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Mister Ed

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Member since: Wed Dec 8, 2004, 11:05 PM
Number of posts: 2,717

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The tiger is stirring.

My friend Charles and I get together frequently, and the conversation often turns to the dire state of things since the election of 2016. Last year, in the course of one of those conversations, I sank into a rare state of defeatism and despair. "Dear god", I said. "We really may be screwed."

Now, Charles is probably one of the most hard-nosed and unsentimental guys I've ever known. He lives in the world of hard facts. Nothing Kumbaya about this guy.

So what was his hard-nosed, unsentimental assesment?

"You're wrong, Ed.", he declared firmly. "It's going to be women. You'll see. Women are going to bring the change."

That seemed like sort of a surprising statement, coming from Charles. But I let his words echo in my brain, and I began to feel the truth of them. Waxing eloquent, I replied slowly:

"Yeeess. Yes. That's it. That's going to be it. Women are the sleeping tiger of the world. When the tiger walks, things are going to be different."

And now, sometimes when I least expect it, I get a strange feeling, and a sudden realization washes over me:

The tiger is stirring.

Sometimes it comes to me when things seem darkest.

The tiger is stirring. In the darkness of the jungle, the tiger is stirring.

I bear in mind that a tiger is a creature that moves in ways that are often outside of my understanding. It does not exist to fulfill my wishes, even the most noble of them. It does not heed my call, and it does not respond to my urging. It will move in its own way, and its own time, and not in the ways that I expect or anticipate.

But it is immensely powerful.

And I feel it, I'm sure of it: The tiger is stirring.

Oh, they think they have nothing to fear from the tiger. They think they have it cowed and tamed. They think they are strong. They think they are invulnerable.

But listen closely, friends, and listen closely, foes:

The tiger is stirring.

Misandry is real, misandry is out there...

..and honestly, I gotta tell ya: it doesn't affect me in the least.

Let's face it: there really are some women out there who just innately hate men. There have to be. Heck, I think I've even encountered a couple of them in my life. And that there hatred of men is what you'd call misandry.

Whoever and wherever they are, I guess what's made their hatred of me so bearable is that they seem to have so much self-restraint about it. I mean, really. They've never harmed me a bit - or even tried to.

They've never hurt me or hit me, they've never beat me or raped me. And they've never once murdered me! (I have to admit, that's one of my personal favorites. I love not being murdered! But doesn't everyone?)

Amazingly, though, their self-control seems to extend way beyond just eschewing violence. Comes right down to it, they've never even used the threat of violence, implicit or explicit, to intimidate me, or demean me, or try to subjugate me. So that part's good.

Plus, they're not out there making unwelcome sexual advances on me to creep me out and make me feel vulnerable and stuff.

They might sit at home at night and stew about how they hate men. I don't know. And the reason I don't know is that they're not out there all around me, making their hatred plain and casting a cloud over my life. If I want to find stuff they've written about hating me, I have to go hunting for it. And if I find it, it seems like its really abstract and impersonal and academic. Which still might hurt my feelings. But it's waaay better than threats of violence and stuff.

It's also lucky that they're not using the power of government, or religion, to keep beating me down just because they hate me. 'Cause that would really suck.

So all in all, I'd have to say these misandrists are pretty civil about the way they hate me. All in all, I have to think that if we could ever get to where all the world's misogynists would follow their lead, well, that would be the next best thing to no hatin' at all.

All in all, I think I'd have to be one sorry-assed, self-possessed, sniveling sonofabitch to sit here snug and secure in the cushy cocoon of my straight-white-male life complaining about these misandrists. All in all, I guess if I wanna think about that kind of stuff, my time's probably better spent trying to figure out what I, as an individual, am gonna be doing to keep from causing anger, and even hatred, to take root in other women or girls.

P.S. Don't think for a minute I'm done here. One of these days, when I get around to it, I'm going to go off on a little rant about "reverse racism", and how oppressed I am by all those people of other races who hate me. Spoiler alert: it's going to be a lot like this rant here.

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