HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Topics » Gender & Orientation » Men's Group (Group) » Let's talk about "Coerciv... » Reply #65
In the discussion thread: Let's talk about "Coercive Sex". [View all]

Response to redqueen (Reply #60)

Mon May 27, 2013, 08:22 PM

65. Please don't tell me what I WANT to hear.

Because you are wrong.

The thing is, if you want to redefine consent so that it is not binary, this is because you know that the mind is often in conflict -which is true. It is quite complicated negotiating a relationship. Guilt over another relationship, wanting to appear one way and not another, physical desire, wanting to please, religious concerns, baby sleeping next door, et. etc. etc.

It is complicated. We all agree. A person can be reluctant in one way but eager in another. You simply CANNOY lay the blame on a person that tries to persuade another to listen to one side of their brain over the other.

I may want to say no when my wife offers to buy me a new pair of expensive shoes because the money can be spent elsewhere. So I am non-commital. Part of me wants them, the other doesn't. If she says "Come on, you deserve them!".. Is she taking away my right to decide?

"Yes means maybe and maybe means no?" Sorry, that is bullshit. Condescending, disempowering bullshit. Yes means yes. No means no.

Responsibility.

Reply to this post

Back to OP Alert abuse Link to post in-thread

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 93 replies Author Time Post
Bonobo May 2013 OP
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #1
Bonobo May 2013 #2
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #3
Bonobo May 2013 #4
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #5
Bonobo May 2013 #8
Major Nikon May 2013 #10
Gore1FL May 2013 #6
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #7
Gore1FL May 2013 #11
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #12
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #13
Gore1FL May 2013 #14
Major Nikon May 2013 #9
datasuspect May 2013 #15
ProudToBeBlueInRhody May 2013 #16
Major Nikon May 2013 #18
Major Nikon May 2013 #19
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #20
Major Nikon May 2013 #21
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #32
Major Nikon May 2013 #33
opiate69 May 2013 #35
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #36
redqueen May 2013 #22
Major Nikon May 2013 #24
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #25
Major Nikon May 2013 #26
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #27
opiate69 May 2013 #28
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #29
opiate69 May 2013 #30
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #31
opiate69 May 2013 #34
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #37
opiate69 May 2013 #38
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #40
redqueen May 2013 #39
Major Nikon May 2013 #44
redqueen May 2013 #45
Major Nikon May 2013 #50
redqueen May 2013 #51
Major Nikon May 2013 #63
lumberjack_jeff May 2013 #41
redqueen May 2013 #42
Major Nikon May 2013 #46
redqueen May 2013 #47
Major Nikon May 2013 #48
redqueen May 2013 #49
Major Nikon May 2013 #54
redqueen May 2013 #55
opiate69 May 2013 #59
redqueen May 2013 #62
opiate69 May 2013 #71
Major Nikon May 2013 #79
opiate69 May 2013 #82
Major Nikon May 2013 #67
Bonobo May 2013 #52
opiate69 May 2013 #53
redqueen May 2013 #57
opiate69 May 2013 #61
redqueen May 2013 #66
Bonobo May 2013 #68
redqueen May 2013 #70
opiate69 May 2013 #72
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #43
redqueen May 2013 #56
Bonobo May 2013 #58
redqueen May 2013 #60
LineLineLineLineLineLineLineLineReply Please don't tell me what I WANT to hear.
Bonobo May 2013 #65
Major Nikon May 2013 #76
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #64
redqueen May 2013 #69
Bonobo May 2013 #73
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #74
Major Nikon May 2013 #75
lumberjack_jeff May 2013 #80
opiate69 Jun 2013 #92
lumberjack_jeff May 2013 #17
galileoreloaded May 2013 #23
Bonobo May 2013 #77
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #83
Major Nikon May 2013 #84
Bonobo May 2013 #85
Warren DeMontague May 2013 #86
Gore1FL May 2013 #87
Major Nikon May 2013 #88
Bonobo May 2013 #78
Major Nikon May 2013 #81
nomorenomore08 May 2013 #89
Bonobo May 2013 #90
nomorenomore08 May 2013 #91
LanternWaste Oct 2017 #93
Please login to view edit histories.