July 1, 2013

Coming out of the Closet

By Dr. Brian Carr
President, Behavioral Health Associates, Lubbock, Texas, 1991-Present
Chairman, City of Lubbock Board of Health, 2013
Submitted on June 30, 2013 - 7:22am

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I really have tried to fit in, to be a productive member of society. I pay my taxes, exercise my right to vote, and keep my lawn mowed. I just can’t continue to live a lie.

I think I was born this way. Even as a small child I knew. My friends and I would be playing, having fun. My friend Patti lived down the street. Her ponytails and friendly smile let me know that she and I were buddies. We laughed and joked. I liked her very much. From deep inside myself I began to know that there was an attraction to girls.

I tried to push these feelings down. After all, I didn’t want trouble, didn’t want to get labeled. I hide behind my GI Joe and tinker toys. I found ways to mask my feelings, my hidden desires.

Puberty washed over me in junior high and the passion grew. Along with body odor and geeky hair I found myself looking more and more at girls. I fantasized about how Kim, Denise, and Karen might return my affection. I started to drift into hanging out next to girls, enjoying their scent and laughter.

I wasn’t able to contain my feelings anymore and my feelings took flight into action. Holding hands, kissing, and being held close fueled my life like nothing else had. I knew from Sunday School that such things might doom me to eternal hell fire but yet, I discovered such joy in those early moments.

Going steady met a refinement of my obsession, a promise of stability and a mutual pledge to be together. I learned to accept the rejection of those who didn’t understand who I was. Identifying with my sexual orientation was just another way to define myself as unique.

The freedom of college and young adulthood brought a new chapter of openness about my heterosexuality. I openly pursued women and learned all the “moves” that were to be used in the disco club. These dens of dishonor were many in Lubbock. “Faces”, “Crystal Pistol”, and “Freeman’s” on Broadway were places where I found others who shared my intensity for meeting the opposite sex. I had no shame in trying out new pick-up lines.

I began to have opposite sex sleep-over relationships. My male roommates were open-minded and enabled my carnal desires. I learned to look the other way with their “hook-ups” bringing into our house their female companions. College was a time of experimentation and Randy, Tom, Joel, Greg and I were a decadent bunch in pursuing our sick desires.

After college I would visit my old roommate Joel who lived in Austin. After college he left behind our shared experience and decided to give up on women. I tried to deny who I was and would go with him to gay bars in Austin but even then I was drawn to pursue the straight women who went there to relax. Oh, I could flirt with the men there but just never got the “zing” that told me that it was what I wanted.

Joel and I parted ways after a time. I think he was saddened by his inability to get me to make the right choice. I moved in with Valeri and we married, further confirmation of my long-standing faithfulness to who I thought I was. We raised two children and I established my career back in my home town of Lubbock.

I’ve worked to deal with my straightness and to try to be ok with it. I know that I’m more than just my sexual orientation but it is humbling to be so powerless against my desires. I wish that people would just leave me alone about it. I think that there are a lot more important issues that the government needs to get involved with. My family and friends are pretty much accepting of my heterosexuality now. My children accept and love me. My patients don’t seem to make much of a deal about it.

Can you see my point?

Now, take my story above and simply change the underlying premise about sexual orientation and think about how it shifts. Do we gain as a nation to pursue an agenda against people who are just like us with the exception of who they like to be intimate with? Do our political leaders really think that dictating morality in our behavior changes who we are inside?

I believe that sexual orientation is primarily a matter of genetics. People are “born” with the innate desire as to sexual orientation. Some small percentage of people may be traumatized by life experiences so as to pursue a particular sexual orientation because of its usefulness in obtaining benefits of authority or finance. My own professional association (American Psychological Association) does not support a view that homosexuality is a mental disorder.

My friends are my friends. Some of my friends are gay. I like my friends for who they are but I don’t worry about being overwhelmed by what they do and losing myself in their choices. Some of my friends like country music. I can listen to country music but just don’t feel a desire to do it because it is not what I like. I could engage in intimacy with another man but just don’t feel any desire to do so. I don’t fear it.

So, please enjoy your friendships and do not stand passive as those in authority push hate speech about those who are “different” for we are all “different” in some way. That is what is great about our country.

TAGS:

LubbockOnline Blog
Does Rick Perry like girls?
gay rights
haboob
hate speech
kiss and tell
Lubbock
more rain please ron
out of many one
politics
sexual health
sexual orientation
Sexuality
sirens and cake for everybody
some of my best friends are
Texas
them vs us
you look good in those pants

http://lubbockonline.com/interact/blog-post/dr-brian-carr/2013-06-30/coming-out-closet

[font color=green]Definitely read the comments![font]

July 1, 2013

Coming out of the Closet

By Dr. Brian Carr
President, Behavioral Health Associates, Lubbock, Texas, 1991-Present
Chairman, City of Lubbock Board of Health, 2013
Submitted on June 30, 2013 - 7:22am

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I really have tried to fit in, to be a productive member of society. I pay my taxes, exercise my right to vote, and keep my lawn mowed. I just can’t continue to live a lie.

I think I was born this way. Even as a small child I knew. My friends and I would be playing, having fun. My friend Patti lived down the street. Her ponytails and friendly smile let me know that she and I were buddies. We laughed and joked. I liked her very much. From deep inside myself I began to know that there was an attraction to girls.

I tried to push these feelings down. After all, I didn’t want trouble, didn’t want to get labeled. I hide behind my GI Joe and tinker toys. I found ways to mask my feelings, my hidden desires.

Puberty washed over me in junior high and the passion grew. Along with body odor and geeky hair I found myself looking more and more at girls. I fantasized about how Kim, Denise, and Karen might return my affection. I started to drift into hanging out next to girls, enjoying their scent and laughter.

I wasn’t able to contain my feelings anymore and my feelings took flight into action. Holding hands, kissing, and being held close fueled my life like nothing else had. I knew from Sunday School that such things might doom me to eternal hell fire but yet, I discovered such joy in those early moments.

Going steady met a refinement of my obsession, a promise of stability and a mutual pledge to be together. I learned to accept the rejection of those who didn’t understand who I was. Identifying with my sexual orientation was just another way to define myself as unique.

The freedom of college and young adulthood brought a new chapter of openness about my heterosexuality. I openly pursued women and learned all the “moves” that were to be used in the disco club. These dens of dishonor were many in Lubbock. “Faces”, “Crystal Pistol”, and “Freeman’s” on Broadway were places where I found others who shared my intensity for meeting the opposite sex. I had no shame in trying out new pick-up lines.

I began to have opposite sex sleep-over relationships. My male roommates were open-minded and enabled my carnal desires. I learned to look the other way with their “hook-ups” bringing into our house their female companions. College was a time of experimentation and Randy, Tom, Joel, Greg and I were a decadent bunch in pursuing our sick desires.

After college I would visit my old roommate Joel who lived in Austin. After college he left behind our shared experience and decided to give up on women. I tried to deny who I was and would go with him to gay bars in Austin but even then I was drawn to pursue the straight women who went there to relax. Oh, I could flirt with the men there but just never got the “zing” that told me that it was what I wanted.

Joel and I parted ways after a time. I think he was saddened by his inability to get me to make the right choice. I moved in with Valeri and we married, further confirmation of my long-standing faithfulness to who I thought I was. We raised two children and I established my career back in my home town of Lubbock.

I’ve worked to deal with my straightness and to try to be ok with it. I know that I’m more than just my sexual orientation but it is humbling to be so powerless against my desires. I wish that people would just leave me alone about it. I think that there are a lot more important issues that the government needs to get involved with. My family and friends are pretty much accepting of my heterosexuality now. My children accept and love me. My patients don’t seem to make much of a deal about it.

Can you see my point?

Now, take my story above and simply change the underlying premise about sexual orientation and think about how it shifts. Do we gain as a nation to pursue an agenda against people who are just like us with the exception of who they like to be intimate with? Do our political leaders really think that dictating morality in our behavior changes who we are inside?

I believe that sexual orientation is primarily a matter of genetics. People are “born” with the innate desire as to sexual orientation. Some small percentage of people may be traumatized by life experiences so as to pursue a particular sexual orientation because of its usefulness in obtaining benefits of authority or finance. My own professional association (American Psychological Association) does not support a view that homosexuality is a mental disorder.

My friends are my friends. Some of my friends are gay. I like my friends for who they are but I don’t worry about being overwhelmed by what they do and losing myself in their choices. Some of my friends like country music. I can listen to country music but just don’t feel a desire to do it because it is not what I like. I could engage in intimacy with another man but just don’t feel any desire to do so. I don’t fear it.

So, please enjoy your friendships and do not stand passive as those in authority push hate speech about those who are “different” for we are all “different” in some way. That is what is great about our country.

TAGS:

LubbockOnline Blog
Does Rick Perry like girls?
gay rights
haboob
hate speech
kiss and tell
Lubbock
more rain please ron
out of many one
politics
sexual health
sexual orientation
Sexuality
sirens and cake for everybody
some of my best friends are
Texas
them vs us
you look good in those pants

http://lubbockonline.com/interact/blog-post/dr-brian-carr/2013-06-30/coming-out-closet

[font color=green]Definitely read the comments![font]

June 30, 2013

Alabama's Jefferson county files plan to exit $4.2 billion bankruptcy

Source: AP

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Attorneys for Alabama's Jefferson County have filed a 101-page plan that would allow it to exit the largest municipal bankruptcy in American history.

The plan filed Sunday calls for cutting the county's $4.2 billion debt by more than $1.2 billion and raising sewer rates annually by 7.41 percent for four years. Rates would rise by 3.49 percent annually for an undetermined amount of years after that.

Most of the $4.2 billion debt stems from bonds that funded sewer system repairs.

The plan must be approved by creditors and ultimately Thomas Bennett, U.S. Bankruptcy Judge for the Northern District of Alabama. A hearing is scheduled for Aug. 6.

Read more: http://lubbockonline.com/filed-online/2013-06-30/alabama-county-files-plan-exit-42b-bankruptcy

June 30, 2013

#SB5 Time-Stamp Change to be Investigated by Public Integrity Unit

The Public Integrity Unit is investigating the timestamp change that occurred at the end of Tuesday's filibuster against SB 5, KXAN reported today.

In the first minutes of Wednesday morning, it appeared clear that Senate Bill 5 had failed by failing to pass before midnight. The Senate's online record showed that the vote had taken place on 6/26, Wednesday. Then, the Texas Senate's legislative record website went down, and when it reappeared the vote was mysteriously recorded as taking place on 6/25. It then switched back to 6/26 and Lt. Gov. Dewhurst announced the vote had been too late, and the special session was over. Thousands of protesters, and millions of supporters around the country, celebrated.

But why was the record changed, if only temporarily?

After receiving numerous complaints about the change, Texas' Public Integrity Unit is now investigating this question. And if they find the documents were intentionally tampered with, well, that's a felony.

More at http://www.burntorangereport.com/diary/13725/sb5-timestamp-change-to-be-investigated-by-public-integrity-unit .



Cross-posted Texas Group.

June 30, 2013

#SB5 Time-Stamp Change to be Investigated by Public Integrity Unit

The Public Integrity Unit is investigating the timestamp change that occurred at the end of Tuesday's filibuster against SB 5, KXAN reported today.

In the first minutes of Wednesday morning, it appeared clear that Senate Bill 5 had failed by failing to pass before midnight. The Senate's online record showed that the vote had taken place on 6/26, Wednesday. Then, the Texas Senate's legislative record website went down, and when it reappeared the vote was mysteriously recorded as taking place on 6/25. It then switched back to 6/26 and Lt. Gov. Dewhurst announced the vote had been too late, and the special session was over. Thousands of protesters, and millions of supporters around the country, celebrated.

But why was the record changed, if only temporarily?

After receiving numerous complaints about the change, Texas' Public Integrity Unit is now investigating this question. And if they find the documents were intentionally tampered with, well, that's a felony.

More at http://www.burntorangereport.com/diary/13725/sb5-timestamp-change-to-be-investigated-by-public-integrity-unit .



Cross-posted General Discussion.

June 30, 2013

(Bryan) Police: Driver fled from police, had (nearly a QP of) marijuana in rectum

BRYAN, TEXAS

A 20-year-old Bryan man who refused to pull over for a traffic stop is facing a felony charge, police said.

--snip--

He did not bring his car to a stop when an officer turned on his emergency lights but kept driving for less than half a mile, police said.

Once Love did pull over, police arrested him for driving with a suspended license and fleeing from police, both Class B misdemeanors punishable by up to six months in jail.

It was in the Brazos County Jail, however, that the jail staff did a full body search and found about 3.5 ounces of marijuana hidden in his rectum, according to the report.

The remainder of the story at http://www.theeagle.com/news/local/article_b45db51a-ad44-5867-8a2b-4188215322ee.html .

June 30, 2013

Round-Up Of Wendy Davis' Appearances on This Morning's Sunday Talk Shows

It was a busy morning for Texas's superhero Senator Wendy Davis. She appeared on not one, not two, but three! Sunday morning talk shows this morning, demonstrating yet again that her Tuesday night filibuster has garnered tremendous national attention.

Davis covered a wide range of topics, from how bad the omnibus back-door abortion ban is to how she felt when Rick Perry attacked her own personal story at an anti-choice convention.

In response to the start of the second special session tomorrow, Davis said,

"The eyes of Texas, the eyes of the country are watching, and they are going to be held accountable for the decisions that they make in this process. If people continue to see that their voices are being ignored, I think we are going to see a long-term sustained response to that."

The remainder of this article with videos are at http://www.burntorangereport.com/diary/13723/roundup-of-wendy-davis-appearances-on-sunday-talk-shows .

June 30, 2013

Lt. Gov. Dewhurst & Atty. Gen. Greg Abbott Consider Charges Against Student Who Led Eyes of Texas

Leigh Larson, a leader of and organizer with College Kids For Wendy, is now becoming another face of the movement to Stand With Texas Women. Much like Martha Northington, Larson has received a lot of plaudits for leading the "Eyes of Texas" in the Capitol Rotunda at the end of Tuesday night's citizen filibuster.

Now Lt. Governor David Dewhurst may have his eyes on her. She has received notice that the Lt. Governor and Attorney General Greg Abbott may be considering pressing charges on her along with others for "disturbing the peace" and "inciting a riot".

I (Joe Deshotel) was sitting with Leigh when she first heard the rumor and she had the following response:

"I'm not gonna worry about it, I have a Spanish test on Tuesday."

More at http://www.burntorangereport.com/diary/13720/lt-gov-dewhurst-atty-gen-greg-abbott-consider-charges-against-student-who-led-eyes-of-texas

[font color=green]Dewy is such a turd that he'll do anything to blame someone else besides himself for failure.[/font]

June 29, 2013

Former Melissa mayor sentenced to 33 months in bribery scheme

SHERMAN – The former mayor of Melissa was sentenced to 33 months in federal prison Friday for soliciting a bribe from a local developer during his time in office.

David Dorman, who presided over the rural Collin County city from 1999 to 2009, pleaded guilty in January to a charge...

Premium content at http://www.dallasnews.com/news/crime/headlines/20130628-former-melissa-mayor-sentenced-to-33-months-in-bribery-scheme.ece . (subscription required)

June 29, 2013

Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst decides against arresting Texas media

Updated 10:15 a.m. Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst’s office says after reviewing the video tapes, it has concluded the media acted appropriately the night of the Senate filibuster and won’t be arrested after all. A spokesman said Saturday the Republican lieutenant governor instructed his staff to look at the video after someone told him reporters were cheering on protesters in the gallery who disrupted the legislative proceedings. “He had his staff review tapes and was happy to learn that the media conducted themselves in a matter consistent with the decorum of the Senate chamber,” said Dewhurst spokesman Travis Considine. “He has a deep and abiding respect for the Texas press corps.”

Original story Lt. Gov David Dewhurst says his office is reviewing video of the Senate filibuster and protest that doomed an abortion bill to see if the media should be arrested. Dewhurst told a conservative web site that he suspects reporters were complicit in inciting a riot. He offered no evidence, but said his staff is looking over the tapes of the final, chaotic night last Tuesday. “If I find, as I’ve been told, examples of the media waving and trying to inflame the crowd, incite them in the direction of a riot, I’m going to take action against them,” Dewhurst told Hot Air. “We have reports that members of the media on the floor, on the floor of the Senate, were looking up at the people in the gallery, waving their hands, trying to motivate them to yell more. If I find examples of that, proof certain on our video,” Dewhurst warned, “I’m going to address this firmly.”

Dewhurst lost control of the chamber when abortion-rights supporters in the Senate gallery began shouting and jeering Tuesday night after he cut off Sen. Wendy Davis’ 11-hour filibuster against a bill that would outlaw abortions after 20 weeks. The noise left Dewhurst flummoxed and the clock ran out on the special session, killing the bill. Gov. Rick Perry has called lawmakers back into another legislative session on Monday. Credentialed reporters are allowed on the Senate floor and have a table where they report what happens. They must follow Senate rules or could have their credentials revoked. Several House Democrats were on the floor Tuesday night, and some of them raised their hands toward the gallery to encourage protesters. Critics in Dewhurst’s own Republican Party say he mismanaged the calendar, allowing the critical abortion debate to come to a vote too late. Three Republicans – including a GOP state senator – are challenging his reelection next year, saying he is an inept leader. Dewhurst disputes that in his interview with Hot Air.

“I had the strategy,” he said. But he said the “ugly mob … went wild.” He said he anticipates demonstrators will return as lawmakers reconsider abortion in the 30-day special session that begins on Monday. But he says this time, he’ll be prepared. He raised the possibility of keeping the public out of the Senate gallery if he fears another demonstration during a crucial floor vote. In lieu of access to the Senate, Dewhurst said he will set up a closed-circuit video feed to committee rooms to those interested in observing rather than demonstrating. “We’re all for openness and transparency,” Dewhurst said, “but if you’re having a demonstration which is going to impede the legislature from moving forward, I’m perfectly at ease with clearing the gallery with our state police.”

More at http://trailblazersblog.dallasnews.com/2013/06/will-lt-gov-dewhurst-have-texas-media-arrested.html/ .

[font color=green]Those in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. A citizen's arrest for the felony of tampering with a government record seems appropriate. What a prick! Dewhurst should quit trying to blame everybody else for his failures. The media is not going to look upon him kindly after making a shoot from the hip accusation that had no factual basis.

Poster caption courtesy of mbperrin.[/font]