A Last Bastion of Civility, the South, Sees Manners Decline

[alp227]

One August night, two men walked into a popular restaurant attached to this city’s fanciest shopping mall. They sat at the bar, ordered drinks and pondered the menu. Two women stood behind them.

A bartender asked if they would they mind offering their seats to the ladies. Yes, they would mind. Very much.

Angry words came next, then a federal court date and a claim for more than $3 million in damages.

The men, a former professional basketball player and a lawyer, also happen to be African-American. The women are white. The men’s lawyers argued that the Tavern at Phipps used a policy wrapped in chivalry as a cloak for discriminatory racial practices.

full: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/02/us/southern-manners-on-decline-some-say.html

[ingac70]

1. "blacks and whites lived with a code of hyper-politeness"

Blacks lived with a code of hyper politeness. Whites acted any old damn way they pleased.

[Marazinia]

5. Not necessarily

I sir and ma'am people to death because I've lived here so long. It's just long habit to be polite. A lot of people are also very friendly and open, they'll talk to strangers far more than northerners will. I know, I've lived in the north, too. There are good things about the south. And the bad things have gotten better even in the past 20 or so years.

Does that mean I like living here?

Hell no.

[dtexdem]

2. I reckon y'all's manners are gettin worse ...

and I'm fixin' to do somethin about it: spit in yore face.

;-)

[southernyankeebelle]

3. I wonder if the bartender would have said anything if they women had been ugly?

[Populist_Prole]

4. I always found the southeast civility a mere veneer

The same people who "yes sir" and "yes ma'am" everything that moves are the rudest most aggressive drivers on the road.

These same people who bless this and bless that are the most hyper-competitive types when it comes to faith. If you're not of their's....you aint "in". If you fail to be swayed by their proseletizing....you're an evil benighted heathen.

When it comes to race, I've had acquaintances openly mock and disparage someone just for being black....stated in a kind of wink wink, nod nod dog-whistle way....as though they automatically figured I'd agree with them...just because I'm white.

[MedicalAdmin]

6. It's like that here too.

Minnesota nice is a facade to hide passive agressive behavior generally speaking. ON the other hand I know some old time Minnesotans who are really really nice so maybe it is just fading...

[shanti]

7. well, bless their hearts

(or in other words, fuuuuuck you)....or so i've been told ;-)

[Macoy]

8. Bless Your Hearts

I have a problem with people being forced to give up their seats based on gender. I believe I would have said “bless your heart” and refused if I was asked to move.


Macoy