Democratic Underground

Equal Time with Bob Boudelang

"Our Great President Is Not A Corrupt Incompetent Drunk So Stop Saying That! And Vote for Him If They Let You, Or Else"

October 30, 2004
By Bob Boudelang, Angry American Patriot

Well, election time is here again, dammit, and before putsch comes to shove, let me urge all of my fateful readers to go out and vote for Our Great President if they let you. After all, he is not a cowardly drunk, despite what Mrs. Brown Rosenfeld says, and you really should not listen to her when she says he is incompetent and corrupt, for she is a LIEberal. And now she is going on and on about those missing explosives in Iraq, just like John Kerry, who is only hurting himself by pointing out the missing explosives in public and saying Our Great President did not plan for the war.

I mean. First John Kerry says there was no WMDs in Iraq, and now he says that Our Great President did not plan for the war. Which is it? And, by the way, if George W. did plan for the war, we would not be stuck in the war now! Did you think we got there by accident? No, that was ALL George W.

Got you there, Mr. Smarty-Pants Liberal! It is simple logic, which Democraps are immune to.

And everybody knows that when John Kerry is saying the missing explosives at Al Kaka are "more evidence that President Bush has bungled the Iraq war by not securing the weapons site," he is really criticizing our brave troops, and in a bad way, not the good way Rudy Julieannie was when he is criticizing our troops by saying "No matter how you try to blame it on the president the actual responsibility for it really would be for the troops that were there. Did they search carefully enough? Didn't they search carefully enough?"

Just think of all the good things Our Great President has done and you will see why the Supremes on the Court should pick him again! (Editor, please insert that list of good things Our Great President has done here. I am sure you can find one somewhere.)

And the Republicans continue to be alert to the slightest danger threatening our country, if you donšt count the missing explosives. Just this week, Our Homely Secretary of Security Tom Ridge clamped down on the Magic Cube because it could of been stealing the Rubix Cube copyright. And even though it was not stealing the Rubix Cube copyright, but could have been, so was it not better to be safe than sorry. After all, where would we be if Americašs enemies was to steal the Rubix cube copyright? We would be in some pretty pickle I can tell you. But thanks to George W. and Homely Secretary Ridge, we are not in any danger from the Magic Cube. You just know John Kerry would not be alert to this dangerous crisis, so we are lucky there wasnšt one.

What if we had the sort of President who was distracted by missing explosives or tapes from some obscure madman in some remote country somewhere, and did not take action on a magic cube crisis? The mind Bobbles. Fortunately we have George W. who knows what is important and what is not.

And Our Great President continues to work his magic for ordinary Americans, too. Now he has a new program for kids called Cheers that will let the chemical industry test pesticides and other substances on children! What could be fairer than that? I myself have been eating ant paste for some time now (it is especially good spread on Chicken in a Biskit crackers) and despite envirowhacko concerns I am right as rain except for the dizziness and the sweats and the rash, which you cannot prove is due to the ant paste.

Still the DemoncRats continue with their slander and lies, especially about that fine company that which you cannot prove Our Great Vice President has anything to do with when they got all those no-bid contracts and cannot account for the property they were supposed to take care of. I do not know whošs worse sometimes, the Democrats or the terrorists. But then I think, the terrorists would not call for an FBI investigation, would they?

So that is why it is important we all take the Bush Pledge of Allegiance out loud from now until election day. Otherwise all that has been accomplished, from the excitement of September 11th to the tax breaks for people like Ken Lay, is in danger of going the way of the doodoo. Keep saying the Pledge, even when you think you want to go to sleep. And follow me to the poles on November 3rd to victory!

Bob Boudelang is proud to be a Republican team leader who can be reached at And they should not be able to throw me out of the public library for trying to lead people in the Bush Pledge of Allegiance out lou

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