What would you have done? 03-05-21 UPDATE. [View all]

Just imagine ... you’re a highly-educated, pampered, aristocratic hobbit living in a manor in the Shire, and you discover that your eccentric uncle, who up and disappeared one day, also left you all of his property and dropped on the floor, on his way out, ... a ring. It’s a simple ring with no markings, but it exudes power and magic. It’s just sitting there on your floor. Naturally, you pick it up.

Then, along comes a wizard ... an ancient, mysterious being and a “friend” of yours (if wizards have friends), and this dude tells you that what you’re holding is actually THE ONE RING, forged by Sauron in the depths of Mount Doom ... the one ring that was designed to bind the other rings to itself and control all the free races of Middle Earth. You hold in your hand the ultimate weapon of mass destruction.

What’s worse, this obnoxious wizard tells you that Sauron knows that the ring is in the Shire and that it’s in the custody of a Baggins! He’s coming for it now! You and all you love are in positive, immanent danger because of this ring.

What would you do?

Well, naturally, you would want to give it away. You’re not interested in ultimate power. You’re far more interested in good food and pipe weed. You might say to the wizard, “Take it. You must take it.” You would hold out your hand. You would reach for the wizard with all your might. When the wizard protested, “No! I can not take it!,” you might reach out even further toward him, stretching toward him and desperately pleading ... “You MUST take this ring!”

And then ... BLAM. You might hit the floor and wake up from your dream in significant pain. Your daughter might have been watching “Fellowship of the Ring,” and you might have been sleeping, sitting upright, again, at the end of your bed. You WERE watching the movie, you might swear. You just dozed off.

In addition, you might have just dislocated your shoulder pretty badly. You may also have cracked a rib. Today, 2 days after the incident, I still have very limited use of my right arm and a highly limited range of motion, but I can type. The shoulder is going to heal. The rib, on the other hand, is a real bear. It sucks when it hurts to breathe. Sleeping on it is nearly impossible. Getting dressed is a nightmare. Driving is completely out of the question.

I am trying to stay ahead of the pain with over-the-counter meds, and I remain functional, but the rib is going to take a while to heal.




Damn wizard! Why wouldn’t he just take the stupid ring?



-Laelth