Osama's Shipping Peril

[CHIMO]

Meanwhile, the never-ending post-war flow of American casualties from Iraq is taxing the ceremonial capacity of the U.S. military. With only 500 buglers on staff, but 1,800 veterans dying each day (anyone with an honourable discharge is entitled to a military funeral), the Pentagon has resorted to what it calls "ceremonial bugles." People pretend to blow into a special bugle while they turn on a hidden digital musical device. The sound is, according to the armed forces, a "high-quality rendition of taps." That's a shortcut I find beyond comment.


On a more cheerful note, Carl Djerassi, the Vienna-born chemistry professor from Stanford University who synthesized the first oral contraceptive 52 years ago, now believes it is about to become obsolete. During a recent lecture at Cambridge University, he predicted that in vitro fertilization will replace lust (but not love) as a means of procreation. "Let's face it," he told his stunned audience, "deep friendship and companionship is likely to last a hell of a lot longer than a relationship based mainly on screwing." (Why did my professors never explain that to me?) At any rate, what the good doctor suggests is that making love is about to officially become a recreational activity. You read it here first.


With an American presidential election around the corner, the secret which the Bush people are most anxious to protect is that, win or lose, the U.S. must reimpose the military draft, abandoned in 1973. There simply aren't enough eligible recruits volunteering to maintain the Iraqi contingent, plus America's other growing foreign obligations. Republican Senator James Inhofe from Oklahoma, who serves on the powerful Senate Armed Service Committee, came flat out for the idea of making young people do compulsory military service. "There are huge social benefits that come from it," the senator said. "When I look at the problems of some of our kids in America nowadays, and then I go visit the troops, I see what a great benefit it is to give people the opportunity to serve their country."


http://www.macleans.ca/switchboard/columnists/article.jsp?content=20040119_73479_73479

"As a result of our interaction with the U.S. Embassy , a letter was sent from the director, Joint Chiefs of Staff, in Washington to the vice-chiefs of the U.S. military services, reminding them that their recruiters are to refrain from entering Canadian territory,"


Is Diefenbaker still around?