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Hometown: Austin, TX
Home country: U.S.
Member since: 2001
Number of posts: 18,063

Journal Archives

Texas Judge's Order Upholding 'Bikini Tops For Strippers' Law Is Completely Hilarious

Huffington Post 4/30/13

Texas Judge's Order Upholding 'Bikini Tops For Strippers' Law Is Completely Hilarious

This is one of the funniest, most eloquent court documents we've ever seen.

In allowing the city of San Antonio, Texas, to enforce an order that strippers wear bikini tops instead of nipple-covering "pasties," U.S. District Judge Fred Biery noted that the issue had once again "fallen into the court's lap."

Biery's opinion, titled "The Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Bikini Top Vs. The (More) Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Pastie," said his job was to answer "the age old question, now with constitutional implications: 'Does size matter?'"

Although Biery ruled that San Antonio's strip clubs did not prove their need for an injunction to block a 2012 law requiring exotic dancers to cover their breasts "from the top of the areola" down, he also cast doubt on the city's claim that such regulations would cut down on violent crime, drug dealing and prostitution:

America's Dumbest Congressman melting down before our eyes

DailyKos 4/30/13

Look, this isn't even funny at this point. We need an intervention. Somebody help this man:

Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX)—who has spent the weeks following the bombing arguing that Obama’s “political correctness” prevented the FBI from stopping the attacks—appeared on the Glenn Beck radio show to argue that Holder’s history of defending terrorists allowed the judge to Mirandize Tsarnaev:

GOHMERT: Think about it, when your attorney general spent more of his legal career helping terrorists than defending the country, then you know we all have certain biases and lean certain ways.

Gohmert then went on to reiterate his belief that the Obama administration is guided by the Muslim Brotherhood. “[The administration] know who’s in there advising them,” Gohmert said, “either they lie under oath or they do know the extent of Muslim Brotherhood infiltration into our government.”

No, I mean it. Is there a number we should be calling? Can someone check for a medical alert bracelet? Because this poor man is seeing invisible Muslims everywhere, and in every federal department:

Gohmert is certainly one of the craziest bat shit crazy Texas republicans.

I wish the melting part was literally true. Would love to see Gohmert wash down some drain!

California political cartoon depicting West: Crossing the line or valid point?

At the risk of igniting the California/Texas debate thing - here goes

AAS 4/26/13

Sacramento Bee political cartoonist Jack Ohman caused a stir this week with a cartoon that some are calling insensitive.

The cartoon features Gov. Rick Perry saying that “Business is booming in Texas!” followed by a large explosion. Behind Perry are signs saying “Low Tax!” and “Low Regs!”

Ohman said he stood behind the cartoon, which he said depicted “Gov. Rick Perry’s marketing of Texas’ loose regulations, juxtaposed with the explosion of the fertilizer plant in West, Texas.”

The truth hurts. Perry and his no/low regulation environment certainly set the stage for this. However, the people of West probably did not have a clue how dangerous that plant was.

Texas wants federal disaster aid it refused to give others

DailyKos 4/18/13
Texas wants federal disaster aid it refused to give others

U.S. Rep. Bill Flores, whose district includes West, called on all Americans to pray for the victims of this tragedy.
"I am grateful for all of the police, fire, emergency responders and volunteers from our community and around the state who have come to aid those in need," he said. "Our offices will continue to monitor the aftermath and be on hand to assist our friends and neighbors throughout the recovery process."

How does Flores plan on assisting? By asking for federal aid presumably (his prayers won't accomplish anything tangible), the same kind of federal aid he voted against for Sandy victims.

U.S. Sens. John Cornyn and Ted Cruz of Texas released a joint statement saying they are among those grieving for those who were injured or lost loved ones in the blast.
"We) are grateful to the firefighters and first responders who risked their own lives to keep others safe," they said. "We ask all Texans to keep West in their thoughts and prayers. We remain in communication with Gov. Perry's office and emergency management officials, and stand to offer whatever support we can."

Both Cornyn and Cruz voted against Sandy aid as well, of course. What kind of aid do they think they are proposing for West? Aside from their prayers, that is.

Markos has a point. Either we're all in this together, or we're not.

Not that any of our idiot Congressmen/Senators would get it.
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