General Discussion

Bonobo

(29,257 posts)

7. Interesting...

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 02:04 AM

Nov 2012

Why was that not a big deal to you and what does that imply about the different way that men treat their sexuality? You suggest this is a major key to understanding this issue and I find that intriguing.

Does it relate to the way women are conditioned to "protect" their sexual purity and stop invasion and therefore their sexual organs have value whereas men are taught to make a conquest and that, as a result, their sexual organs have not innate value?

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No! For men, rape is NOT the default. [View all] Bonobo Nov 2012 OP

We must be reminded RobertEarl Nov 2012 #1

"the default rape creatures that they are" flvegan Nov 2012 #2

Ummm, you snatched that quote out of context, 5gan... Bonobo Nov 2012 #9

Ummm, no I didn't. flvegan Nov 2012 #22

Sorry, I have no idea what you are saying. Bonobo Nov 2012 #23

there are many cultural examples of men being taught the opposite values G_j Nov 2012 #3

Why is it then that despite watching countless violent television shows, playing Arkana Nov 2012 #69

lucky you G_j Nov 2012 #73

I don't dispute that they may have an effect on young minds. Arkana Nov 2012 #74

agreed, the buck stops at the parents G_j Nov 2012 #77

I think the culture introduces the idea later in adolescence Prism Nov 2012 #4

Interesting... Bonobo Nov 2012 #7

I think you've touched upon it. Prism Nov 2012 #16

That is an interesting observation LittleBlue Nov 2012 #66

you really think about the beginning of time, they had the brain power and the knowledge to know seabeyond Nov 2012 #70

Just an excuse. Just like so many rationalizations so many of us use to excuse ourselves Egalitarian Thug Nov 2012 #40

I think that's part of it. The rationalization Prism Nov 2012 #51

drunk sex hfojvt Nov 2012 #46

Men can't get pregnant Prism Nov 2012 #52

but logically there is a consideration hfojvt Nov 2012 #53

A girl did that to me once. And I statuatorially raped her. ieoeja Nov 2012 #78

+1. HiPointDem Nov 2012 #5

it doesn't matter how many threads people make liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #6

Men's biggest fear is that women will laugh at them. Women's biggest fear is that men will kill them Sadiedog Nov 2012 #8

Wow. That is haunting. liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #10

Me too - and I'm a man. dchill Nov 2012 #28

Apparently Margaret Atwood relayed that quote. Bonobo Nov 2012 #11

Thank you, I am glad to know who said it originally. Sadiedog Nov 2012 #12

Just so you know, men also fear being killed by other men. Bonobo Nov 2012 #13

Sad! Sadiedog Nov 2012 #18

As a man Berserker Nov 2012 #24

We're not all giant vikings... nt Bonobo Nov 2012 #26

"they go through their life in fear of us" hfojvt Nov 2012 #42

It's a generalization, i.e. overly broad by its nature. I don't necessarily agree *or* disagree. nomorenomore08 Nov 2012 #43

there is the generalization hfojvt Nov 2012 #45

Wrong. Completely, utterly wrong. nt redqueen Nov 2012 #50

in what way? hfojvt Nov 2012 #57

It isn't big things, like whether or not to get married gollygee Nov 2012 #75

Which is why I am asked consistently by my LanternWaste Nov 2012 #54

they are .... hawt, for you, dontcha know. it means they want sex? nt seabeyond Nov 2012 #55

Darn tootin'! LanternWaste Nov 2012 #58

really. seabeyond Nov 2012 #60

because they are living their life in fear of you? hfojvt Nov 2012 #59

No... it doesn't. LanternWaste Nov 2012 #64

theya re at work. it is dark outside. they do not want to go outside by themselves. seabeyond Nov 2012 #65

That may be how you feel TrueBlueinCO Nov 2012 #67

Gavin de Becker, The Gift Of Fear LadyHawkAZ Nov 2012 #29

Yes! That is the book that I had heard the fear quote in! Thanks! NT Sadiedog Nov 2012 #79

THE GIFT OF FEAR by Gavin de Becker. nt raccoon Nov 2012 #47

Lorena Bobbit's husband would beg to differ (nt) Nye Bevan Nov 2012 #48

Some people do have to be taught not to abuse their kids leftstreet Nov 2012 #14

Because they were not raised right. Bonobo Nov 2012 #15

Agreed leftstreet Nov 2012 #17

Bonobo? really? NashvilleLefty Nov 2012 #19

I agree. Orangutans rape, bonobos don't. nt Bonobo Nov 2012 #27

Unbelievable that I have to post this link over and over again. We are so clueless about our culture Luminous Animal Nov 2012 #20

people don't want to believe humans can think this way liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #21

I am skeptical. Surveys are notorious for their ability to be manipulated. Bonobo Nov 2012 #25

I have been manipulated and coerced into having sex liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #30

That is never a nice thing. Bonobo Nov 2012 #31

what is physically coercive sex? Do you mean physically forcible sex? liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #32

I meant physically forcing, which is, of course rape itself. Bonobo Nov 2012 #33

I can't say whether I sustained the same level of trauma as someone who was forcibly raped liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #35

I am sorry for you hurt. Bonobo Nov 2012 #37

thank you liberal_at_heart Nov 2012 #38

Physical coercion can result in sex? Silly me, I thought that was rape! bettyellen Nov 2012 #34

Nope, not blurry in the least. See post #33. nt Bonobo Nov 2012 #36

I wonder if that is a common experience hfojvt Nov 2012 #44

for you... redqueen Nov 2012 #61

The tone nvme Nov 2012 #39

"If it involves traumatic(physical) or manipulative, coercive, or substance induced. redqueen Nov 2012 #63

For me this speaks to an even more fundamental question, of whether people are "naturally" more nomorenomore08 Nov 2012 #41

Some women and men do have to be taught not to abuse their children gollygee Nov 2012 #49

Makes sense, but then there are a few who apparently just don't know treestar Nov 2012 #56

or put an aspirin between your knees. come on. guys have known sayings about this shit. no means seabeyond Nov 2012 #62

You're Correct. It is NOT a Default Position ProfessorGAC Nov 2012 #68

I wasn't going to reply to this, but people seem to be taking it seriously... redqueen Nov 2012 #71

Yeah, I didn't know how to answer this because I couldn't think of how gollygee Nov 2012 #76

Predators always know marions ghost Nov 2012 #72