Reply #12: Dysfunctional

[MorningGlow]

That reminds me of a thought I had in one of my more lucid, rational moments during this whole drama--why am I fighting to stay in a place that's this dysfunctional? Am I such a "fixer" that I think I can right the wrongs that are so deep-seated in this place? That's probably my skewed viewpoint at the bottom of all this.

But you're right--this is NOT going to change. Enlightened people and their opinions and ideas will NOT be welcome. All I can do is change my own view of the situation ("live with it") (which is reprehensible to me) or remove myself from it. Looks like the latter is the smarter move.

You're right--DH is very concerned about what the job is doing to me. He doesn't say so outright, but when I look tired (even if it's only 8 p.m.), he says "Go to bed." (I don't, of course, but it's kind of him to try to get me to go.) And last weekend when MG Jr. was putting up a mild fuss about something (putting on a jacket, I think), DH said to him (joking but serious), "You've got to get one thing straight--mama's the boss and we just do what she says. You're not the boss; I'm not the boss. I've seen the boss' job, and I don't want it!" (Because mama's job is 24/7 of course--work, kid, house, etc.)

DH did also say that his taking on extra freelance work would only be temporary till I could build up my onw freelance clientele again.

So...the only thing stopping me is me...