Reply #10: Food.

[trof]

If you're from Virginia, you know it's a southern tradition.
My mom used to take some food to the house and say "These are my flowers".

I do the same now.

No one in the family wants to think about eating now, but they must eat.
If I learn shortly after the death, I take a deli platter. Something they can make sandwiches with and some bread, mayo, mustard,chips, drinks, paper plates, napkins, EVERYTHING they'll need to put a quick meal together.

If it's later, Miz t. makes a big pot of gumbo, or some other one-dish meal.

So sorry.