I dated Bob 40 years ago, 20 years ago and now we’ve been together for 2 years. While he was apolitical before, he became a strong Democrat and drove me around as I canvassed for our new Congresswoman Xochitl Small. Last night I was at his and his 88 year old father’s house to eat the meal we bought (already cooked) with his right wing, Fox lovin’ sister and ex- girlfriend, who cleans for his father and lives with his sister. Father said prayer and here is where I stoked the fires unnecessarily: I quoted Matthew 2 verse 12 about Jesus Joseph and Mary having to escape violence in their own country and went to Egypt. His sister started fuming, announced no one should leave but should stay and fix their own country. I said I was talking about Biblical story and I turned to the father and asked him about the farmer who used a whip against him. Sister started yelling the uncle (I knew nothing about an uncle) never was violent. Boyfriend never looked at me from the time they walked in. Ex girlfriend never said a word to me. I asked sister if she wanted me to leave, she looked at Bob and told him to tell me to back off. I asked him if I should leave. He said yes. I asked him what I’d done wrong. He said everything. I recognize that I was pushing buttons. I couldn’t help it. I also (unreasonably, unrealistically?) want a man who is loyal to me. I also think the women walked in ready for fight. I’m not even asking for advice or agreement from DU, just expressing my hurt, disappointment (in me and him) I’m trying not to think and obsess about what to do or say, just to be still, grieve over lost relationship and take care of myself. On second thought, I could really use some advice.