Breaking News... Canadians Admit Shutdown of America

[caribmon]

August 18, 2003
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada

Prime Minister Jean Chretien of Canada revealed today in a stunning press conference that Canada was at fault for shutting off power to more than 50 million people across the Eastern Seaboard and parts of Canada yesterday.

"Well, we juz gat zick of all dat whining and the faact dat dem bloody Mericans are vucking us over on softwood wood and other NAFTA sheet," said Chretien, out of the side of his mouth. "So since we control dem... all dat power, dat dey all need, we just shut it all down," he added with a hint of glee in his voice. "Now dey know what its like in Iraq!"

The Canadian Prime Minister also pointed out that the current American government was starting to retaliate against its northern neighbours due to the fact that Canada was opting out on the war on Iraq, just like Mexico.

Chretien originally blamed it on some fluke lightning strike just over the US border in Niagara Falls but NOAA charts showed blue skies over the area during the time of dispute. So he changed his tune.

"Well, what de heck," stated the leader. "Now oui know who controls who," he added, with obvious reference to the huge dams and electric facilities that feed the Eastern Seaboard from Northern Quebec.

The Canadian Prime Minister went on to add that Bush's latest attempts at trade retaliation were directly related to fact that gays can now get married in Canada and the legalization of very good weed in the great country to the north.

"So oui smoke a leetle pot and lets gay peeples gets married," stated Chretien. "And we doesn't spend enough on bombs for de' bomb builders in da' USA, dis little talkin' chimp dangling from his merry post wit da' strings held by Cheney tinks we are bad peeples?"

Chretien went on to subtly add.

"And if dat little pretzel bashed, english mangling, (he speaks dee damnnn language worster than I), PNAC posta' boy, wants to blame de Canadians... He better know when ta' trow his gloves down," added the former Montreal Canadians hockey player now prime minister.

<SNIP>

http://www.ifyouclickonthislinkyouareadumbassrepublican.com

[CanuckAmok]

1. Oh, jeez, the Mericuns are on to us, eh!

//Better high tail it back to the Lorne Greene School of Broadcasting/Canadian Intelligence Front, to regroup!

[Name removed]

2. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[robbedvoter]

4. The link seems to be part of the jole, the content, poster's

writing (I think)

[Pocho]

3. DEBEMOS MANDAR MAS MEXICANOS NORTE A LAS ESTADOSUNIDOS

para enseñar todos de alla nuestra concepto de "ni modo". Van a necesitarlo para vivir comfortable en esta mundo que han creido.

[caribmon]

5. What.... Can't take a joke?

Click on the link mod.

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

6. Next up:

Canajuns send us lots of Poutine, and we all eat it and become fat and unable to protect The Vaterland.