Blog Box

July 1, 2005
Compiled by Delilah Boyd, A Scrivener's Lament

This week, KKKarl Rove took a hit for his team in the name of diversion, oil reached $60 per barrel, Rumsfeld took a verbal dump on national TV, and Revoltin' Bolton entered the Bermuda Triangle of presidential appointments.

Add some whacked Supreme Court shenanigans, some bull shark/pit bull chompings, and a lame-assed "Stay The Course/Join The Armed Forces" prime-time speech... and you've got yourself one hell of a week for bloggers!

The Supreme Court Strikes Again

I haven't felt this betrayed since that Nazi Rolf blew the whistle on the Von Trapps. Do the Supremes really believe that Repuke-run municipalities won't bulldoze neighborhoods for their real estate developer buddies? The Big Picture asks, "What kind of madness is this?" ACS (the blog of the American Constitution Society) notes the Supremes' interesting Miller/Cooper ruling. Swing State Project has the 411 on this week's rulings, including the "If it's art, it's not really religious" Ten Commandments decision.

More Supreme Court crap has to be filed under...

Fascist Fundie Watch

The Panda's Thumb is convinced that the Supreme Court's Ten Commandments ruling is good news for those of us who abhor the thought of Jesus in the science books. Fantasy Life notes that Justice-less Scalia, in his dissenting opinion, claims (pretty much) that the state of Kentucky is permitted to display the Ten Commandments in its courtrooms because we were attacked by Al Qaeda.

In other Fascist Fundie news...

Remember Venganza, the extremely clever liberal smart ass who wrote the letter to the Fascist Fundie Board of Education in Kansas? Well, he's now concluded, based on scientific methodology in line with the "Intelligent Design" model, that the decline in the number of pirates is directly related to global warming.

By the way, Venganza included this depiction of his deity of choice, The Flying Spaghetti Monster in his hysterically funny letter to the Kansas Board of Education:

P.S. I have included an artistic drawing of Him creating a mountain, trees, and a midget. Remember, we are all His creatures.

Let's cut to the chase: if you include one creation myth in your science curriculum, you have to include them all.

Mr. Bolton? Please Hold

Will he or won't he? Inquiring minds want to know if George W. Coward will slip John Bolton through the back door, recess appointment style, which would make Bolton the ultimate temp worker. Sumo Merriment explains it all for you:

"A recess appointment for Bolton would allow him to serve as ambassador until a new Congress is seated in January 2007. (I see this as a done deal myself...why not? Remember Bush has a mandate for crap's sake!)"

I'm with you on this one, Sumo. On my blog A Scrivener's Lament, I created this graphic in Bolton's honor:

In the continuing saga of "Karl Rove Bites The Big One For BushCo," bloggers paid homage this week to the, er, man behind the curtain.

Some clever DUers weighed in with creative captions and descriptions of Rove...

BurtWorm: "When I saw those towers fall, I didn't want to understand the terrorists. I wanted to figure out how to keep people from focusing on who was president when it happened. Ha! Ha!" RobertSeattle: "... looks like a scrotum in a suit." seemslikeadream: "We sure have seen quite a bit of KKKarl these days." And I chimed in: "Jabba The Hutt with less hair."

Josh Marshall, Peter Daou and Mahablog have more to say about KKKarl. Rogue Planet has all of the links.

Some People Get Real News (Just Not Us)

Blogging from Romania, Flogging the Simian links to daily news reports, which those of us stateside only wish our sorry excuse for a national news media would cover:

Exhibit A: The Georgian media has apologized for claiming that a Bulgarian tossed that grenade at George W. Bush recently. Reports now claim that it might've been a Russian soldier.

Exhibit B: Pakistan has released 35 recent Gitmo-released prisoners into the general population. The catch? To be set free, all the Gitmo grads and their families had to do was promise that they wouldn't commit any terrorist acts.

Exhibit C: The USA is sending Egypt 25 "Avenger" missile systems at a cost of $126 million.

Exhibit D: We're Number One! We're Number One! Yes, the USA is number #1 when it comes to imprisoning people! 22% of all prisoners in the world are incarcerated by good ol' Uncle Sam.

When freepers spout off about the "liberal media," ask if they know about those news stories cited above. Also, remind them that there are precious few shopping days until George W.'s birthday. The most popular gift recommendation is...

Away, Away With Rummy, By Gum!

Speaking of bullshit:

How convenient! Aren't you sick of Republicans who "can't recall" their controversial verbal bowel movements? Think Progress slams Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld's most recent "Meet The Press" spotless-mind lapse. It seems that Rummskulled "can't recall" telling George W. that the Iraqis might fight back after being invaded and occupied. In another post this week, Think Progress points out Rumsfeld's 1966 attack on LBJ's Vietnam credibility gap. (Thanks for the talking points, Rummy!)

Also zeroing in on the obvious, Cenk Uygur posts on the Huffington Blog: "How do you feel about your Secretary of Defense lying to you so brazenly? And, oh by the way, how do you feel about Iraqi submarines? And the nuclear capability they were supposed to have and the possibility that might be able to strike us in 45 minutes?"

Finally, DC blogger whyihatedc flings George W.'s birthday chapeau in every freeper's face:

Hey, remember North Korea? You know, that "axis of evil" member that actually does have nukes? If you do, you may find it funny that a certain Rev. Moon is kinda sorta helping to prop up its government. Throughout the 1990s, as Western observers predicted that the Kim dynasty that rules North Korea would collapse for lack of hard currency reserves, the Moon organization invested tens of millions of dollars, which apparently included payments made before U.S. sanctions eased in 1999. Even funnier: a lot of the Moon front organizations that do business in North Korea are headquartered at a certain newspaper building, located where New York Avenue meets the lovely Anacostia River.

Sorry, whyihatedc! The wingnuts don't seem to give a rat's dripping ass about the weird workings of Rev. Moon. They're too busy being dumber than dirt, which brings us to...

World's Dumbest Right-Winger Revealed

DUer Geek Tragedy has found the dumbest right-winger on the web! Think I'm kidding? Here's what the wingnut wanker wrote:

Now from, Bubbleheads, comes this report with photos of the anti-war crowd protesting at a military funeral! This is how far deranged the asshat anti-war movement has become. Check out this photograph of this asshat with a sign that says "Thank God for IED's" and "Thank God for 9/11".

Of course, he's referring to the FRED PHELPS protest. When confronted with the Fred Phelps facts, Wingnut Wanker wrote this:

And what are they all upset about? Are they upset about a deranged protest at a military funeral? Do they denounce this lunatic? Nope. They're simply upset at being lumped in with a crazy preacher.

Be sure to scroll down and read the comments! My personal favorite is, "You are so stupid it hurts my brain."

Bull Shark vs. Pit Bull (Warning: Graphic Image)

Jesus, Marconi, and Mohammed! What is wrong with people?

That's a shark on a lunch break, people! (AP Photo/Jason C. Miller)

Faces and Pit Bulls: Bad Combination (Google Image)

Brian at Musings From Brian J. Noggle wonders if this will be "The Summer of The Pit Bull" or "The Return Of The Shark." Brian muses, "Man, I cannot wait till the hysteredia brings us the climactic conclusion in two years: Shark Vs. Pit Bull: The Reckoning (tagline: 'People were only the appetizer')."

Of course, these stories are newsworthy. So are the stories of missing women and celebrity trials; however, the overkill media coverage has turned these news reports into editorial cartoon subjects. When "Helicopter Down In Iraq: 15-20 US Soldiers Dead" is relegated to the crawl at the bottom of your TV screen, something is seriously wrong, folks!

Dribbling Crude

Simply Appalling, one of the best bloggers beating BushCo upside the head on a regular basis, notes news reports claiming that the U.S. may not be bothered by the price of crude oil, but the Japanese are.

Meanwhile Forbes is running a piece by AFX, the business news subsidiary of Agence France-Presse, with the headline "Japan govt worried as crude oil futures hit record 60 usd a barrel - report" Why is the Japanese government worried? Japan has been reducing its dependence on oil as an energy source, and also has one of the most energy-efficient economies in the industrialized world. So Japan's primary concern is high oil prices might cause growth to slow in other less energy-efficient countries like the United States, and thus depress demand for Japanese exports.

At least someone is worried about our economy. How long will it take before our media pulls another mea culpa out of its ass and admits that they should've covered this story? Oil sat at $60 per barrel for days before dropping to $58 (due to profit taking). Of course, news whores rejoiced as if George W. had something to do with the price of oil "plummeting." Zprava (The Oil Blog) is the best site to bookmark for global oil news and current price info. The stories there are real eye openers.

And If You're Real Good, I'll Make You Feel Good, I Want Your Spirits To Climb

Such was the aim of George W.'s miserable failure (disguised as an important address to the nation regarding the war in Iraq) this week. Too bad. So sad. Speech sucked the big one. Even heavily Repuke-weighted polls made huge sucking noises.

Public Domain Progress posts: "Sometimes you just have to watch the train derail." Billmon sums up the stinky speech quite nicely: "The problem, I guess, is that while Bush was using the troops as a visual backdrop, politically speaking he was trying to hide behind them. And it showed."

Upon Further Review cuts through all of George W.'s "Speechifyin' To The People" BS and zeroes in on the obvious (which is always lost on the Bush-supporting Backside of the Bell Curve):

Ok, so instead of telling people over and over again how you have a strategy, why not tell people clearly what that strategy is, and not change it next week? And while you're at it, explain how that strategy in any way resembles the crap you sold to the American people in order to get us in to this was in the first place. "The Iraqi people are growing in optimism and hope," Bush said. "They understand that the violence is only a part of the reality in Iraq." Am I the only one who thinks it's incredibly presumptuous and insulting for him to speak for the Iraqi people?

No, you're not the only one. In fact, each time BushCo government officials hide behind phrases like "The Iraqi people understand," and "The Iraqi people know," I'm reminded of candidate Greg Stillson in The Dead Zone, shielding himself with the baby.

To me, this week's speech (all 28 minutes) sounded like an infomercial for military recruiters. I half expected that assmouth Billy Mays to offer some free Orange Glo to the first 100 callers.

Ignore The News Whores And Celebrate Real Freedom

It's officially summer. Don't swim with sharks, keep your face away from pit bulls, don't step in BushCo's BS, and fact check the corporate media's shit by reading your favorite blogs. Everyone who shills for BushCo (male or female) is a scrotum in a suit - don't trust any of them!

Instead, celebrate the the Fourth Of July this holiday weekend - and work to restore its true meaning.

Know a hot blog that needs some coverage? Send your recommendations to Delilah.

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