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cornball 24

cornball 24's Journal
cornball 24's Journal
April 24, 2020

I've figured out why Deborah Birx wears a scarf every day-so she can quickly stuff

it in her mouth to prevent her from yelling "YOU TOTAL FUCKING MORON!".

April 18, 2020

MY STORY, Episode 2 - I'm having a very productive day......

I'm having a very productive day.
I clipped my toenails and threw them away.
I'm keeping a log of the chores that I do.
By the end of next week, I'll be up around two.
Oldest Son called from the west coast.
Said I'm on Facebook too much and do too many posts.
Told him his previous statement he just contradicted.
If he sees all my posts, he's also addicted.
Second Son calls to ask if we have any beer.
He'll come down for a pickup because he lives near.
Mom, can you disinfect cans and put outside the door?
I say no problem, Son, I'll do that for sure.
I look out the window, I see him and ask
How can he drink beer when he's wearing a mask!
I'm beginning to think I have serious issues.
I've fallen in love with a new box of tissues.
While toilet paper has been on a roll,
Trying to find it has taken its toll.
Since the state stores in Pennsylvania have closed,
A heinous act that our governor imposed,
And covid-19 has brought on social distance,
My desire for wine needs some stockpile assistance.
So up to the Giant Store I go around noon
To buy lots of my cabernet, brand Smoking Loon.
As I grabbed three bottles and then three more,
The cashier tells me I can only buy four!
As a certified wino, I know my rights!
Four bottles would barely last me two nights.
I bit my tongue before it was too late.
To leave the store wineless would be a terrible fate!
Last night I made breakfast and we had it for dinner.
My omelet muffins were really a winner.
I made a dozen so I could store some away.
My husband ate seven. What more can I say.

April 17, 2020

The Confusion Illusion! White House Coronavirus briefing throws out a gazillion statistical

bullshit numbers and when over, the Confusion Illusion!

April 16, 2020

Question regarding stimulus checks. Hubs and I receive social security direct deposit.

As we don't have deductions taken out and owe taxes every year, IRS has no direct deposit info for us. We absolutely qualify for the stimulus. We both receive SS direct deposit on the 4th Wednesday of the month. Since SS has our bank info, will that be shared with IRS? If so, would stimulus money be deposited on the same day of month as social security? I can find nothing regarding this. Grateful to fellow DU folks who might have info regarding this. Went on IRS website yesterday to find "status not available".

April 14, 2020

Hey Shit for Brains, instead of spouting names of CEOs who, by the way know you are

an asshole and are laughing at you, name some of the millions of front line healthcare care and essential workers who are keeping us intact while you try to rip our nation to shreds! You are an abomination!!!!

April 10, 2020

"MY STORY" I have become a serial slouch...

I have become a serial slouch
With most of my day adhered to the couch.
The couch is unhappy, understandably so
It's sick of my butt and how big it will grow.
The food in the freezer is screaming for air
With stuff packed so tightly I don't know what's where.
Today, I made meatloaf and mixed in some wine.
Just knowing it's in there made it taste just fine.
When I go for a walk, I zig zag and scoot
So I won't get too close to another old coot!
When covid-19 first came on the scene,
I made myself crazy trying to keep the place clean.
I'm so done with that now that the dust is my friend.
So Dust Bunnies for Easter may be the new trend.
The TV's exhausted. It's been on overload.
It's acting real crazy like it wants to explode.
My MAN-nequin rarely gets up from his chair.
If it weren't for the channel change, I wouldn't know he
was there.
The State Stores are shut down and that's senior
abuse!
I'd call Social Services but that would be of no use.
Those projects I planned while I'm stuck here at home,
I haven't done one but write this silly old poem.

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Member since: Sun Mar 9, 2014, 11:01 AM
Number of posts: 1,492
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