV in there). I'm a good parent.

[KittyWampus]

10. What I Wanna Know Is How Opening Poster FOUND This Oddity

amazing find.

[Goldmund]

13. I found the brochure...

...in a department store, right between bicycle helmets and sunscreen. :evilgrin:

Actually, to tell you the truth, I don't remember how I found it. I think it may have been posted on DU a few years ago.

[frylock]

11. wouldn't it be easier to strap em to a murphy bed..

and hole them up in a wall for the night?

[Goldmund]

18. I like the way you think

The little buggers may wiggle themselves free of their safety, though.

[Horse with no Name]

14. Man thank God they didn't have these in the 30's

or else Dorothy and Toto would have never left Kansas!

[KittyWampus]

15. Maybe With The Sensory Deprivation They Woulda HALLUCINATED

their way out of Kansas.


:D

[Horse with no Name]

16. Seriously though

It's not legal to lock your child in a closet--why would it be legal to lock your child in a bed?
This is wayyyyyyyyy over the top.

[Goldmund]

17. LOL Sorry I can't really take it "seriously though"

:D

So anyway, yeah, I'm not sure that it's legal, but the $50,000 price includes potential lawyer fees.