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knixphan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-01-11 02:33 AM
Response to Original message
1. Paul's World

"Thank you for calling the new, *Privatized Fema...

Your call is important to us. If you are calling for emergency assistance or to make a claim press 1. If your phones have been disabled due to disaster press 2 ...and realize you will have never heard this message. If you want to check on the status of your claim go fuck yourself."


"Please hold. There are currently, 8,014 calls ahead of you. Your call is important to us. An agent will be with you between the hours of 7am and 9pm today, or tomorrow, or possibly next week."

"Hello, this is Ingmar, what is your account number?"

Me: "I don't have it, my house was destroyed in the disaster"

"Well I am sorry sir, I need your account information"

Me: "Can you look it up another way?"

"I would have to check with my manager."

Me: "I don't have time, people are dying here!"

"Hmm, interesting. Everything is fine here in the Phillipines. Did you try to reboot?"
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