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Joe BidenCongratulations to our presumptive Democratic nominee, Joe Biden!
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 11:59 AM Oct 2019

People often say "I don't have a problem voting for a woman, but I worry that other people will"

And then use that as an excuse for not supporting female candidates.

Please think about what this says, what it means, and how that affects female candidates and the process.

Among other things, it feeds into and perpetuates systemic discrimination while allowing themselves to feel "above it all" and appear not to be participating in the sexism they claim to be identifying.

Fearing that someone else will behave in a sexist manner is not a valid excuse for not voting for a woman. If you don't want to vote for the female candidate, for whatever reason that may be, don't vote for her. But claiming you're not going to vote for her because you think someone else might not vote for her because they're sexist makes you as culpable in the sexism as the people whose behavior you claim to be able to predict and feel entitled to protect the rest of us from.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
45 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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People often say "I don't have a problem voting for a woman, but I worry that other people will" (Original Post) StarfishSaver Oct 2019 OP
I came across an article in the last year that talked about "electability" and the idea that when WhiskeyGrinder Oct 2019 #1
Yes! StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #2
Was it this one? PunkinPi Oct 2019 #5
This isn't a game, or an abstract exercise; it is an election, and, such factors do exist LongtimeAZDem Oct 2019 #3
Um, Hillary Clinton won the popular vote with 3 million votes. So "other people" sure have in the CTyankee Oct 2019 #4
White men lost the popular vote in the last three elections to a minority and a woman StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #6
+1, This! nt PunkinPi Oct 2019 #7
Ditto! (n/t) corbettkroehler Oct 2019 #9
As long as we have an Electoral College IronLionZion Oct 2019 #12
It won't prevent him from taking it away from a qualified man, either StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #13
Or from a qualified man, right? CTyankee Oct 2019 #16
Correct IronLionZion Oct 2019 #19
A white man has lost every single presidential election in American history EffieBlack Oct 2019 #21
I'm supporting a female candidate in this race IronLionZion Oct 2019 #22
+1000! mcar Oct 2019 #24
I Wish It Were Irrelevant - To Me, It's A Cop-Out But You're Right (n/t) corbettkroehler Oct 2019 #8
Wow. cwydro Oct 2019 #36
Ugh. cwydro Oct 2019 #40
I'm afraid that there is still too big a % of the population that are biased against... George II Oct 2019 #10
That's not a good enough excuse to not run or vote for them StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #14
I'm not one of those. Back in 2008 when the primary campaigns began I supported Clinton, then.... George II Oct 2019 #17
She won the popular vote. cwydro Oct 2019 #41
I have no problem with supporting and voting for a woman candidate. Backseat Driver Oct 2019 #11
Well, tell that to ALL the other countries of the world that have elected women heads of state. CTyankee Oct 2019 #18
Seriously? StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #20
Seriously? mcar Oct 2019 #25
The Islamic Republic of Pakistan elected a female prime minister IronLionZion Oct 2019 #29
Wow.. cwydro Oct 2019 #43
This is like the people who say THEY'RE not racist, but their customers are, so EffieBlack Oct 2019 #15
I cannot even count how many times I've heard that mcar Oct 2019 #23
Agree with the premise True Dough Oct 2019 #26
I love Elizabeth Warren... zaj Oct 2019 #27
Why do you think not assuming a woman need not apply because "other people" might discriminate StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #28
Wishful thinking is that... zaj Oct 2019 #33
EVERYTHING affects elections StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #34
That's not true. We didn't run... zaj Oct 2019 #38
Bernie didn't get the nomination because voters thought Hillary was much more qualified StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #39
That's not universally true. zaj Oct 2019 #42
Sexism and racism ARE a reality, but the response is that we must spooky3 Oct 2019 #30
We Democrats have no problem voting for women happybird Oct 2019 #31
I know many people who would not vote for a woman President, but none would vote Democrat anyway. Midnight Writer Oct 2019 #32
What is your basis for "people often say"? brooklynite Oct 2019 #35
Yeah , we've got those people here. cwydro Oct 2019 #37
If you don't vote for a woman because you claim other people are too sexist to elect her jcgoldie Oct 2019 #44
Or at the very least, you're perpetuating systemic misogyny StarfishSaver Oct 2019 #45
 

WhiskeyGrinder

(22,326 posts)
1. I came across an article in the last year that talked about "electability" and the idea that when
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:10 PM
Oct 2019

people pick candidates by making assumptions about what other people will support, we end up with candidates nobody really likes. We outthink ourselves. I wish I could find it again.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
2. Yes!
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:13 PM
Oct 2019

People were so sure that "other people" wouldn't vote for Barack Obama. I kept telling them "stop worrying about what you think other people might do and vote the way you want to vote."

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

PunkinPi

(4,875 posts)
5. Was it this one?
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:30 PM
Oct 2019

Vote for the Candidate You Actually Like, Not the One You Think Will Win by Jess McIntosh

https://www.elle.com/culture/career-politics/a28817104/elizabeth-warren-joe-biden-electability/

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

LongtimeAZDem

(4,494 posts)
3. This isn't a game, or an abstract exercise; it is an election, and, such factors do exist
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:16 PM
Oct 2019

Ignoring them, or pretending they don't matter, is a naive recipe for disaster.

I will happily, enthusiastically support and promote a female candidate if one wins the nomination, but I see it as a factor that diminishes our chances of ousting Trump.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

CTyankee

(63,903 posts)
4. Um, Hillary Clinton won the popular vote with 3 million votes. So "other people" sure have in the
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:22 PM
Oct 2019

supported a woman for president.

This is a sham argument, made by people who really don't want a woman candidate. this is pure and simple bullshit.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
6. White men lost the popular vote in the last three elections to a minority and a woman
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:30 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

IronLionZion

(45,427 posts)
12. As long as we have an Electoral College
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:58 PM
Oct 2019

winning 3 million more votes in blue states like California doesn't stop a flaming orange pile of toxic waste from taking the presidency away from a qualified woman.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
13. It won't prevent him from taking it away from a qualified man, either
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:03 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

CTyankee

(63,903 posts)
16. Or from a qualified man, right?
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:08 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

IronLionZion

(45,427 posts)
19. Correct
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:14 PM
Oct 2019

We need more than votes. We need electoral votes.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
21. A white man has lost every single presidential election in American history
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:21 PM
Oct 2019

That hasn’t stopped anyone from running a white man in the next election.

Just like in the real world, white men can fail miserably over and over and it is never held against other white man while women and minorities are constantly held to a higher standard and if one of our own fails to grab the brass ring every single time, the rest of us are told to stand down so that a white man can step in.

White men lost the popular vote to a black man and a woman in 2008, 2012 and 2016. The black president was, without question, one of the most popular, effective, and respected presidents in the country’s history .And the white man who stole the presidency from a woman in 2016 is an unrepentant criminal pig whom most of the country despises and wants removed from office. Yet, I have yet to hear anyone claim that Joe Biden or Bernie Sanders or any of the other white men running this time should step back and allow a minority or female to have a clearer shot because America would surely prefer a non-white male this time around.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

IronLionZion

(45,427 posts)
22. I'm supporting a female candidate in this race
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:29 PM
Oct 2019

and it would be great if Biden and Sanders stepped aside to let her take down the "unrepentant criminal pig" without any emails or Benghazi. Warren would kick his ass

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

corbettkroehler

(1,898 posts)
8. I Wish It Were Irrelevant - To Me, It's A Cop-Out But You're Right (n/t)
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:32 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

George II

(67,782 posts)
10. I'm afraid that there is still too big a % of the population that are biased against...
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:54 PM
Oct 2019

....women and African Americans in public office. That Barack Obama won in 2008 was bigger than many people think. He not only overcame the republican candidate but also overcame the conscious or even unconscious bias that he is AA.

The same thing with Hillary Clinton in 2016 - she was running against more than just trump, but the innate bias of many Americans

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
14. That's not a good enough excuse to not run or vote for them
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:05 PM
Oct 2019

Every candidate has downsides. But men's deficits aren't treated as deal-breakers - we just figure out how to balance them out and overcome them. But we - even those who should know better - treat women and minorities differently. It's used as an excuse not to go any further instead of as one of the many things we must overcome when dealing with human beings in any situation.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

George II

(67,782 posts)
17. I'm not one of those. Back in 2008 when the primary campaigns began I supported Clinton, then....
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:08 PM
Oct 2019

as time went on and we got to see more about what Obama was like (he was pretty much unknown in early 2008), I switched and voted for Obama in our primary, and then twice in the two General Elections. I was 100% behind Clinton in 2016.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

cwydro

(51,308 posts)
41. She won the popular vote.
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:19 PM
Oct 2019

You miss that?

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

Backseat Driver

(4,390 posts)
11. I have no problem with supporting and voting for a woman candidate.
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 12:58 PM
Oct 2019

However, I do worry that US talks and negotiations with mid east/muslim nations may not be taken as seriously; hence a tasked statesMAN in her administration. That may sound misogynistic nationally as women are not really a minority nor are they incapable of being a tough and effective leader; but legislation will not change how global societies and cultures inwardly view this segment anymore than other discriminations. I want to, instead, view talks like these with a UNITED presence of gender in peacemaking and disciplinary decisions the US would convey to global leaders that might use a form of selective hearing in these meetings regardless of other factors necessary for great leadership such as intelligence, knowledge, communication skills, age and/or appearance.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

CTyankee

(63,903 posts)
18. Well, tell that to ALL the other countries of the world that have elected women heads of state.
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:13 PM
Oct 2019

Most of them our allies. They don't seem to have your worry.

Why is that?

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

mcar

(42,302 posts)
25. Seriously?
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:45 PM
Oct 2019

Hillary Clinton was one of the most successful SoS in American history.

You also may have noticed that many other countries have female leaders.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

IronLionZion

(45,427 posts)
29. The Islamic Republic of Pakistan elected a female prime minister
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 02:02 PM
Oct 2019

India and Sri Lanka and a few African countries have elected female prime ministers.

It's funny how many female Secretaries of State have handled US talks and negotiations with mid east Muslim nations.

DUers were concerned the world wasn't ready for Obama either.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

cwydro

(51,308 posts)
43. Wow..
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:21 PM
Oct 2019

This thread is illuminating.

Unfuckingbelievable.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
15. This is like the people who say THEY'RE not racist, but their customers are, so
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:05 PM
Oct 2019

they’d better not hire the black sales clerk or THEY’RE not racist, but their neighbors are, so they’d better not sell their house to that nice black family ...

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

mcar

(42,302 posts)
23. I cannot even count how many times I've heard that
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:43 PM
Oct 2019

Along, of course, with: "I want to vote for a women, just not that woman."

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

True Dough

(17,301 posts)
26. Agree with the premise
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:47 PM
Oct 2019

and would extend it to "a gay man." That's not the only thing holding Pete Buttigieg back, but it's one of them.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

zaj

(3,433 posts)
27. I love Elizabeth Warren...
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 01:47 PM
Oct 2019

She is my favorite. But you are definitely wrong here.

Wishful thinking won't win elections.

Elizabeth Warren might, but not wishful thinking.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
28. Why do you think not assuming a woman need not apply because "other people" might discriminate
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 02:01 PM
Oct 2019

against her is "wishful thinking"?

Any wishful thinking occurring in this context is more likely coming from those who assume that a white man should always be the go-to until American gets over its racism and sexism. Wishful thinking and white male entitlement on full display.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

zaj

(3,433 posts)
33. Wishful thinking is that...
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 03:23 PM
Oct 2019

... mysoginy won't impact the election.

I thought Obama knocked down the harder, higher glass ceiling. And that sexism was clearly less of an issue than racism.

That turned out to be wildly untrue. I now believe that a strong, thoughtful, professional black man faces less emotional resistance than a strong, thoughtful, professional white woman.

It's terrible in either case.

But it requires wishful thinking to believe that being a woman won't make it harder to win this year.

I think Biden has enough flaws and Elizabeth Warren is amazing. So I think she can overcome them right now.

But the I "won't vote for a woman" but won't say it... voting block (older, whiter, less educated, suburban/rural independent swing voters) are real. And we probably need them to defeat Trump. And we definitely need them in places like Ohio, Arizona, Maine, Colorado... to win the Senate.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
34. EVERYTHING affects elections
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 03:35 PM
Oct 2019

But we don't avoid running candidates because someone else might not like something about them - unless, of course they're women or minorities.

Lots of people won't vote for a white man. But we don't refuse to run white men because of it. White men lose elections. We don't refuse to run white men because of that.

You can spin it and sugar coated all you want. But the notion that a woman or minority shouldn't be the nominee because some unnamed, unidentified "other people" might not vote for them is pure bullshit. It's unapologetic white male privilege on full display. And it's no more acceptable than refusing to hire a person of color because other people are racist or give a qualified woman executive a promotion because some of the corporate board members are misogynist. Even though it's masked superficially in non-racist, non-sexist language, it's still, plain and simple, racism and sexism - only it's worse because it's being practiced by our extensible allies who should know and do better

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

zaj

(3,433 posts)
38. That's not true. We didn't run...
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:08 PM
Oct 2019

... Bernie because he didn't seem electable. We might not run Biden or Bernie because they seem too old. We might not run Kamala because she's a strong black woman. We might not run Buttiegieg because he's gay.

Politics is about power. And it's hard to accumulate the trust requires to gain power. Dems generally don't fear the outlier, minority, different kinda people. But we can recognize how others don't share our enlightenment. But we know we need others to win power.

You are absolutely right to object. And you are right to challenge the assumptions. And you are right to push me in this post.

I just think it's clear that what I'm arguing is clearly, if uncomfortably, true.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
39. Bernie didn't get the nomination because voters thought Hillary was much more qualified
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:14 PM
Oct 2019

But we also heard plenty of people saying she shouldn't get the nomination because people wouldn't vote for a woman. And after she didn't obtain the presidency, people are now claiming that's proof that the country won't vote for a woman and are using that as an excuse disqualify women running now and giving the nomination to a man by default ... Because "other people won't vote for a woman."

And while it's true that there are people who won't vote for a woman, it's not true that that should be the basis on which Democrats select our nominee.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

zaj

(3,433 posts)
42. That's not universally true.
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:20 PM
Oct 2019

In fact, I would venture to guess you might not find even one person on this site or any pundit in the media making that case.

He was old. He was crazy. He was extreme. He was unelectable. He was scary. He was marginal. He was radical. He was progun. He had a problem with black voters. He... He... He...

People said all of those things.

I don't remember anyone saying he wasn't qualified enough.

They were both objectively experienced. They were both objectively qualified.

He seemed unelectable. And she seemed a pretty clear winner.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

spooky3

(34,438 posts)
30. Sexism and racism ARE a reality, but the response is that we must
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 02:06 PM
Oct 2019

work harder, contribute more, etc., to put all of our candidates over the top.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

happybird

(4,604 posts)
31. We Democrats have no problem voting for women
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 02:09 PM
Oct 2019

Our votes were not enough to win the EC last time. That’s my fear.

HRC had a bunch of stupid conspiracy theory bullshit working against her, but how many moderates and right-leaning dump haters, how many delegates “couldn’t bring themselves to vote for her” because of the bs OR simply because she is a woman?? Their god supposedly doesn’t like to see women in power. The poor, put-upon white man votes based on fear of being further marginalized and emasculated (Gag. It made me nauseated just typing that). That’s what we are up against.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

Midnight Writer

(21,745 posts)
32. I know many people who would not vote for a woman President, but none would vote Democrat anyway.
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 02:30 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

brooklynite

(94,502 posts)
35. What is your basis for "people often say"?
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 03:51 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

cwydro

(51,308 posts)
37. Yeah , we've got those people here.
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:01 PM
Oct 2019

They fool no one.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
 

jcgoldie

(11,631 posts)
44. If you don't vote for a woman because you claim other people are too sexist to elect her
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:28 PM
Oct 2019

...then you are the de facto sexist.

If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Undecided
 

StarfishSaver

(18,486 posts)
45. Or at the very least, you're perpetuating systemic misogyny
Tue Oct 15, 2019, 04:49 PM
Oct 2019
If I were to vote in a presidential
primary today, I would vote for:
Joe Biden
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