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(1,962 posts)
13. Some days, I don't know if it can be done without a "backfire effect"
Sun Mar 6, 2022, 04:40 AM
Mar 2022

There are some of the more frequent offenders that I don't think will change. Ever. Their minds are made up. At the very least, they feel we're less important than they are, and "since there are less of you," it's okay to sacrifice our rights for their sake. At the worst, they hate us just as much as the GOP does. Some of them barely hide their contempt for the trans community in their posts. Some don't even hide it at all.

As I posted more than once in response to the Lia Thomas shitstorm: Bigotry is the "obstinate or unreasonable attachment to a belief, opinion, or faction; in particular, prejudice against a person or people on the basis of their membership of a particular group." Doesn't matter if it's "We don't hate you, but, there's less of you and we're more important," or if it is indeed flat-out "We hate you." Using us as a pawn in their chess game or saying we have to go without so they can have theirs is still a form of bigotry.

You're absolutely right some of them will not listen. I saw it first-hand, attempting to speak up with first-hand experience of what it's like being a trans woman and facing institutionalized and organized bigotry. According to them, I was "talking down on them from a position of privilege." Right. If my life is one of privilege, I'd sure hate to see a life of being oppressed.

I don't know if much can be done beyond making it clear we won't be thrown under the bus, we won't be sacrificed for their sake, and we're not going to be bullied anymore. Even that might create a backfire effect, but... I don't know what else to say. Staying the course and maintaining the status quo is why transphobia and TERF shit became entrenched here in the first place for small but loud segment here. Sitting back and doing nothing will do nothing to improve things, and might make it worse. I think if the pushback had started a decade ago, even five years ago, things might be different than they are today. Too much shit went unopposed, and as a result, there are those who feel they can talk of us like we're not in the room and there's not a thing we can do to stop them.

The ones that hate us? I don't think there's a thing we can do to make them stop hating us. Maybe one day they'll open their eyes. Maybe not. But the bullying and bigotry and punching down has to stop, and I don't think it'll stop if it's allowed to go on unopposed.

I wish I had a better answer. I don't, sadly.

Some people are looking to cause division. Doodley Mar 2022 #1
How do we combat that? FreeState Mar 2022 #2
IMHO over 95% of the DU has a lot of love for the LGBT community. Best thing is to ignore trolls. Doodley Mar 2022 #5
Honestly? vercetti2021 Mar 2022 #3
I totally know how you feel FreeState Mar 2022 #6
Most are older members vercetti2021 Mar 2022 #8
Some days, I don't know if it can be done without a "backfire effect" IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #13
WTF is this? n/t gay texan Mar 2022 #4
Not sure what your asking FreeState Mar 2022 #7
I came to this website gay texan Mar 2022 #9
I don't know. I genuinely don't know. IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #10
I don't believe we truly matter here vercetti2021 Mar 2022 #11
We clearly matter to at least some... IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #12
I so want to give you a long hug lambchopp59 Mar 2022 #14
I want to hug you, all of the LGBTQ community, and all of our allies IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #17
I don't post on DU often anymore LostOne4Ever Mar 2022 #15
True on that IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #16
9 days after the thread/poll, and a week after my last reply... IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #18
After the wonderful week here... IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #19
Just yesterday: kochsucker Duncan Grant Mar 2022 #20
I saw that too and thought, "what's the point?" Behind the Aegis Mar 2022 #21
I took several days off after the "fun" last week... IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #22
Yet another weekly reply... IngridsLittleAngel Mar 2022 #23
I just changed mine too - DU is doing nothing FreeState Apr 2022 #24
I don't blame you IngridsLittleAngel Apr 2022 #25
Bumping because... IngridsLittleAngel Apr 2022 #26
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