How do you deal with racism within the Democratic party and society in general?

[FreeState]

Im looking for some ideas for ways for me to deal with much of what Im feeling of homophobia from the party and it dawned on me that the members of DU that are minorities probably have much more experience at this than most of the GLBT posters (most of us became activist at an older age after coming out - Im assuming most of you have had activism for racial and civil equality since being children - be it on an interpersonal level or larger - I realize that is an assumption but I think for some if not a majority here that may be true).

In the last year since the passage of Prop 8 etc I have gone the gamut of emotions. I cried myself to sleep for 2 weeks. I gained 35 lbs and now lost the wight. My relationship has suffered. You name it has effected it in some way or other. I think part of the reason was I live in an area that is so accepting I had miss judged where we actually were. Its almost like being thrown back in high school when thought we had all graduated and moved on.

So how do you do on a personal level to live your life as fully as possible without letting societies racism overcome you? It seems that no matter how hard I try the feelings of frustration and sadness creep up. Im not depressed just fed up with the roller coaster ride. I wish I was one that could just brush it off and keep going without digesting the feelings but unfortunately Im not.

How do you deal with the institutionalized racism, be it at work or on DU or wherever? I know about educating people but sometimes it just seems impossible - like no one wants to listen or even help out or worse yet refuse to see whats right in front of them?

Any advice? What works? What doesnt? How do you get the party to see its not helping or being supportive where it needs to be? How do you get people that claim to be supportive to actually do more than sit on their buts and agree with you?

(Im meaning for this to be more of what works for issues with racism than advice on what GLBT should do).