Equal Time with Bob Boudelang
"Bush Did Not Run and Hide and Neither Did I So Stop Saying That"
October 5, 2001
by Bob Boudelang

In the interests of fairness and impartiality, we've decided that it's about time the conservatives had a voice on this website. So here he is - Bob Boudelang, American Patriot, with this week's rebuttal...

At last we all see the greatness of our terrific President Bush that was plain to see. He did not run away and hide the day of the terrorist attacks, and everybody knows it. Neither did I, so stop saying that. Now he will deal with terrorism everywhere the way he dealthwith the evil Red Chinese, who he did not apologize to but just said "I'm sorry" to. Get that straight!

I was not just hiding in the woods. That is what so-called Liberals would like you to think. But if it were not for patriots like me and the Free White Organization of God, and hundreds of other malicious across this great land, Muslins might have marched right across this country and then where would we be.

We were following our rigorous training and discipline, or rather we would have been. Kennyıs mother, however, would not let him stay out after dark. And Bud was too busy increasing prices at the gas station that morning to get away. Which was not price gouging, like the corrupt DemocRat attorney general alledges but merely the law of supply and demand and the miracle of capitalism in action. Bud says he will fight the indictment all the way to court if necessary, and that is good enough for me.

That reduced the FWOG that morning to just me and Mr. Padnavathamıs nephew Arjay, who was playing hookey from Herbert Hoover High. Strictly speaking he is not white, but he did have his car and funds for emergency provisions, which was not just beer, so stop saying that. We also had slim jims. Or we would of if he hadnıt driven off with them while we were setting up Alpha Base One in Jenkins Woods. He also took off before I could get my guns out of the trunk.

However, as anyone who has seen Rambo knows, commandos like me and Rocky are dangerous weapons all by ourselves. And while I was sharpening a stick in the rain, it gave me time to think about this great country and how now that we were united as never before we could focus on the evil confronting us: the Klintoons and the Socialist Commie Democrats.

By the way, where would this great country of ours be NOW if we were still burdened down with a surplus? I ask you? Thank God President Bush and our great Republican leaders were smart enough to give the money to the rich so they could create the jobs Americans were getting laid off from due to terrorist attacks even before they happened. That is why we need capital gains tax cuts now, so that the giants of capitalism who bailed out of Wall Street to protect us all donıt get unfairly penalized by paying taxes like they were ordinary people.

And I hope now that even misguided fools like liberals can see the folly of gun control and why guns should be allowed everywhere, especially on airline flights. I was very proud that when Arjay and his friends were arrested for shooting out street lights, they said they stole the guns from me instead of revealing they were members of the secret FWOG. I was also surprised to find Arjay had recruited some members on his own from the kids he hangs out with, although I wish he had checked with me, as I am the Grand Avatar of FWOG. It goes to show the positive benefits of guns. I would tell Mr. Padnavatham so too, except he is angry enough and mired in the darkness of Hindu, as Reverend Cloyd says.

I am sad to report that it has caused a rift in the FWOG, as Kenny was disgusted to learn I had let a black person in, although Arjay is not black like ordinary black people and Kenny can only use his Momıs Buick when she is not at work or at the Red Bear Lounge and so he cannot be counted on in a crisis. He is going back to being the Ku Klux Klan, even though because of his wheezing everyone knows who it is under the hood. It is just as well, as his mom never made us FWOG uniforms like his although he kept promising that she would. Mine would have had epalets too.

It goes to show what they say about fair weather friends and sunshine patriots is true, whatever it is. These are the darkest days since Pearl Harbor, when millions of people went to see Alex Baldwin in a movie this summer even though he had been rude about our great President Bush. We FWOG members boycotted opening night like Dr. Laura but it did no good, and some teenager threw a soda on me. I guess he is laughing out of the other side of his neck now. If he had gone to France like he promised, he would have missed George W. as he read his inspiring speech and did not sound like an idiot. So there.

Instead President Bush has even higher approval ratings than his dad did when he destroyed Sodom Husane, or would have because of the liberals. And yet people blamed him unfairly, and voted him out before his eight years of peace and prosperity could begin. Now we are mired in the Kliton recession, which began as soon as Slick Willy left office, and as a result we have to put up with the Hildebeast yawning while our great President speaks just because the unAmerican traitors in New York voted for her. It is clear as the nose on your face, and unfair.

Another words, there is this constant drumstick of criticism which has yet to begin, thanks to the Democrats phony "unity." It is just as fake as their "diversity" which is really people of all races getting together deliberately. You know Tom Dasshole is going to say that George W. hid in Nebraska during the attacks for ten hours and that there was no credulous evidence. Well, just let him try saying that and see. George W was not doing that because he was afraid, he was doing that to be safe. The whole world knows that, just like they know he was not AWOL even though there is no proof. Character does matter.

Now is the time to turn to recovery and revenge and dumping on the Clintons together as a great nation would. As our great President said yesterday in meeting with real industry leaders, "I believe around this table, for example, believe it's important to be aggressive on the front end, that the risk-reward ratio is beneficial to be more aggressive on the front end and obviously we agree with that. I can be very specific, just like I have been." I think even Alan Greenspan would have been amazed to hear that.

Those great captains of industry were an inspiring sight to see. As President Bush said, "They're dedicated to the workers that work for their company. They're dedicated to providing security for their workers so they can go to work feeling safely." That is why they are laying off workers, to provide job security for every one. It is time we got together behind them, and stand up straight and strong, just as I did down in my foxhole in the woods with my stick, where I was not hiding but defending, so stop saying that.

Otherwise it will not be patriotic Americans like me ending your freedom of speech, and abortion, and worker rights, and enviro junk science, and homosexuals, and civil rights, and affirmative action, but a foreign tyrant. And no one wants that.

Bob Boudelang is a brave American patriot and a leader of men even if Kennyıs mom did not make him the uniform Kenny promised she would. And he did not run and hide in the woods. So stop saying that.

Read Bob's other rebuttals