Democratic Underground

Equal Time with Bob Boudelang
June 29, 2001
by Bob Boudelang

In the interests of fairness and impartiality, we've decided that it's about time the conservatives had a voice on this website. So here he is - Bob Boudelang, American Patriot, with this week's rebuttal:

Another Triumph in Europe for Bush, (whose daughters are NOT sluts)!!

It burns me and every other patriotic American up to see the liberal socialist media declaring that Bush's trip to Europe was a fiasco and his daughters are drunken sluts. This is so unfair, after we saved their butts in World War 2. There wasn't those kind of attacks on Chelsea, who really was the kind of drunken slut LIEberals say Jenna and what's her name are, and anyway the press didn't print them except for Fox news. This lying has got to end so we Republicans can start telling our stories.

First there was the arsenic lie, then the Bush stole the election lie, then the global warning lie. Actually, it was Bush stole the election first. Then came arsenic which he didn't really raise the levels of. He just kept them from being lowered, which Slick Willie should have done sooner so the Republicans could attack him for it as should have happened. Instead there is criticism of our great president who isn't that dumb. The whole world can see that if China was to build atomic missiles in ten years we would have no defense against them now. The same with Libya. That's why we need a missile defense system. Just because it doesn't work is no excuse. After all, did Neil Armstrong fly to the moon the first time? You would be laughing out of the other side of your neck if a missile blew up Los Angeles, which is full of pinkoCommies and ought to be destroyed anyway.

When is Barbara Striesland going to move to France or Alec Baldwin, like they promised? After all, Bush won the election, if you count the Supreme Court and the Electrical College. And now intellectuals and show business people are joking about our great president and his two fine daughters. Who among us has not got plastered on margaritas using a fake ID? Yes, Bush signed a zero tolerance law when he was governor of Texas, but that did not mean good kids. It distracted the whole country from his triumph in Europe, which was a successful one and not a failure like everyone says. Get that straight! Yes, he said the Spanish president's name wrong but you would think it was the only time anybody ever mispronounced anything. Good god, can't we get on to discussing real issues instead of this global warming stuff?

And why were they so upset over there about the death penalty? If they wanted to kill their citizens, we would let them. We might even help out You have to contrast that with the way the liberal press treated Clinton. Nobody ever asked Clinton why he killed all those people like they did Bush. It is so unfair. Bush was right to toss out the Yoyo Treaty. Yes, those scientists said global warming was real, but they are biased toward science. More study is obviously needed. Plus it is unfair to ask us to cut back on our SUV's and speedboats and jet skis and snowmobiles and such, when India is not cutting back on theirs.

They were certainly happy to see Americans in Europe when we saved them from the Germans in two wars. But now they give our great president a hard time although they loved Slick Willie. He said things they wanted to hear and he fooled them just like he fooled America. Fortunately Americans could see through him and voted Al Gore out, as long as you don't mean actual votes which mean nothing. Now we have George W. Bush, a president who stands up to talk about what is good for America, and all he gets is criticism here and abroad and jokes about drunk daughters. We need that missile plan to replace the outdated ABM treaty, and that is why we must break that treaty. Even if it leaves America all alone with the rest of the world against us, we must protect ourselves against rogue nations.

Look at Japan. They are friends even though Bush Senior vomited on their president, and even though they sank our submarine with their fishing boat. But that is not good enough for France, although we saved them from Germany, or good enough for Germany even though we beat the pants off them twice. It is not even good enough for England, after George Bush and their president Tony Blair shared their toothpaste and everything.

Fortunately the important countries, like Spain and Russia, still love us. Bush and Putin talked for almost 90 minutes and our great president was able to see right into Putin's soul. He has daughters too, although they have not been arrested, which is unfair to bring up. Putin ran the KGB and George's dad ran the CIA, so right away the two great leaders were able to form a bond of trust. On his trip, Bush refused to get sidetracked into unimportant issues like the future, global warming, or the economy. Instead, he kept focused on having a defense now for those missiles that are going to be built someday, no matter what the cost or if they ever work.

He had Colon Powell and Concertina Rice along and they explained what he had said to the European leaders, who listened politely. It is a shame the whole country got the wrong idea about the trip because of all the protests, like the Swedes pulling down their pants. If you want to see the bias of the press look at the difference in how the Swedes were treated when they pulled down their pants and how Jenna and the other one was treated. That was just as funny, but nobody laughed. It makes you think. Wake up, America, and smell the coffee on the morning after.

Bob Boudelang is a patriotic American patriot who wants nothing to do with liberals. He is a NRA life member and was only questioned, not arrested, last week.

Read Bob's other rebuttals

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