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Edited on Thu Aug-28-03 04:21 PM by rainy
I got this in an e-mail today
THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER > > > > > > I know the old version has circulated around before, however, read > > > the new version---really good. > > > > > > OLD VERSION: > > > > > > The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building > his > > > house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks > > > he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. > > > Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. > > > The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold. > > > > > > MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself! > > > > > > MODERN VERSION: > > > > > > The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building > > > his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper > > > thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. > > > Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and > > > demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well > fed > > > while others are cold and starving. > > > > > > CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering > > > grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with > a > > > table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. > > > How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor > > > grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? > > > > > > Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody > > > cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green." > > > > > > Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house > where > > > the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome". Jesse > > > then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's > > sake. > > > > > > Tom Daschle & Walter Mondale exclaim in an interview with Peter > > > Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the > grasshopper, > > > and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay > his > > > "fair share". > > > > > > Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper > > > Act", retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined > for > > > failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having > > > nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated > > > by the government. > > > > > > Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a > > > defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a > panel > > > of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent > > > welfare recipients. > > > > > > The ant loses the case. > > > > > > The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits > of > > > the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just > happens > > > to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't > > > maintain it. > > > > > > The ant has disappeared in the snow. > > > > > > The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the > > > house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who > terrorize > > > the once peaceful neighborhood. > > > > > > MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican > > >
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