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The wine-lover's guide to the apocalypse, By Mark Morford [View All]

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madokie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-22-10 07:04 AM
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The wine-lover's guide to the apocalypse, By Mark Morford
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OMG, you guys! What if you woke up one morning and walked outside and, oh my God, everyone was completely gone?

What if all you saw were burned-out buildings, the smoking hulks of military trucks, lots of howling shadows and, well, that was totally it, except for maybe a handful of hot, suspicious-looking co-survivors with shifty eyes and large weapons all accompanied by a lone supermodel female wearing a deliciously filthy wifebeater T-shirt? Whoa.

Wait no, better yet: What if you awoke in the hospital, stumbled outside in your bloody gown, and everyone had turned into a strangely lethargic brain-eating zombie or a really fast blood-spitting zombie, and ... no, no wait, you awoke in a spaceship, inside a stifling air-locked capsule with no memory of who you were or how you got there, malevolence was clearly lurking every corner, and everything was claustrophobic and spooky and metallic?

In the woods! You wake up in the woods covered in blood and broken glass, in a crashed car, with a duffel bag full of cash and guns and nine mysterious passports with your picture in each of them, and you have 24 hours to piece it all together before you're killed by armies of zombie ninja robots in black helicopters. Wouldn't that be awesome? Someone should make a movie. Oh wait. ...

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