Democratic Underground

Equal Time with Bob Boudelang

"Who Can Trust a Thieving, Lying Drunk?"

November 13, 2004
By Bob Boudelang, Angry American Patriot Esther Brown-Rosenfeld

I don't know where the hell he is. Off on some bender probably. He's behind in his rent again, and the last thing I need is to waste time sitting here writing his damn column for him. But they called and said "We need his column" so here I am filling in.

I suspect he's been a lazy crooked drunk all his life. I know he'll steal just about anything that isn't nailed down, and you can't trust him as far as you can throw him. When you think of it, Bob's not so far from that idiot Bush he's always carrying on about.

Just as well the schmuck is off somewhere. I don't think I could stand to hear that idiot gloating about the crappy election results.

From the way they carry on on TV you'd think the country unanimously shouted "We want George" on Tuesday night.

Listen, give me a frigging break. The goddamn thug spent the entire campaign slandering a good and decent man. He lied on every subject big and small (what kind of useless twit doesn't know he owns a lumber mill I ask you?). He and his gang of thugs tore up Democratic voter registrations, moved polling places around, intimidated voters, and did everything that they could to screw up the election.

You got the head of the voting machine company writing letters to people saying "I'll do everything I can" to get this nitwit back in the office he don't deserve. You even got the guys who came from the UN to supervise saying in the International Herald Tribune that this election was more screwed up than the ones in Serbia or the Congo.

And now they want to say he's got a mandate. Listen, honey, he's got a mandate the way Iraq is a mission accomplished. If he's a winner, then I'm happy to be with the losers - the smell is better and I can sleep nights.

He's got a mandate? Let's see him walk down a city street in this country and answer questions from the folks he meets - assuming they don't spit on him and throw rocks. Let's see him get in front of ordinary people that didn't sign loyalty oaths - we'll find out quick what kind of mandate he has.

Let's see him go to some funerals for the kids who are getting killed in Iraq over nothing at all except that he had to be such a hotsy-totsy war president. Let him look those people in the eye and show the rest of us his mandate.

And now he's going to privatize Social Security? My shiny heinie he's going to privatize Social Security!

Let's not forget that this pisher tried it before. Starting back when he was running against Al Gore, who would have been a better president on his worst day than this guy was on his best. Georgie said Al Gore wanted to make Social Security a federal program. (Oh yes, he did too.) He actually told some of these idiots that they would be better off with their money in Enron than in Social Security.

So after the election, he names this big deal commission headed by Daniel Moynihan (oy!) and some gink named Parsons who ran AOL into the ground while he made millions. Parsons already has got fined by the Department of Labor for cheating his workers out of benefits, mind you. Some of the other folks on that commission were going to make millions out of privatization. A swell lot of thieves these were.

So the committee swears up and down they're not going to raise the retirement age or cut benefits. They meet illegally in secret (what else is new?) and when they put out a report with three different schemes to steal the trust fund. And every scheme involves raising the retirement age and cutting benefits.

So I hope nobody is too depressed that Junior Birdman won on Tuesday. Believe me, I've seen worse. That evil son of a bitch Nixon was worse. A big big victory he had, and the same terrible people shouted and cheered "Four More Years." But his crookedness fell apart quick too. It's what they call karma, and it runs over dogma every time. (That joke always cracks me up.)

The victory or the loss is not the important thing anyway. In the end, it is who you are and what you stand for. I would rather stand with decent people.

Yes, America has its share of vicious crazies. You cannot live in a trailer park near Bob Boudelang and not know that. But most Americans are decent good people. They can be fooled. They can be scared. They can be cheated. But never for long. And at the bottom they are mostly not mean-spirited or selfish. A crook can hide behind the Bible or the flag, but in the end his crookedness will come out, and people will see for themselves.

As for me, I am going to keep working with my local peace group and keep agitating, if for no other reason than it annoys people like Bob Boudelang, who if his trailer had all its wheels would be gone from Daisyview yesterday. So there!

Bob Boudelang will turn up sooner or later, and he'll lie about where he's been too, as usual. You could write to him at but if it's money he owes you, oh, do I feel sorry for you.

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