Our Yen for Dubya to One Day Make Sense
February 21, 2002
by Carlos Kelly

The words "devaluation" and "deflation" may both begin with the letter "D", end in the letter "N" and share other letters in "E", "L", "A", "T", "I" and "O" but they are two completely different words with completely different meanings.

Certainly enough difference in their meanings to send the Yen plummeting for a short while last Monday after Dubya's latest, but certainly not last, verbal gaffe.

This time it was the Japanese currency that suffered from Bush's laziness and stupidity but what will the next flub cause? The beginning of World War 3?

Ever since "The Felonious Five" hijacked the US constitution and installed their boy George into the White House, we've seen things emanate from this administration that we would have never dreamt of before.

Like the long-term disappearance of a Vice-President who seems to only exist on 'Meet The Press'. (Maybe his 'cave' is just down the corridor from Tim Russert's studio? Has anyone bothered to look?)

But surely the most surprising, well, considering who we are talking about maybe it isn't that surprising at all but heck, who would have thought that one day we would see the need for others in an administration to constantly interpret for the American people the supposed true meanings and intentions of what a US President has publicly said?

One minute it's Ari: 'Well, what the president really meant was blah, blah, blah and to criticize him for this would only aid terrorism.'

Or it's Mary Matalin:'Well, of course what he really meant was blah, blah, blah... and to think anything different would be completely un-American and show ones obvious support for terrorism.'

Or it's Uncle Dick in his weekly appearance on The Tim Russert Show: 'Well, quite obviously what the president meant by that was blah, blah, blah, blah. ... And I have to say that anyone who thinks he meant something different to that is a terrorist and will subsequently be arrested and transported to Guantanamo Bay, Cuba for the term of their natural life!'

Or it's cable news' latest 'matinee idol', Rummy Rumsfeld in his daily "It's Rummy" show, live from the Pentagon: 'No, no, no, no, no. What the president meant when he said that he would authorize the immediate bombing of Paris was that he prefers ketchup on his Hot Dog's with just a little onion, washed down with a refreshing root beer. Nothing more, nothing less and anyone who interprets what he said as meaning anything other than what I just explained is Un-American, collaborating with al-Qaeda and quite possibly related to John Walker-Lindh....now I won't hear anymore on that issue....thankyou....thankyou.'

Even the official White House transcripts now 'rectify' the text to portray what Bush meant to say as opposed to what he actually did say. Like this one here...

http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2002/02/20020218.html

...where it has placed a footnote half way down the page to denote that what Bush should have said was **deflation NOT devaluation.

Who would've thought we'd ever see the day, huh?

Maybe in the future the White House should dispense with these text transcripts and initiate some with colorful little pictures to show what Bush really meant say.

It certainly wouldn't do us thinking members of society much good but it may just enable Bush to figure out what it was he was meant to be rambling on about on any particular day while he wiles away the hours before his 9:00pm bedtime coloring in the official White House pictures from the official White House transcript.

So it's with bated breath that we all await the next Bush verbal balls-up. We all know it's coming soon. And with him currently being so close to a member of his "Axis of Evil" (North Korea) and with him being in full-on cowboy mode these days especially, we should all be very, very scared.

But then there's another thought. Maybe he meant to say what he said in Japan on Monday. Maybe his puppet-masters wanted the Yen to plummet for a short time. Maybe that's why the White House was so diligent in 'correcting' him on their official website.

Hmmmmm. I wouldn't put anything past this mob.