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Gabby Hayes

(289 posts)
101. Don't tell anyone,
Fri Nov 16, 2012, 05:15 AM
Nov 2012

but The OCIA (ObamaCare Intelligence Agency) actually launched the Texas secession petition in order to collect the names of subversives. The names and addresses are being stored in microchips on the back of Interstate Highway signs for use by UN troops. The sweep is set to begin on December 20. Petition signatories will be taken to FEMA camps where they will receive standard vaccinations against childhood diseases before being released.

K&R. +1000!!!!! nt. jschurchin Nov 2012 #1
Spelling of "Mediciare"? SharonAnn Nov 2012 #83
That's how it's spelled in Moran Generic Brad Nov 2012 #89
True dat. If at frist you don't secdee--- n/t eridani Nov 2012 #105
Good one! merrily Nov 2012 #119
Heh heh. F. Kafka Nov 2012 #2
Welcome to DU, F. Kafka! calimary Nov 2012 #97
Brilliant satire! BlueCaliDem Nov 2012 #3
not really. Satire needs to be fact based to be brilliant. cali Nov 2012 #16
Actually, news reports say Texas is one of the states listed in petitons to secede. dixiegrrrrl Nov 2012 #35
really. a bunch of nutfuckwad people is not the state. does not have the authority of the state cali Nov 2012 #41
Guess what Caretha Nov 2012 #67
LOL!! renie408 Nov 2012 #73
Some posters here said they've signed different states' petitions for a giggle. Indpndnt Nov 2012 #42
Really? For what possible reason? Orrex Nov 2012 #39
Texas hasn't in any shape, way or form, petitioned to secede. AlbertCat Nov 2012 #44
WTF?? Texas has not only petitioned, but they have the largest total of BlueCaliDem Nov 2012 #45
That is not Texas KatyMan Nov 2012 #59
I checked the Senate race results Doctor_J Nov 2012 #116
Yes it is KatyMan Nov 2012 #117
These people need to see this -- they have no idea... gateley Nov 2012 #4
EXACTLY! CakeGrrl Nov 2012 #49
Excellent. Cannikin Nov 2012 #5
Awesome!! oswaldactedalone Nov 2012 #6
K & R Scurrilous Nov 2012 #7
I Love It! Tarheel_Dem Nov 2012 #8
"P.S. Attached is your portion of the bill for the national debt" PatSeg Nov 2012 #9
Good one! Suggestion: Reword to "Attached is a bill for your portion of the national debt." Dark n Stormy Knight Nov 2012 #96
Yup! NoOtherMedicineNovel Nov 2012 #113
Texans will now understand they "Didn't Built That by themselves... Frustratedlady Nov 2012 #10
Brilliant! Le Taz Hot Nov 2012 #11
Instant classic! FailureToCommunicate Nov 2012 #12
Fuck that! How can I emigrate! Dustlawyer Nov 2012 #13
Having been there done that nadinbrzezinski Nov 2012 #18
We could deny KKK KARL his and forbid him to travel anywhere in the remaining US Liberalynn Nov 2012 #55
That s the upside. nadinbrzezinski Nov 2012 #56
Hmmm. You look furrin' to me. Ikonoklast Nov 2012 #21
There will be an amnesty period during which you can import yourself Doctor_J Nov 2012 #115
LMAOO K&R outsideworld Nov 2012 #14
LOL! But hang on... This could be a template for a real letter that would have to be sent Turborama Nov 2012 #15
Secessionist Coast Guard: coalition_unwilling Nov 2012 #85
LOL! love the Facebook name, too Turborama Nov 2012 #102
Zero States have petitioned to secede rasmus11 Nov 2012 #17
Welcome to DU, rasmus11! calimary Nov 2012 #98
Here is a slightly more lucid take on the matter: markbark Nov 2012 #19
Excellent read! thanks. hogwyld Nov 2012 #26
he is one smart guy....good writer, too. n/t BlancheSplanchnik Nov 2012 #28
What annoys me is this - Texas isn't all whacko nut jobs LynneSin Nov 2012 #20
Ditto... GTurck Nov 2012 #109
I hope it happens!!! santamargarita Nov 2012 #22
This isn't satire; it's a reality check. Anyone saying "let 'em go" needs to read this first. Bucky Nov 2012 #23
Snort! lunatica Nov 2012 #24
They should rely with a note that says the federal prosecutors in their area beyurslf Nov 2012 #25
I'm surprised that he didn't specifically mention NASA... BlueMan Votes Nov 2012 #27
So if Texas is a republic again, Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #29
Maybe so, KatyMan Nov 2012 #57
It's in East Texas starting at the Neches River. We got some large Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #62
perhaps you are correct.... KatyMan Nov 2012 #63
If you own Leon County Horse with no Name Nov 2012 #91
I know one asshole hates me. she is the District Clerk. Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #122
Excellent. SmittynMo Nov 2012 #30
41% of Texans voted for Obama in 2012. Careful not to brand an entire coalition_unwilling Nov 2012 #86
I brand no copatriots with my brush tavalon Nov 2012 #111
Aaaah, if only this were true. marsis Nov 2012 #31
Like the fit a six year old throws before he "runs away from home" or Texin Nov 2012 #32
Texas would be crippled without DOD spending. McCamy Taylor Nov 2012 #33
Oh, and one more thing, your colleges can no longer play football games in America. BlueStreak Nov 2012 #34
That settles it! TexasTowelie Nov 2012 #46
I thought you might see things my way. :) BlueStreak Nov 2012 #47
Though this is satire superpatriotman Nov 2012 #36
you are wrong KatyMan Nov 2012 #58
Just when I do a... AnneD Nov 2012 #68
Wrong...very wrong ashredux Nov 2012 #106
this is absolutely amazing!! n/t AlGoreRhythms Nov 2012 #37
Dupe deleted. WilliamPitt Nov 2012 #38
Sweet!! montanto Nov 2012 #40
Can the US secede from Texas - if so where do I sign? Smilo Nov 2012 #43
Texas should first tell us to get that "foreign" military out of Texas! Grins Nov 2012 #48
Awesome. Texas will need to rustle up some horses and bayonets until it has a proper navy, though. Politicub Nov 2012 #50
I have just the thing for Texas: coalition_unwilling Nov 2012 #87
That is funny but exactly how the White House should respond Liberalynn Nov 2012 #51
HA! That's great! bigwillq Nov 2012 #52
BTW, the border wall will now be going around your state. Incitatus Nov 2012 #53
For a very, very blue America!! Oklahoma is just going to love that, and all the new wall jobs. Coyotl Nov 2012 #54
This is getting a little old KatyMan Nov 2012 #60
And it bothers you...why? Wednesdays Nov 2012 #90
It bothers me KatyMan Nov 2012 #118
and all US dollars mshasta Nov 2012 #61
Love it! Mad_Dem_X Nov 2012 #64
WAIT A SECOND, DUers... drynberg Nov 2012 #65
That made me laugh and laugh and laugh! TheAmbivalante Nov 2012 #66
Forgot to tell them they need to pay for any infrastructure built while TX was part of the USA cui bono Nov 2012 #69
Minus 38 republican electoral votes The Jungle 1 Nov 2012 #70
Easy answer shenmue Nov 2012 #71
I think this is what Rmoney was saying self deportation. Thinkingabout Nov 2012 #82
fucking brilliant. spanone Nov 2012 #72
Not good enough. We need a Massive reclamation project there. onehandle Nov 2012 #74
no need to tear it down greymattermom Nov 2012 #112
+ Your textbook (over)buying will no longer effect progress in math and science in our states underpants Nov 2012 #75
OMG! Love it! Window Nov 2012 #76
KICK! Kickarian Kicktion, Kickery, Kickety Kickness!!! patrice Nov 2012 #77
here we go again MFM008 Nov 2012 #78
K&R Heathen57 Nov 2012 #79
Very good! ProudProgressiveNow Nov 2012 #80
Love it! hrmjustin Nov 2012 #81
Secesh Coast Guard: coalition_unwilling Nov 2012 #84
K & R! lonestarnot Nov 2012 #88
And when a hurricane hits the Gulf Coast AnnieBW Nov 2012 #92
In other words... Hekate Nov 2012 #93
We in Austin want to secede from Texas katmille Nov 2012 #94
Just noticed the petition now has 17,000 signatures Gabby Hayes Nov 2012 #100
Don't tell anyone, Gabby Hayes Nov 2012 #101
Damn well be better get the media in full alert lockdown over 0.068% of the Texans who want to leave LynneSin Nov 2012 #114
Keep it weird ashredux Nov 2012 #108
Secede? MisterScruffles Nov 2012 #95
And we have the perfect name for their new country: Dumbfuckistan. calimary Nov 2012 #99
Yeah, no kidding. Up2Late Nov 2012 #103
I'll bet the baggers would just love to pay FedEx $10 to mail a letter catbyte Nov 2012 #104
Yup, all kinds of hidden cost in stupidity Up2Late Nov 2012 #121
This is really funny.....I may "steal" it with your permission :) ashredux Nov 2012 #107
Except that our President wouldn't have misspelled Medicare tavalon Nov 2012 #110
I didn't know Medicare was actually spelled Mediciare? underoath Nov 2012 #120
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