Rural/Farm Life
Related: About this forumMy dog has died.
On Christmas Day he was put down. He didn't eat on the 24th, and vomited in the early evening. I let him out side, but he didn't come back in. When i was ready for bed I went looking for him. He came out from under a rose bush and came back in the house. After I had gone to bed I could hear him vomit again. When I got up in the morning I could see he vomited up a blood clot and was bleeding from his mouth. I took him to the emergency vet. They wanted $3000 to look at him I put it on my credit card. They took X-rays and said he had fluid in his abdomen, and would need a ultra sound to know what was wrong. To get that I would need to drive to Marin where it would cost $1,000 and I could spend the night in a Hotel. I said I wasn't going to be driving down there, and I would leave my dog overnight for them to do the ultrasound the next day. They wanted another $2000 before I left. They asked me to call when I got home. I did. Then they called me back a little later and said he went into septic shock, and rather then let him suffer, they put him down. I went back on Tuesday and picked him up to bring him home and bury him. They gave me a $1,620 refund. He was the smartest dog I have ever owned. All my other dogs would let themselves in when they wanted to come in the house, but he was the only one that would open the door from the inside and let himself out.
I live on a coastal ridge on the Sonoma Co California coast. There hasn't been a frost here yet this winter. I live within a Homeowners Association and there are a few 40 acre parcels for sale. I have wondered if there might be folks looking for property that might be interested in moving into the wild. There are Mt lions and bears that show up now and then. Twice I have had a mt lion thin my flock of sheep. The coyote has taken a few too. The soils are quite radical. There is a hill behind the firehouse that is made of chert. That used to be the ocean floor where diatoms collected and were subducted and transformed under heat and pressure into something the Indians could make arrow heads out of. There is also an area on the ranch whee there is a lot of cobble. I thought it was part of an old river bed, but a geologist told me it was glacial moraine. Then there are big boulders 15 - 20' in diameter that made their way here from the Sierras. The San Andras Fault is just a couple miles to the West. And on another near by Homeowners Association there is rock that used to be a volcanic core. There are also sandy soils called Gold Ridge Cap. A type of soil that will support apple orchards without needing summer water.
Well, my best friend has died. He came into my life crawling onto my lap and chewing on my beard. The 25th he got into the truck, then out of the truck and walked to the door of the Vet's but resisted going in the door way. Two people had to come carry him inside. I don't post a lot on DU, but I just wanted to connect with some folks and share my life. Just over 6 years ago I was driving home from visiting my family after Thanksgiving and lost my partner of 40 + years. I didn't share that with DU at the time, but I thought about doing so several times.
Well, I guess I will close this and wish everyone a productive new year.
Eagle East, Coyote South, Brown Bear West, White Buffalo North, Great Spirit, Mother Earth and all my relations; Thank You for the Many Blessings bestowed upon me and show me the path to be a blessing myself.
revmclaren
(2,613 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Irish_Dem
(58,644 posts)I have gone through the same thing and it is heartbreaking.
Giving you a very big hug.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)ret5hd
(21,320 posts)completely forgiving
completely loving
i feel for you brother/sister.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Laura PourMeADrink
(42,770 posts)dflprincess
(28,497 posts)The only thing wrong with a dog is that, sooner or later, they break your heart. He sounds like he was an exceptional pal.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)He was always running out to greet me when I arrived back home.
OAITW r.2.0
(28,478 posts)Had a great Golden Retriever named KC Jones back in the 80s.. KC for sort. Great dog. Broke his hind leg jumping for a tennis ball. 3 months of rehab and the vet tells us that he had bone cancer, totally in his bones. See you Casey...you and Buddha and Buffett still survive in the Skippa!
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)niyad
(120,328 posts)brer cat
(26,367 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)et tu
(1,884 posts)take solace in knowing that your dog was loved and shared a good life with you.
it's hard
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)I have a neighbor who walks her dog around sunset. She said one day she found my dog and my cat two parcels away. They were buddies, and the cat misses him too.
Laura PourMeADrink
(42,770 posts)ZZenith
(4,323 posts)Thanks for taking such good care of him while you could.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Walleye
(35,954 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)That was easier, he had cancer, was on hospice so we were expecting it.
Laura PourMeADrink
(42,770 posts)Is to incorporate their best into yourself.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Laura PourMeADrink
(42,770 posts)Always think about the unconditional love. Like a comedian I heard one time...
"Lock your mate and your dog in the car trunk for three hours. Which one will be happy to see you?"
dgauss
(1,099 posts)democrank
(11,250 posts)So sorry for all youve been through.Remember we are here for you.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Deuxcents
(19,919 posts)When you reach the bridge to heaven when its your time. It is painful to lose a loved one and Im sure you are a blessing to those who know you just by your words here. I wish you peace Dream Weaver
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)I'm not looking for the bridge.
Deuxcents
(19,919 posts)niyad
(120,328 posts)Last edited Sat Dec 30, 2023, 12:54 PM - Edit history (1)
and send peace and comfort to his grieving loved ones.
I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious boy. Please know that all of us who are owned by the furpeople are grieving with you. And sorry as well for the loss of your partner. Your DU family is here for you. Lean as hard as you need.
If it would help you at all, in the Pet forum, we have a Memorial section. where people can share photos of their fur children.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)niyad
(120,328 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)IMG_20211230_115900.jpg
This is by the Phone Booth where folks with cell phones can get reception.
IMG_20211230_114552.jpg
This is Zeke at the front door. There is a lot of reflection in the glass door making it look like a double exposure.
I sure miss him and think of him a lot.
(I checked this in preview and I just get jpg numbers, I checked to see how to post pictures, went to IMGUR but to sign in they want a phone number they can text me to. I don't have a cell phone. If you private message me your email address I can send you two. Maybe you could post them to this link.)
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)https://postimg.cc/XBqcSTLq
edit to say it looks like these links work.
MLAA
(18,639 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Kali
(55,820 posts)give me an older large-animal country vet who deals in reality.
sorry for your loss.
don't feel any guilt for not spending more on the crisis, they get you in your emotions and have the technology to do all kinds of things that probably aren't the best idea for animals.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)somewhere I didn't know the roads.
SarahD
(1,732 posts)Being in a dog-human relationship is generally very happy and positive. This is the part that sucks, as my brother said when he lost his dog buddy.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)FloridaBlues
(4,376 posts)Your beloved dog. In time another one will put a smile on your face.
Your area sounds beautiful. Heres hoping for a new start in 2024. One day at a time.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)I pulled a tick off of him then.
Maraya1969
(23,014 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Frasier Balzov
(3,521 posts)If we are lucky, we leave this life with multiple pet-shaped holes in our heart.
Kindest comfort to you at this time of yet another loss.
Life is still worth living. It may surprise you how worthwhile!
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)louslobbs
(3,416 posts)Thank you for sharing .stay strong ❤️?🩹
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Permanut
(6,697 posts)Thanks for sharing your story. So he could open doors - We haven't had a pup that could do that, and I'm not gonna let Jake the Chihuahua know about that trick.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)ms liberty
(9,853 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)sinkingfeeling
(53,104 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Nictuku
(3,875 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)KatK
(213 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Hotler
(12,300 posts)https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epitaph_to_a_Dog
https://poets.org/poem/epitaph-dog
When some proud Son of Man returns to Earth,
Unknown to Glory but upheld by Birth,
The sculptor's art exhausts the pomp of woe,
And storied urns record who rests below:
When all is done, upon the Tomb is seen
Not what he was, but what he should have been.
But the poor Dog, in life the firmest friend,
The first to welcome, foremost to defend,
Whose honest heart is still his Master's own,
Who labours, fights, lives, breathes for him alone,
Unhonour'd falls, unnotic'd all his worth,
Deny'd in heaven the Soul he held on earth:
While man, vain insect! hopes to be forgiven,
And claims himself a sole exclusive heaven.
Oh man! thou feeble tenant of an hour,
Debas'd by slavery, or corrupt by power,
Who knows thee well, must quit thee with disgust,
Degraded mass of animated dust!
Thy love is lust, thy friendship all a cheat,
Thy tongue hypocrisy, thy heart deceit!
By nature vile, ennobled but by name,
Each kindred brute might bid thee blush for shame.
Ye! who behold perchance this simple urn,
Pass on, it honors none you wish to mourn.
To mark a friend's remains these stones arise;
I never knew but oneand here he lies.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)70sEraVet
(4,181 posts)Hope this next year brings a little joy.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Mr.Bill
(24,821 posts)of wonderful memories. One of my dogs is entering her final chapter, I think. She's a rescue mutt that is at least 16 years old. we've had her since 2009. She is still eating okay and doesn't appear to be in any pain, but she is mostly blind and deaf. When the time comes, we will let her go, and have our memories of our own.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Skittles
(159,785 posts)it's so hard to lose our fur babies
Grieve not
nor speak of me with tears
but laugh and talk of me
as if I were beside you
I loved you so
twas Heaven here with you
- Isla Paschal Richardson
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)progressoid
(50,767 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)LoisB
(8,833 posts)I am also sorry for the loss of your partner. Sharing a loss does not lessen the grief for that loss but many shoulders can bear more than two.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Ocelot II
(121,167 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)BigmanPigman
(52,328 posts)And they never, ever live long enough.
I know this very well. All of the wishes on the birthday cake candles I blew during my lifetime were the same, "Make my baby live forever" since I knew/know how brutal it is and always will be to lose them. A dog is more than a mere "best friend". Rainbow Bridge made me sad. They said we would reunite after I die but while I am still alive how do you continue and go on like it has been, every single day of our shared lives of non-stop kisses, tail wags and unconditional love. People do not do this, dogs always do this. That is why I feel they are above humans in many ways.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Joinfortmill
(16,535 posts)And will be for as long as you need him. How do I know this? Because I am old, and when you are old the Universe whispers to you. You just need to listen. Peace to you, my fellow traveler.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)usonian
(14,220 posts)Take comfort in that. Its the survivors who grieve.
Im up in the Sierra foothills, and have one of those boulders sitting on my west slope. I estimate it at 50 tons. Other rocks are perched precariously on rocky slopes. I havent had a geologist up here, but the best guess as to their placement is that a glacier lifted them up and left them in place when it receded. Its easy to stop pushing a rock uphill and damn hard to stop it from falling onto a three-point landing!
There is healing power in nature, in music and in good friends. May you have them in abundance.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)peacebuzzard
(5,282 posts)it hurts so much to lose a best friend. It is so hard to share in words the depth of the loss. I am so very sorry for you and your friend was so brave trying to hide his pain from you. He knew; he didn't want to cause you another loss.
I have also had stories I didn't share because it hurt so much. And thank you for sharing, it helps all of us who have had losses by sharing your brief story of your best friend. Hugs, ((()))) Your post brought many memories of my sweet friends, my kids I used to call them who sadly have completed their lives with me. Best wishes for the New Year.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)PlutosHeart
(1,445 posts)Am pretty speechless. Dear goodness of everything bless you. Bless your poor pup.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)MontanaMama
(24,062 posts)Im so so sorry for your loss. I wish Id known your beloved dog. What an amazing soul. These are very hard days, I know.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)onecaliberal
(36,125 posts)Im so sorry.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Bluethroughu
(5,823 posts)My heart breaks for you.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)rambler_american
(850 posts)The Power of the Dog
Rudyard Kipling
1865 1936
There is sorrow enough in the natural way
From men and women to fill our day;
And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
Why do we always arrange for more?
Brothers and Sisters, I bid you beware
Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
Buy a pup and your money will buy
Love unflinching that cannot lie
Perfect passion and worship fed
By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
Nevertheless it is hardly fair
To risk your heart for a dog to tear.
When the fourteen years which Nature permits
Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,
And the vets unspoken prescription runs
To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
Then you will findits your own affair
But
youve given your heart to a dog to tear.
When the body that lived at your single will,
With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!).
When the spirit that answered your every mood
Is gonewherever it goesfor good,
You will discover how much you care,
And will give your heart to a dog to tear.
Weve sorrow enough in the natural way,
When it comes to burying Christian clay.
Our loves are not given, but only lent,
At compound interest of cent per cent.
Though it is not always the case, I believe,
That the longer weve kept em, the more do we grieve:
For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
A short-time loan is as bad as a long
So why inHeaven (before we are there)
Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?
This poem is in the public domain.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)SlimJimmy
(3,251 posts)live about two more weeks. It was two weeks to the day when she passed. Even though she was 15 years old, it was like losing a family member; a lot of tears were shed. The good news is that she died in her sleep at home in her bed. A gentle passing for a truly gentle dog.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)candles for both our dogs.
niyad
(120,328 posts)by love as she crossed.
SlimJimmy
(3,251 posts)She got lots of pets and kisses before she fell asleep and passed.
Ligyron
(7,904 posts)Who has had a dog and never lost it? Yet after a time, sorrow gives way to pleasant memories and even laughter at all the fun, all the adventures that were once had together and the downright crazy things our friends did sometimes.
I too had a little friend I lost not too long ago and I've got this crazy idea recently he may have been reincarnated and I'll be darned if I'm not just crazy enough to go look for him too.
Something tells me I'm going to find him.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Camaromjr
(43 posts)Pets bring out the very best in us. It is the passing of a beloved family member.
Peace
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Not Heidi
(1,462 posts)I wish I had other words for you, some that would be capable of imparting the comfort I mean to convey.
I'm so sorry you've lost your dog. 🫂
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)He would find a stick and parade around with it, in a "look what I got" manner, but never bring it to be thrown. If I picked up a stick or ball and tossed it he would get it but never deliver.
Not Heidi
(1,462 posts)Silly creeches. We love them beyond measure.
May I ask, what was your dog's name?
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)waterwatcher123
(266 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)virgdem
(2,207 posts)It's so hard losing our best friends. I still grieve kitties that I lost over 20 years ago.
Wishing you peace and light at this difficult time. 💔
virgdem
(2,207 posts)It's so hard losing our best friends. I still grieve kitties that I lost over 20 years ago.
Wishing you peace and light at this difficult time. 💔
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)virgdem
(2,207 posts)May you have a very happy new year. Who knows, maybe a new best friend will appear when you least expect it.
LetMyPeopleVote
(155,007 posts)It is hard to say goodbye to a member of the family
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)montanacowboy
(6,321 posts)we pet owners all know we have to feel this pain when the day comes; it's like a knife to your heart. I remember having a dream a long time ago not long after I had lost two Aussies. I was standing in a house with large windows and looked out the window and saw a bus; my two Aussie girls were on the bus. When I saw them I was overjoyed and ran out to get on the bus when I was somehow stopped and I heard them saying, no, you can't get on the bus this time, and they drove away. It took me a while to get over that but I feel the message was clear. We all take that bus in our own time and hopefully we will be reunited.
Peace.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Your note reminded me of a dream I had during my early college days. I spent the night above a mortuary having accepted the job of answering the phone if there was a body to be picked up. The place to stay didn't cost anything it was in exchange for answering the phone. If I would help going out to pick up bodies I would be paid for that time. In the dream I had that night I was in a church kneeling at an alter, there were candles burning in a rack off to my right. I was asking in my prayer "What is real?" And a voice finally answered "It's all real." That caused me to laugh and cry at the same time. I went out a side door of the church and sat on some steps in an alcove that led up to the door. Several of my friends came by on the sidewalk and asked if I was alright as I sat there laughing and crying. All I could do was thank them for their concern and tell them i was just fine. Waking up from that dream I felt I wasn't ready for that big a hit of religion, excused myself from the job and took the job out of town staying in a trailer helping a father in the mornings and the son in the afternoons milk their cows on a dairy. Thank you for the reply montanacowboy, I feel reunited with his spirit every time I think of him.
montanacowboy
(6,321 posts)those that we remember have a deep and special meaning and maybe they are meant to guide us
littlemissmartypants
(25,659 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)marble falls
(62,378 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Trueblue Texan
(2,972 posts)I know the depths of that grief, how I know. My heart aches for you and I hope your grief is somehow lightened by joyful memories of your best friend. Peace and love to you.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Ladythatvotesblue
(222 posts)So sorry.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)thatcrowwoman
(1,230 posts)What a wonderful life you shared, and what a profound loss of your best friend.
Hes still snuggled deep in your heart and soul and memories, yes?
Many thanks for sharing here, where someone is always here for you
as you mourn your loss and celebrate your lives entwined.
May you be surrounded by love and light, by protection, and by peace, that sweet shalom,
and may you always find whatever help you may need.
🕊🩵💫🎶thatcrowwoman
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Today I went to visit a friend and neighbor who is 92. We watched a Gay Liberation Documentary on Los Angles activists. Learned some things.
barbtries
(29,884 posts)for both of your losses.
So you had a great loss associated with Thanksgiving and now another one associated with Christmas. As if the holidays aren't hard enough already for many of us.
both of my parents died on 23Nov, my dad in 1968 and mom in 1980. Their anniversary fell on thanksgiving this year.
my oldest son might be interested in that land - is it already developed? He lives in LA but is wanting to move north, but wherever he goes he must be near the ocean.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)but it takes 30 minutes to reach the coast at Fort Ross. If he wants to be closer and on paved roads he might check out Timber Cove properties. Further North is The Sea Ranch.
JoseBalow
(5,382 posts)Please accept my sympathy
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Elessar Zappa
(16,010 posts)Losing a beloved family member is awful, Ive been there. I firmly believe your dog is in the happy hunting grounds of his dreams.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Saoirse9
(3,815 posts)Your place sounds like a dog's paradise. A human's paradise too. Thank you for sharing your story I loved reading it. You'll miss him. But he's at peace and out of pain.
We lost our dog about a month ago. We have another dog who we adore but I miss the old man so much. He had a quirky personality and made us laugh a lot.
We have all had to say goodbye to beloved dogs. Not all of us have had to say goodbye to our partner of decades though. That must have been wrenching. Be kind to yourself.
A happy and Healthy New Year to you.
Much love.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Glad you enjoyed my story too.
Saoirse9
(3,815 posts)He had a very rough first 4 years and then we gave him a happy life. I will always miss him and wish that we could have given him a completely pain free existence. I know that sounds silly.
I wish you joy in your little slice of paradise.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)ZonkerHarris
(25,331 posts)I too had to make a hard choice 6 years ago on Christmas Day to end my dogs suffering.
worst Holiday ever
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)The loss on a holiday seems to have more impact. My sympathy,
crimycarny
(1,638 posts)I'm so sorry for the loss of your partner and your dog. I lost my son to suicide almost two years ago (it will be two years in January of 2024). We adopted/rescued our dog when my son was around 8 years old. It was the first dog our kids had. He was a flat-coated Retriever, a breed I'd never heard of until we adopted our beloved FCR.
My son grew very close to Chewie, our FCR. He used some form of the name "Chewie" in all of his social media accounts.
Needless to say, our worlds were destroyed when my son died (we had no idea he was struggling--he hid it well). When my son died Chewie was 17 years old, which is very unusual for a Flat Coated Retriever as they have an average life span of 8-10 years due to a tendency towards cancer. Chewie lasted another year and 1 month to the day after my son's death. I swear he hung on to help our family through that first terrible year.
Right before reading your post, I was listening to a guided meditation that helps you visit your past loved ones in the spirit world. I pictured meeting my son in a beautiful place with Chewie by his side.
Not sure if it will help you but here is the guided meditation. It's about 16 minutes in when you envision your loved one. It was very powerful for me.
Again, so sorry for your loss. Grief is so very very hard.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)orangecrush
(21,995 posts)I know what it means to love a fur baby
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Wicked Blue
(6,703 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)cate94
(2,890 posts)Im sorry for your loss, both now and 6 years ago.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)UpInArms
(51,841 posts)My heart hugs yours
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Attilatheblond
(4,376 posts)But love, well, it lasts, and in time, may you see that love you got and gave is still with you, in a different form. You'll see it, he will find a way to let you know.
Be kind to yourself, he would probably insist on that.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Attilatheblond
(4,376 posts)My nick name was given to me by a dear friend who really got my character. LOL
I do hope you are doing as well as can be expected after such a loss. Wishing you peace and lovely memories.
JustAnotherGen
(33,701 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Duncanpup
(13,732 posts)AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)gay texan
(2,890 posts)But just know, when you are ready, there is another 4 legged soul waiting for its forever home.
Time is needed
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Arne
(3,606 posts)Our two Yorkie mutts are buried there.
What I remember is they had long good lives.
So sorry.
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Arne
(3,606 posts)Actually have the wheel and a kiln but
found out it's not my thing.
May attempt a cup for the new year. lol
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,886 posts)Bayard
(24,145 posts)It never gets any easier to lose our fur kids. It leaves a big hole in your heart. Rest assured, he knew that you loved him.
We're with you on losing your partner too. There are always strong shoulders to cry on, and hugs to be had.
Take care of yourself, and keep us posted.
Peace.