Reply #13: Your "father" is a link in a chain of abuse...

[Indi Guy]

He has a choice whether to continue down this destructive path, or to be a man (my guess is that he's too immature to become a man right now).

You are also a link in this chain. You deserved love and protection from your parents. You were hurt by the very people who were supposed to protect you. You got screwed. It was not fair.

You are forced to growup too fast, because your parents didn't do their parental jobs.

If they're forcing you to be the strong one here -- go ahead & do it. Tell them that you will spend Christmas by yourself & be prepared to do it. You're 19. You can rent a hotel room & have Christmas dinner in a restaurant, rather than deal with having your abusive dad at the same table.

Yeah it would be lonely; but I'd rather be lonely by my self, than lonely in a crowd.

The message you send by your absence will have long lasting results. Your presence will never be taken for granted again.

Everyone has a right to outs.