General Discussion

Tikki

(14,556 posts)

53. Talk to your parents about having a "Discovery Day" at their home...

Sat Jun 9, 2012, 12:14 PM

Jun 2012

Last edited Sun Jun 10, 2012, 12:09 PM - Edit history (1)

Maybe other seniors in the neighborhood could contribute an item, also.
Arrange all items on a table with a simple name tag and a blurb from a book or the nets on what
each item is. Make it a learning experience for both girls.
Let Fred know this is the best way to do this and he should deliver these found
items personally to grandma and grandpa and then pick a future date and invite
others...like the parents, also to Discovery Day...if Fred and Wilma don't show up
then I suspect they have issues beyond what any child needs to deal with.

Tikki

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A man keeps giving small presents to my 5-year-old daughter, and it's freaking me out. [View all] Liberal_in_LA Jun 2012 OP

Your child is your #1 priority sarisataka Jun 2012 #1

I agree with everything you've said Number23 Jun 2012 #69

It's not appropriate for him to give her gifts. Tell him and others that it's a rule: no presents! SharonAnn Jun 2012 #123

Sadly today one never knows. SoutherDem Jun 2012 #2

You need a woman to accompany to you to the bookstore - a reverse of that sharia stuff Liberal_in_LA Jun 2012 #3

Better yet I go to Barnes & Noble SoutherDem Jun 2012 #19

You can buy gifts for your nieces--this old guy is NO RELATION to the little girl. MADem Jun 2012 #7

The OP said a bookstore did not allow men to go to the children's area SoutherDem Jun 2012 #18

Here's what I think. MADem Jun 2012 #47

I would bet good money that's what was going on with the old guy kicked out Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #72

Yes, you got it in one. That's it precisely. MADem Jun 2012 #74

The old guy in the bookstore was sitting on the floor in the children's area, talking on the phone. redqueen Jun 2012 #107

This thread reeks of paranoia... Cave_Johnson Jun 2012 #94

No, it reeks of naivete.. pipoman Jun 2012 #99

No--I think it reeks of reality. There are a lot of perverts out there. Twenty years ago it MADem Jun 2012 #104

+1 redqueen Jun 2012 #108

There have been a rash of stories in the past 10 years or more 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #111

Well, you go on ahead and put aside your instincts, now. MADem Jun 2012 #112

Ah the old "gut reaction" 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #113

Well, you're free to extrapolate your own experience, but that's not mine. MADem Jun 2012 #121

" If your gut feeds you racism and sexism, that's on you." That's an . . . interesting spn 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #131

Complete nonsense pipoman Jun 2012 #37

Well, yes it did happen when I was a kid SoutherDem Jun 2012 #50

It is different pipoman Jun 2012 #92

Yes the OP does not give a lot of detail SoutherDem Jun 2012 #109

Yes, there are more pervs today. If only because there are more people. Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #82

Disagree--I think there were proportionally just as many pervs in the past, raccoon Jun 2012 #90

I don't use anecdotes as substitutes for facts. If you use anecdotes, Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #93

There are many more REPORTED cases of child abuse and molestation than raccoon Jun 2012 #96

Fact: There are more people in the country now than 50 years ago. Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #125

Fact: the terms "date rape" and "acquaintance rape" didn't exist about 40 years ago. raccoon Jun 2012 #141

No.. pipoman Jun 2012 #97

I didn't realize there were so many people in denial about this issue. Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #128

And I didn't realize pipoman Jun 2012 #134

You are ridiculously oversimplifying things 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #135

Logical fallacy Dash87 Jun 2012 #115

You can "think" whatever you want are the reasons. That's not a fact. Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #127

There are more cases of workplace discrimination based on race/gender today in the 50s. 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #116

I never said we should strive to go back in time. Reading skills are important. nt Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #126

No, you just made the absurd claim that because there are more cases now that means 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #130

Great post, and that applies also to rape, incest, child beating, raccoon Jun 2012 #89

I remember back in the 1970's pipoman Jun 2012 #95

I would be very concerned and would be having conversation with your parents about this. Better teddy51 Jun 2012 #4

I think those parents should trust their gut. When I go with mine, I'm never wrong. When I ignore MADem Jun 2012 #5

your gif is awesome..by the way Liberal_in_LA Jun 2012 #6

Thanks--he looks like a cat we had for over two decades. MADem Jun 2012 #9

agreed. Go with your gut. magical thyme Jun 2012 #33

Bush went with his GUT FEELINGS also. n-t Logical Jun 2012 #44

His gut was raddled by alcohol, though! It's not the same! nt MADem Jun 2012 #45

Bush was a sociopath who didn't have feelings of concern. riderinthestorm Jun 2012 #59

I agree that the parents should trust their gut instincts. Gormy Cuss Jun 2012 #51

Once again, you and I are on the same page Number23 Jun 2012 #70

+1,000 nt MADem Jun 2012 #75

I think the reason ohheckyeah Jun 2012 #8

I wouldn't hesitate to say something! Mom-alarm-bells are a warning riderinthestorm Jun 2012 #10

that particular issue - this women has genuine reasons to restrict access to her daughter RainDog Jun 2012 #11

Warn your parents!!! Rosa Luxemburg Jun 2012 #12

It could be innocent - it could be something else aint_no_life_nowhere Jun 2012 #13

No harm in following your instincts on this sort of thing. JDPriestly Jun 2012 #14

I agree that this sounds like grooming XemaSab Jun 2012 #15

I agree. laundry_queen Jun 2012 #21

Ok fine but please don't generalize about grandparents. They are no more inattentive than parents yellowcanine Jun 2012 #42

Err on the side of caution. Zanzoobar Jun 2012 #16

She's hyperventilating over a seashell? pscot Jun 2012 #17

If Maurice Chevalier were singing this song today, Art_from_Ark Jun 2012 #31

Now what if one were to drive around town blasting this little diddy MattBaggins Jun 2012 #41

Just a couple of years ago, my granddaughters' ballet recital featured them dancing to CTyankee Jun 2012 #52

Gigi was about grooming a 15 year old girl for prostitution. aquart Jun 2012 #88

No, didn't sound that way to me.. pipoman Jun 2012 #38

Mass hysteria pscot Jun 2012 #55

I am an old fart..no ageism...talk about seeing things not there.. pipoman Jun 2012 #64

I find it odd that the gifts are not for both children. That also sends alarms for me. I disagree IndyJones Jun 2012 #20

You give a shell to a two-year-old, Art_from_Ark Jun 2012 #26

I have three kids and they didn't put shells in their mouths. IndyJones Jun 2012 #27

I've known 2-year-olds who would put anything and everything in their mouths Art_from_Ark Jun 2012 #32

Okay, and back to the OP... IndyJones Jun 2012 #63

better safe than sorry danadevin85 Jun 2012 #22

If the parents ever let the kid out of their sight, they are not doing their job. xfundy Jun 2012 #23

it simply is not appropriate, with or without your uneasy feelings Skittles Jun 2012 #24

You're absolutely correct. I wouldn't give a child a gift without first asking the parents. IndyJones Jun 2012 #28

A rock, a feather, a shell. enlightenment Jun 2012 #29

"Not precisely the crown jewels." No but gifts a 5 year old would appreciate more than jewels. yellowcanine Jun 2012 #43

A "public letter that tries and convicts?" It's an anonymous letter to an advice columnist. MADem Jun 2012 #54

Thank you. Some of the responses to this have been bizarre Number23 Jun 2012 #71

When both parents smell a rat, you gotta sit up and take notice. MADem Jun 2012 #76

the best comment in the whole thread Sea-Dog Jun 2012 #67

Prudie's an idiot. Prometheus Bound Jun 2012 #25

Agree completely.. pipoman Jun 2012 #101

This message was self-deleted by its author markpkessinger Jun 2012 #129

Is the reason she and her hubby are "totally creeped out" because of the gifts? Or is it Happyhippychick Jun 2012 #30

We have a pesky sixth sense, that tingle on our necks, for a reason justiceischeap Jun 2012 #34

I disagree with Prudence's response on this one. The parents should listen to their instincts. yardwork Jun 2012 #35

At a Loss and her husband are both lunatics alcibiades_mystery Jun 2012 #36

Only a lunitic would make such a statement pipoman Jun 2012 #40

I suspect her suspicion is less about the gifts pipoman Jun 2012 #39

Exactly. Read Protecting the Gift by Gavin De Becker. Butterbean Jun 2012 #46

I believe that is the key.. pipoman Jun 2012 #48

If it was me Aerows Jun 2012 #49

Talk to your parents about having a "Discovery Day" at their home... Tikki Jun 2012 #53

My gut feeling is that the parents are overreacting. Comrade Grumpy Jun 2012 #56

Maybe when pipoman Jun 2012 #66

It is simply not appropriate to give gifts to minor children in these cases. SharonAnn Jun 2012 #122

Flashing RED light Nancy Waterman Jun 2012 #57

Remind me to always yell at the kids... BiggJawn Jun 2012 #58

I wouldn't use the word "fuck" though 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #60

I had a discussion with an ex boyfriend about helping a child in distress, say a lost child. Quantess Jun 2012 #61

Men will always be a sexual suspect in such circumstances marshall Jun 2012 #68

Right, because we're MEN, y'know? And we always think with our dicks, y'know? BiggJawn Jun 2012 #73

Your church is full of morons. That school is full of idiots, too. MADem Jun 2012 #77

that show "what would you do" put a lost child on the street, crying to people "I'm lost" Liberal_in_LA Jun 2012 #78

He is a super nice guy, and very helpful in general. More considerate than most! Quantess Jun 2012 #80

Listen to your warning sirens. revolution breeze Jun 2012 #62

its a sad world when any and all acts of kindness is looked upon as sinister and insidious Sea-Dog Jun 2012 #65

agreed n/t Liberal_in_LA Jun 2012 #79

+1 sarcasmo Jun 2012 #81

It's not kindness to give a gift to one child & leave the other out. Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #83

i wouldn't give a 2 year old a shell would you? Sea-Dog Jun 2012 #85

Why would you single out one of the many gifts the neighbor brought/bought the child? Honeycombe8 Jun 2012 #87

i wouldn't hand a feather or a rock to a 2 year old either would you? Sea-Dog Jun 2012 #98

This thread just shows how badly we've stereotyped men in this society.... eek MD Jun 2012 #84

Back when I was a kid XanaDUer Jun 2012 #91

What if this guy pipoman Jun 2012 #138

Like not accepting gifts from strangers? pipoman Jun 2012 #100

So I take it you won't let your kids eat candy on Halloween? eek MD Jun 2012 #133

We always took our kids to neighborhoods pipoman Jun 2012 #136

"gut instincts" eek MD Jun 2012 #137

Or it may save her child's life or innocence.. pipoman Jun 2012 #139

Your critique of my parenting abilities as detrimental is noted...and rejected... eek MD Jun 2012 #140

If this person were a woman it would be a story about the nice woman 4th law of robotics Jun 2012 #110

We're a very stereotyped society Dash87 Jun 2012 #117

Isn't that called "grooming behavior"? aquart Jun 2012 #86

Not necessarily wrong. Especially since the gifts are things like feathers and rocks. alphafemale Jun 2012 #102

holy shit...one paragraph off a little known advice column and a mob jury gets formed tjwash Jun 2012 #103

Tell your parent under no circumstances are your girls allowed to be alone with the neighbors. That Pisces Jun 2012 #105

Well, this could be a cause for concern or just some nice old folks. MineralMan Jun 2012 #106

There's not enough context, but always trust your instincts. Dash87 Jun 2012 #114

I have subscribed to the theory that red flags go up for a reason HillWilliam Jun 2012 #118

Have a little more insight. Life Long Dem Jun 2012 #119

the fact something is given to on exclusively, alone, would have me saying, knock it the fuck off seabeyond Jun 2012 #120

Read this Book: Mira Jun 2012 #124

As for the bookstore thing . . . markpkessinger Jun 2012 #132

Amen, brother! SaB2012 Jun 2012 #145

Wow. It's a shame people treat men this way, especially on DU cbdo2007 Jun 2012 #142

He only gives balloons to one child in particular, at the expense of all others...? LanternWaste Jun 2012 #148

I wasn't making a direct comparison....you're missing the point. cbdo2007 Jun 2012 #149

Back in my hometown SaB2012 Jun 2012 #143

there's a big difference between a 5 year old and a 2 year old.... cbdo2007 Jun 2012 #147

To everyone calling this "grooming" SaB2012 Jun 2012 #144

More often than not, I'll give a mom any benefit of the doubt LanternWaste Jun 2012 #146