Reply #2: My Father can't cook

[Chan790]

*Chili Pie: Exactly what it sounds like. Hormel canned chili with beans dumped into a Keebler (thus, obviously sweetened) pie crust, topped with cheese and baked until either the pie crust or the cheese caught fire. This was actually the best of show of his repetoire.

*Porcupine Balls: These might have been more desirable if they were what they sounded like, scary as that thought may be. Ground pork balls coated in uncooked, dry beef rice-a-roni and then baked or grilled. One lacerated my larnyx once.

*Scorched Flour Gravy: This is an old southern recipe and he actually got it right...then he poured it over a Duncan Hines yellow cake and served it with bacon.

*Heart Attacks: bacon and cheddar wrapped in bologna, then fried.

*Bacon: pretty self explanatory...except that it was a food group to him. Usually served to his 7 and 5 year old sons with Miller Lite.

*Chocolate Omelet: Chocolate and eggs with American cheese and M&Ms.

He wonders why I'm a vegetarian/trying-to-be vegan.