General Discussion

KitSileya

(4,035 posts)

94. In my experience, people of opposite views on things, fade from my social life...

Sat Sep 28, 2013, 10:00 AM

Sep 2013

Not necessarily political views, but I have found that with people whose view on punctuality differs radically from mine, I simply end up not suggesting things we can do together. For me, the stress of having to wait 10, 20, 30 minutes because they don't care about being punctual is so great that i cannot enjoy what we had planned on doing. Say we are doing something time sensitive, like going to a movie - for me, having to wait and maybe disturb the people in the theater that were there on time, causes such a stress reaction, I am wrecked for days afterwards. Therefore, I simply do not become friends with certain people. We may have mutual friends, many mutual friends, in fact, but I do not make any friendship overtures towards them at all.

I imagine many feel the same way about Republicans. I have republican friends, but those are Eisenhower republicans, who are willing to listen in discussions, and who have demonstrated their willingness to change their minds when confronted with facts. In other words, they're the kind of republicans excoriated as RINOs in the current party. If they had been the type to close their ears, or who reverted back to the Beck/Hannity/Limbaugh talking points when my back was turned, I would have had a problem with being as close friends with them as I am.

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I can not have a friend who is a Republican.. [View all] busterbrown Sep 2013 OP

I try to be up front to everyone and I do have Republican friends but it's hard. Lint Head Sep 2013 #1

Especially when they make the dumb jokes about Obama. busterbrown Sep 2013 #2

Yep. I have problems when I'm around my sister. She's married to a Republican Lint Head Sep 2013 #4

Or bash the ACA brush Sep 2013 #88

There was a time when keeping up with current events meant treestar Sep 2013 #100

If that's the criteria - you'll have to dump about half of your dem friends, Ms. Toad Sep 2013 #131

You could be right . . . brush Sep 2013 #164

I hope you're right. Ms. Toad Sep 2013 #172

Out of curiosity, Jenoch Sep 2013 #187

I don't ask my acquaintences what their political affiliations are. cherokeeprogressive Sep 2013 #3

That's, well, one way to look at it Orrex Sep 2013 #7

I know many, MANY conservatives and Republicans who are impressive examples of empathy, Common Sense Party Sep 2013 #9

One's political views aren't the be-all and end-all, sure. Orrex Sep 2013 #12

That I can understand. Common Sense Party Sep 2013 #14

There's a "self-applied label", and there's a label one applies to a political affiliation... cherokeeprogressive Sep 2013 #24

It's deliberately obtuse to fixate on the hypothetical, hyperbolic example Orrex Sep 2013 #83

Yes I proudly do. busterbrown Sep 2013 #8

You are one hell of a good person madokie Sep 2013 #53

Today, you don't have to ask, it seeps right out of them via the blind accusations they make bluestate10 Sep 2013 #57

Friendship transcends politics XOKCowboy Sep 2013 #65

That's a thought but . . . brush Sep 2013 #91

I think it shows they're both more about the buzz than the policies caraher Sep 2013 #103

You nailed it brush Sep 2013 #113

I've noticed... CANDO Sep 2013 #97

I don't inquire into political positions with acquaintances, but some people shove it in your face. Shrike47 Sep 2013 #105

Does politics rule my life? Unfortunately. As a gay person, just being alive is a political act. Sanddog42 Sep 2013 #122

"Just being alive is a political act," very wise and elequent words. kairos12 Sep 2013 #185

+1 grantcart Sep 2013 #125

One of my best friends is yuiyoshida Sep 2013 #5

I don’t get it.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #10

No...we been friends for years... yuiyoshida Sep 2013 #13

Got it!!! busterbrown Sep 2013 #15

I can't be friends with people who don't share my basic values. LumosMaxima Sep 2013 #6

Could you ever maintain a close relationship with a child who becomes a Republican? Common Sense Party Sep 2013 #11

Absolutely not!! busterbrown Sep 2013 #18

In which case, you have a moral obligation not to have children, I fear. N.T. Donald Ian Rankin Sep 2013 #70

If a child of mine turns out to be one who has no compassion or empathy. And simply does not busterbrown Sep 2013 #79

I agree babydollhead Sep 2013 #90

Sometimes a lack pipi_k Sep 2013 #135

Which is a perfectly OK position, provided that you don't choose to have children. Donald Ian Rankin Sep 2013 #150

Totally pipi_k Sep 2013 #169

I think it's less rare than you'd think, because of post-natal depression. Donald Ian Rankin Sep 2013 #170

Yah... pipi_k Sep 2013 #182

I can, and do. Some issues make it tough. Lucinda Sep 2013 #16

I have friends who are republicans Cali_Democrat Sep 2013 #17

Well if you come out on top. Then they might be listening..Unusual. busterbrown Sep 2013 #19

Well I'm sure they think they come out on top Cali_Democrat Sep 2013 #20

I had to quit drinking..... busterbrown Sep 2013 #23

Sounds boring... Decaffeinated Sep 2013 #21

Friends with musicians, actors ( I am neither) authors etc. busterbrown Sep 2013 #27

No.. I think only associating with ideological clones of yourself is dull... Decaffeinated Sep 2013 #34

And you sit back and just have a wonderful couple of drinks with those.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #41

I give em one back about Bush... Decaffeinated Sep 2013 #48

That's not what the OP said treestar Sep 2013 #62

Is there such a thing left as a moderate republican? brush Sep 2013 #95

I have lots of friends who are Republicans AgingAmerican Sep 2013 #22

Well, it’s a free country. busterbrown Sep 2013 #25

LOL AgingAmerican Sep 2013 #30

Most of them are.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #31

You should get out more... Decaffeinated Sep 2013 #35

Thats a load of tripe AgingAmerican Sep 2013 #37

So you are saying that they are”cluless” of what partly they are responsible for..And a 3rd of these busterbrown Sep 2013 #71

I agree with you. brush Sep 2013 #96

Yes, they are clueless AgingAmerican Sep 2013 #107

I can, just the same as I could atheists, muslims, etc The Straight Story Sep 2013 #26

Disagree..... busterbrown Sep 2013 #29

Small minded thinking The Straight Story Sep 2013 #33

We are talking about a new breed of Republican which has little resemblance to the Repubs. of 20 busterbrown Sep 2013 #40

I try not to assume that people who see the world differently than I do are evil (or even wrong) Recursion Sep 2013 #28

It isn't that they see the world differently, their views come out as vile beliefs and hatreds. bluestate10 Sep 2013 #58

There is a need for at least two parties what passes for Republicans today is a fringe. gordianot Sep 2013 #32

What does a moderate republican bring to the table with regards to today’s political reality?. busterbrown Sep 2013 #38

Ask Obama AgingAmerican Sep 2013 #45

Wrong, and myopic. President Obama's core values that he displays via actions scream Democrat bluestate10 Sep 2013 #59

politics Niceguy1 Sep 2013 #36

When lives depend on what bills will pass and what bills won’t pass. busterbrown Sep 2013 #66

and arguing over it Niceguy1 Sep 2013 #67

Generally speaking, I can't be close friends with republicans RedCappedBandit Sep 2013 #39

So far, Jamaal510 Sep 2013 #42

I’m not saying I’m right..but how can you be a friend with one who denies climate change? busterbrown Sep 2013 #43

And I have friends who are Yankees fans. King_Klonopin Sep 2013 #44

I really don't give a f*** LittleBlue Sep 2013 #46

So you can not discuss the thousands of kids and tens of thousands of people who go to bed hungry busterbrown Sep 2013 #74

Braindead talking points from you LittleBlue Sep 2013 #129

I'm lucky that way.. All my family and friends are into reality and care Cha Sep 2013 #47

Most of the ones I know are just stuck on a bad team. gulliver Sep 2013 #49

Agree 100% sure I know Pubs many through work but I only interact with them for work purposes only FUMCSDLCBDPOS Sep 2013 #50

I learned a long time ago friends don't stab you in the back. Impossible B Calm Sep 2013 #51

Try having parents-in-law who are Republicans. Laelth Sep 2013 #52

I'm with you, BB! Anyone who would identify themselves with the things that today's Dark n Stormy Knight Sep 2013 #54

I agree with you. I don't understand the view put forward by some that dealing with only bluestate10 Sep 2013 #63

I remember when I went to work somewhere many years ago - the person who ostensibly had the most in Douglas Carpenter Sep 2013 #55

Neither can I. Anyone that still identifies with that party is a bad person, IMO. bluestate10 Sep 2013 #56

I think it all depends Shankapotomus Sep 2013 #60

Depends on the Republican treestar Sep 2013 #61

Eisenhower type republicans have been mostly chased out of that party. The few that are bluestate10 Sep 2013 #64

Liberals can be obnoxious and vain, not humble etc, However if their votes remain on our side of the busterbrown Sep 2013 #68

The first thing that came to mind when I read your post Skidmore Sep 2013 #69

sorry buddy....When some “don’t" believe" that we should be looking after everybody’s innate busterbrown Sep 2013 #75

Then you lose opportunities to Skidmore Sep 2013 #78

That is a good point too treestar Sep 2013 #99

When people push their agenda on simply on hate. There is no such thing as reason.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #110

I've met a few in life that responded to patient Skidmore Sep 2013 #132

Great strategy! pipi_k Sep 2013 #148

Trouble when you marry into a family of them. Overall, I find most republicans Laura PourMeADrink Sep 2013 #72

It must suck going around wondering who's in what political party. Inkfreak Sep 2013 #73

Not me.. If a guy makes a low keyed racial joke about Obama and then tags on a few “they should pull busterbrown Sep 2013 #76

I can't imagine only being friends with people who think exactly like I do. GreenEyedLefty Sep 2013 #77

Political views (votes) for not helping ones who are suffering due to lack of health coverage are busterbrown Sep 2013 #82

If you have been able to do so.You should post some of your experiences. busterbrown Sep 2013 #114

Life's too short for that BKH70041 Sep 2013 #80

I can only have very superficial relationships with them, if we don't talk politics. MoonRiver Sep 2013 #81

I agree 100% RandiFan1290 Sep 2013 #84

Would you suggest I get divorced? Seeking Serenity Sep 2013 #85

Talk to James Carvel. busterbrown Sep 2013 #112

Carville and Matalin seem to make it work Seeking Serenity Sep 2013 #154

All about the money.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #202

So, in your opinion, they cannot Seeking Serenity Sep 2013 #205

I don't have any republican friends. BlueToTheBone Sep 2013 #86

I tend to look down on people who are too into politics of any stripe. nt Romulox Sep 2013 #87

In my opinion one can never be too into politics when they are striving to save people’s lives busterbrown Sep 2013 #117

Just curious... pipi_k Sep 2013 #147

I hear the precise same thing about religion... for the precise same reasons. LanternWaste Sep 2013 #210

Because of where I live in Texas Redford Sep 2013 #89

I have plenty of friends that are republicans etherealtruth Sep 2013 #92

I bet every one of your Republican friends agree with Congress’s decision to cut billions out busterbrown Sep 2013 #118

Actually, the one republican friend I discussed this with ... etherealtruth Sep 2013 #137

Listen I love hearing these stories. busterbrown Sep 2013 #138

Yes most are etherealtruth Sep 2013 #139

I feel differently. First off, you can't pick your relatives, and some of the people LaydeeBug Sep 2013 #93

Very difficult to change opinions based on the lies of hate talk radio and Fox.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #120

Oh it is very difficult to be sure, and sometimes frustrating, but never say never LaydeeBug Sep 2013 #157

In my experience, people of opposite views on things, fade from my social life... KitSileya Sep 2013 #94

That's what's happening to me Populist_Prole Sep 2013 #115

I agree... Focusing on the spread of Communism and limiting discretionary spending is not half as busterbrown Sep 2013 #121

It depends on how rabid they are. And whether they're mean people or just clueless. OnionPatch Sep 2013 #98

not close friends madrchsod Sep 2013 #101

My life is not limited to politics. I have friends who are Republicans and Conservatives.... Agnosticsherbet Sep 2013 #102

Not only do I have friends who are Republicans, LWolf Sep 2013 #104

Wonderful post. NCTraveler Sep 2013 #111

Well I’ll admit this to you.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #123

You're hate doesn't hurt them, LWolf Sep 2013 #141

Stop being Naive. busterbrown Sep 2013 #174

Please understand LWolf Sep 2013 #179

Not that it needs saying again... pipi_k Sep 2013 #145

I said I was wrong for using the word hate... busterbrown Sep 2013 #175

Not in the OP, but... pipi_k Sep 2013 #181

great post LWolf. liberal_at_heart Sep 2013 #128

I believe your friends are richer for knowing you. Great post. (nt) Inkfreak Sep 2013 #156

best post of the Niceguy1 Sep 2013 #171

Once again as admitted earlier. busterbrown Sep 2013 #176

Thank you for the fresh air. Eom yawnmaster Sep 2013 #214

The love my repub mom and I have for each other trumps it all... cynatnite Sep 2013 #106

As it should! etherealtruth Sep 2013 #140

Why? Friends and relatives who are Republican are an educational opportunity, if you are patient, pnwmom Sep 2013 #108

Please post one of your success stories one day. busterbrown Sep 2013 #124

One of my ex-Republican friends is a fervent supporter of Obamacare now. pnwmom Sep 2013 #136

I was married to A Republican etherealtruth Sep 2013 #146

One of the most compassionate and giving person I know is a conservative. NCTraveler Sep 2013 #109

No republican friends at all. Plenty of acquaintances as most people out here are conservative Egalitarian Thug Sep 2013 #116

I went to a republican's birth day party yesterday. It is someone my husband became friends with liberal_at_heart Sep 2013 #119

Then you will be unlikely to influence any. grantcart Sep 2013 #126

One cannot influence hate.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #127

Untrue. Why do you think some conservatives have changed their minds on things like liberal_at_heart Sep 2013 #130

++ Sanddog42 Sep 2013 #134

I can. Sanddog42 Sep 2013 #133

When first met my girlfriend she identified as a Republican Arcanetrance Sep 2013 #142

That's too bad, I think you are missing some good people. kiva Sep 2013 #143

No, I stated what I believed in my Discussion thread. busterbrown Sep 2013 #149

i have friends who are reTHUGS, but i NEVER discuss politics with them spanone Sep 2013 #144

I keep very civil relationships going with a few of them Warpy Sep 2013 #151

My father was married to a republican and is now dating another republican. MrsKirkley Sep 2013 #152

When your in love and the passion is there. It works until it doesn’t.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #153

Like really, really poor grammar? LanternWaste Sep 2013 #212

I used to be able to, but now Republicans geek tragedy Sep 2013 #155

How does that work? Sissyk Sep 2013 #158

Most of the time when people get together for a dinner, lunch or a barbecue the subject of politics busterbrown Sep 2013 #159

Thanks for the reply! Sissyk Sep 2013 #166

I know some people billh58 Sep 2013 #160

Lifelong friends who turn out to be Repubs, yes. Make new friends who are Repubs, no. n/t Blaukraut Sep 2013 #161

Have relatives and friends who are Republicans. We do not kiranon Sep 2013 #162

And yet they don’t seem to worry a bit about circumstances which could also destroy their lives..... busterbrown Sep 2013 #163

I used to feel that way graywarrior Sep 2013 #165

They usually are in that kind of a situation.. In fact most people are. busterbrown Sep 2013 #167

Guess I'm just too tired to hate people graywarrior Sep 2013 #168

Nope. I feel the same. nt truebluegreen Sep 2013 #173

I feel pretty much 180 degrees differently OmahaBlueDog Sep 2013 #177

How can you get past the politics of hate and destruction. busterbrown Sep 2013 #178

The same way that you can be posting on a political site with an NFL logo as your avatar OmahaBlueDog Sep 2013 #206

I haven't reached that point Harmony Blue Sep 2013 #180

:) lonestarnot Sep 2013 #183

if I know someone has different beliefs than me melm00se Sep 2013 #184

Petty? busterbrown Sep 2013 #188

To be fair Sanddog42 Sep 2013 #189

Wow.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #190

Why would I be speaking in code about the beliefs of other people? Sanddog42 Sep 2013 #195

I think everything that republican’s say is in code. busterbrown Sep 2013 #198

I'm not a Republican Sanddog42 Sep 2013 #201

Does every conversation melm00se Sep 2013 #203

With me, family transcends politics. I have republican relatives and stil love them. But on AlinPA Sep 2013 #186

I feel the same. Iggo Sep 2013 #191

Have you read some of the replies on this thread. busterbrown Sep 2013 #192

I know right? Bigots are people, too, you lonely person! Iggo Sep 2013 #209

"Fuck those motherfuckers." sagat Sep 2013 #200

I've got a good friend in Sparta NC who votes Republican. dipsydoodle Sep 2013 #193

Good for you. busterbrown Sep 2013 #194

The bottom line for me is, friends are people I trust, and I have learned to never, ever, Zorra Sep 2013 #196

I'm there too busterbrown. Greybnk48 Sep 2013 #197

Thanks for that. Sometimes I forget that there are people like that out there.. busterbrown Sep 2013 #199

I'm sure there's many a Republican sighing with relief telclaven Sep 2013 #204

Recall that they are also our fellow victims. n/t Orsino Sep 2013 #207

Family and friends LostOne4Ever Sep 2013 #208

I do predicate my friendships on the integrity and the character of the individual. LanternWaste Sep 2013 #211

I have many Republican Friends el_bryanto Sep 2013 #213