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Equal Time with Bob Boudelang

"Our Great President Who Is not An Incompetent Failure Will Lead America Against Our Enemies Like SpongeBob, So There!!"

January 22, 2005
By Bob Boudelang, Angry American Patriot

Well well well! Who is not happy as a crab about seeing the Oaf of Office again in Washington D&C, and hearing Our Great President get through his speech with only a few mistakes? Not me, because I ended up in Philadelphia again which was not my fault but was Democrap treachery by a minority who did not know he was a slave on the LIEberal plantation. But still!

It is an inspiration to know that George W. will stand up for America's values against our enemies like DemocRATS, France, and SpongeBob Squidpants.

I mention SpongeBob because he is an enemy even more insidious than Sodom Husane. Sodom Husane would of attacked us with weapons of mass distraction if he would have had any, but SpongeBob is using an even more inserious weapon: tolerance!

Yes that is right. Can you believe it!? Little children are being taught to be kind and tolerant toward other people instead of throwing the first stone like it says in the Bible. Great Americans like Trent Lott and Jerry Falwell would be turning over in their graves if they was dead.

Well, Our Great President dragged Sodom Husane out of his spider hole, and the sooner he drags Sponge Bob out of the pie napkin under the scene, the better. This is no time to be tolerant toward anyone, much less gayo-Americans. I am sure that if her father, Our Great Vice President, let her talk even militant Lesbian-Americans like Mary Cheney would say that she ought to be discriminated against.

I blame the whole SpongeBob crisis on liberal and moderate permissiveness and those sixties values. If we had leaders who put their foot down when Yogi Bear and Boo Boo were living together, we would not be in this danger today. And you know it.

I was on my way to the hysteric spectacle in Our Great President's Capital, but the bus driver turned out to be a black African American who promised to tell me when we got to Washington. Naturally I could not keep from remarking how proud he must be that a non-uppity black person like Concertina Rice was going to be the next Secretary Estate, and how it must have made his blood boil to hear Democrap Socialists pointing out things she said just because they were not true.

Anyway, he said "You get out here now" but it turned out to be Philadelphia and not Washington D&C. Which I do not think was a mistake but was deliberate on his part. I guess he was another one afraid to hear the conservative "story" that conflicts with his truth.

But I did get to hear Our Great President's speech, or most of it, as there was a TV on at the bus station.

A couple of observations here. Now generally Inaugural speeches are not mean to be funny but youšll have to excuse me for laughing out loud once or twice.

Early in his speech, George W. said this: "Our duties are defined not by the words I use... but by the history we have seen together."

LOL! This line has me laughing my ass off! Why? Think about all of the Democraps who have been whining about how Bush said this or Bush said that or that was unpresidential or "I can't believe he said that!"

But what George W. was basically saying yesterday was never mind my words... pay attention to the history that has occurred that we would of seen with our own eyes if we had listened to Rush Limbaugh and Fox News.

The second thing that made me laugh was aimed at our very good friends—The French.

Our Great President said "All the allies of the United States can know: we honor your friendship, we rely on your counsel and we depend on your help."

Ok that's good-but it gets better:

"Division among free nations is a primary goal of freedom's enemies."

In other words, the terrorists love it that you have decided to cross swords with the U.S. Somewhere in a cave—Bin Laden and his minions are dancing and celebrating at this division. And no, that cave is not in Iraq but that is not the point. The point is that if France had not stopped to see if what George W. said was true but had charged blindly ahead like we did, there would not be division at all. But now there is and France must pay the terrible price of having fried potatoes and toast called "Freedom" hahahaha.

What's so hard about that anyway? But they hate hearing stuff like this from Our Great President.

LIEberals also hate that George W. talked about how destroying Social Security was just like FDR putting it in. That is because they are wedded to the past and not in tune with exciting new ideas like this, and just because it was rejected in his last term does not mean that we should not pretend it is brand new and start over. What better way to keep America's old people prosperous than by making them gamble their money on the stock market?

So enclosing, let us all knuckle under to Our Great President and his slightest wim and show the rest of the world what freedom and liberty really mean to Republicans. Remember the poll that said "Nation split on Bush as uniter or divider"? Let us not rest until the entire country is 100% sure which.

Bob Boudelang is a Republican team leader who probably would of got to dance with Jenna if he had not got stuck in Philadelphia. He can be reached at for a position in the new administration hint hint hint.

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