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Ms. Toad

(34,177 posts)
Sat Jun 29, 2019, 11:32 AM Jun 2019

Please stop implying Trump is gay as an insult. [View all]

There have been at least a dozen threads and/or posts in GD over the last two days implying Trump is performing oral sex on Putin.

You know darn well that you are not celebrating Trump owning his sexuality when you post pictures of Trump kneeling before Putin unbuckling his belt, or graphically describe Trump rimming Putin. You are using it as a put down. It doesn't work as a put-down unless you are also implying that being gay is a bad thing.

There are many ways to suggest that Trump's worship of Putin (and other dictators) is inappropriate - without suggesting that the reason it is inappropriate is related to a sexual relationship between them. I'm sure you have enough creativity to use something that does not use my life as a battering ram against Trump.

I'm sick to death of encountering this meme on DU - and of having to justify my outrage at, once again, being used as an insult - or worse - being told by people who are not LGBT that it can't possibly be an insult because they don't have a homophobic bone in their body. That attitude is no better than, "some of my best friends are gay." It is sad, when I consider it a good day if I avoid a 24-hour alert time-out for alerting on a homophobic post. It's been months since a jury actually hid any that I am aware of.

I may, or may not, respond to comments trashing my opinion here - but I fully expect them. A lot of LGBT people have left the site, and most of us just suffer in silence, since it is clear that most of DU just doesn't get it. Our lives are still being threatened - especially the lives of trans individuals. Our rights are threatened - we can still be fired for being gay in many states. We can still be denied spousal health insurance - even if we are married Just because marriage is now recognized does not mean everyone believes being gay is acceptable - and calling our politial enemies gay relies on the beliefs of many that I am less than human in order to be an effective insult. We should not be hesitant to call out homophobia on a liberal Democratic site. But many of us (including me) are.

I really don't know why I bother anymore.

120 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Nobody thinks Trump is gay, and if we DID ... we wouldn't make these sorts of jokes ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #1
It doesn't matter whether you think he is gay or not Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #5
I think you're perceiving it as insult about homosexual acts, when it's not meant in that spirit mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #9
being perceived as heterosexual is not stereotypically bad Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #26
If you begin with the basic assumption that your fellow DU'ers are, in fact, NOT homophobic ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #30
This is not a complicated concept Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #62
Okay MsToad. I don't want to argue with you anymore ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #66
Thank you. n/t Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #68
"I think you're perceiving it as insult about homosexual acts, when it's not meant in that spirit.." pangaia Jun 2019 #49
i was going to respond much like this. barbtries Jun 2019 #32
Well said! maddiemom Jun 2019 #55
OMFG obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #76
OMFG barbtries Jun 2019 #90
You just proved paragraph 4 of Ms. Toad's post. cwydro Jun 2019 #36
It is not a "joke" -- that is her point obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #75
I respectfully disagree that this was anyone's intent in engaging in jocularity of this nature ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #77
You are right, of course, and yesterday was particularly bad. I was surprised at some tblue37 Jun 2019 #2
Yup - it was bad, Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #8
Yuck! I just saw that one. nt tblue37 Jun 2019 #22
Post removed Post removed Jun 2019 #3
Wow. Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #7
The 'hetero' part of the highlighted statement is not irrelevant ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #13
Dude, stop digging. cwydro Jun 2019 #18
Doh! You've got me pegged as the homophobe that I am ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #24
Yeah, it's obvious you don't care. cwydro Jun 2019 #35
Yeah, that PUA post was beyond creepy. demmiblue Jun 2019 #43
Ha, I remember that too. Tipperary Jun 2019 #44
I didn't say part of the game, nor did I say I argued with them, you clearly misunderstood my point mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #47
Yup, that was more or less me ... I didn't say it was looks though, I said I charmed them ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #45
Ms. Toad has told you why it's offensive. She's not the only one. cwydro Jun 2019 #46
I didn't say I wouldn't stop. I'm willing to stop if it's hurting people ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #50
IT IS NOT A FUNNY JOKE obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #78
Guess what? THAT WASN'T MY F***ING QUOTE. mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #86
Geez now your words are being mischaracterized. LakeArenal Jun 2019 #81
Thanks Lake ... honestly I really do try to be something of a peace-keeper, I get bummed about mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #91
Some won't accept apologies even after they demand them. LakeArenal Jun 2019 #92
Thx, back atcha Lake ... mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #94
Yes, it's the subservience. Gender is not the point. maddiemom Jun 2019 #31
And somehow "subservience" is associated with gay folks? cwydro Jun 2019 #37
WHOA. OUCH! maddiemom Jun 2019 #53
Too bad you don't get it. cwydro Jun 2019 #54
Wow, that was quick! maddiemom Jun 2019 #57
The cartoon uses homosexuality as an insult because that is (still) Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #60
"...not only smacks Trump, but OTHER LGBT individuals..." maddiemom Jun 2019 #73
Um, just a clue here dear. cwydro Jun 2019 #84
Oh, I'm SO embarrassed that you caught me out. maddiemom Jun 2019 #108
That was a typo. Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #87
Oh, excuse me. A TYPO. That explains it. maddiemom Jun 2019 #106
So a picture of Trump kneeling in front of Putin with Putin unbuckling his belt Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #110
Maybe I saw a different graphic.(???) maddiemom Jun 2019 #112
Sex was expressly what was suggested - and what was used because it was likely to get the strongest Ms. Toad Jul 2019 #118
Good lawd. n/t demmiblue Jun 2019 #12
I stay away from taking part in anything that could be seen as offensive to LGBT Blecht Jun 2019 #4
I didn't recognize this as a problem, but thanks for letting us know. marylandblue Jun 2019 #6
You bother because it's the good fight NotASurfer Jun 2019 #10
What if it was just 'yes, master'? mr_lebowski Jun 2019 #15
K&R demmiblue Jun 2019 #11
Agreed. Caliman73 Jun 2019 #14
I took it more as a 'blowing your boss to get ahead' thing TalenaGor Jun 2019 #16
Thank you. And good luck. cwydro Jun 2019 #17
Heterosexist homophobia. Behind the Aegis Jun 2019 #19
You know - the simple solution to the "problem" of us whining about that unicorn Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #64
Exactly, but... Behind the Aegis Jun 2019 #69
Really? Color me shocked. n/t Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #70
It's pretty mindblowing that you think so little of gay men as to only assocate this to gay men Snake Plissken Jun 2019 #20
It has nothing to do with what I think of gay men Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #28
You're the only who is making this about gay people Snake Plissken Jun 2019 #38
I don't complain when whites are being attacked Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #63
No, only an African American would say........Whoops maddiemom Jun 2019 #33
I agree. Some posts have been disgusting. 33taw Jun 2019 #21
I haven't alerted on any posts on the DU ripcord Jun 2019 #40
Thank you. cp Jun 2019 #23
As a poster on one of the threads I will offer my viewpoint rufus dog Jun 2019 #25
Trump is worshiping dictators Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #27
You are reading into my intent rufus dog Jun 2019 #29
No. I am saying your intent is irrelevant. Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #65
Post removed Post removed Jun 2019 #34
Wow. Tipperary Jun 2019 #39
2004... they are really coming out of the woodwork. n/t demmiblue Jun 2019 #41
missed it -- guessing it was a good thing I did obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #79
I don't think it indicates anything about being gay, but submissiveness treestar Jun 2019 #42
This Is Where RobinA Jun 2019 #96
The insult isn't that he is Gay edhopper Jun 2019 #48
Stop implying he is gay because it is clear he is a hetero sexual predator. Thomas Hurt Jun 2019 #51
I have never implied he is gay. n/t Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #67
The whole point is she isn't obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #80
It depends. . . BigDemVoter Jun 2019 #52
And as a gay man, you are free to say that. Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #59
I am LGBT+, and I find it disgustingly homophobic obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #82
Me too. cwydro Jun 2019 #109
well said. n/t 912gdm Jun 2019 #56
I hear you, but then how can we say that Trump has shown himself completely PatrickforO Jun 2019 #58
We are not losing sight of the elephant in the room Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #61
"How can we say that Trump has shown himself completely submissive to Putin?" WhiskeyGrinder Jun 2019 #100
Thank you. n/t Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #105
Thank you for the post Steelrolled Jun 2019 #71
The jokes are not only offensive to gay men, but straight women as well. John Fante Jun 2019 #72
Yup -- the root of homophobia is misogyny obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #85
Agreed. A lot of homophobia is a direct derivation of misogyny - Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #89
Agreed RobinA Jun 2019 #98
THANK YOU, YES! obamanut2012 Jun 2019 #74
It is crude. guillaumeb Jun 2019 #83
But whatever humor is needed should not use being gay as an insult. Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #88
I agree! MineralMan Jun 2019 #93
Thank you! The DU also loves making fun of peoples appearances. Weight, etc. nt USALiberal Jun 2019 #95
I comment on those, too - Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #103
Thank you Ms. Toad. It's hurtful, insulting and unnecessary. JohnnyLib2 Jun 2019 #97
I agree Raine Jun 2019 #99
K&R. Watching people trying to justify it, on Pride weekend, makes me sick. WhiskeyGrinder Jun 2019 #101
I was watching the posting yesterday - on the 50th anniversary of Stonewall Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #102
Well, you are right. NT emmaverybo Jun 2019 #104
This thread has been a real eye-opener... ADX Jun 2019 #107
Because it gathered a number of people who believe using gay as an insult in one place Ms. Toad Jun 2019 #111
It's about subservience. He is definitely not the DOM in this situation. nt UniteFightBack Jun 2019 #113
YES! YOU got it. maddiemom Jun 2019 #114
You'd better send a memo to Stephen Colbert, Bill Maher, Samantha Bee, etc. VOX Jun 2019 #115
I am not a part of any community that includes Stephen Colbert, Bill Maher, Samantha Bee Ms. Toad Jul 2019 #119
I rather see him as more of a Renfield type Bettie Jun 2019 #116
While we're "cleaning house," can we stop with the ageism here as well? VOX Jun 2019 #117
I agree - but this is not a "cleaning house" thread. Ms. Toad Jul 2019 #120
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