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Fri Oct 19, 2012, 01:55 AM

Still so sad :(

Really sad still about the loss of my Old Kitty and Flame less than one year ago now.

I saw an advertisement from the local shelter and they have a cat there that looks like Flame, so I went to see him today. He was not at all like Flame really and he was not in the best of spirits as he'd been neutered a few days ago.

He was said to be 4 years old and healthy. I looked him over and noted he had the beginnings of that damned skin cancer around one of his ears as well as a bunch of black specks (flea eggs?) in and around his ears.

I pointed these things out to the shelter and they acted like they did not hear me. After this, the cat bit me on the hand and they closed the door and said, "He's done".

I guess he was not the cat for me. I don't think he liked other cats from what I was told so he probably wouldn't have gotten along with my only remaining cat Jules.

Oh well .... I tried I guess.

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Reply Still so sad :( (Original post)
CountAllVotes Oct 2012 OP
TorchTheWitch Oct 2012 #1
ginnyinWI Oct 2012 #2
CountAllVotes Oct 2012 #3
Curmudgeoness Oct 2012 #4
CountAllVotes Oct 2012 #5
Stinky The Clown Oct 2012 #6

Response to CountAllVotes (Original post)

Fri Oct 19, 2012, 02:38 AM

1. Keep trying

And don't pay attention to how the cat looks (as in color/markings that remind you of your lost lovey kitties). Look for personality that sparks your interest and tugs at your heart strings. A new kitty may remind you in some ways of either of the two you lost but they will be themselves. You can never replace the ones you lost, but you can open your heart to a new lovey kitty and love them just as much as the ones that went before.

Just keep your options open. It may be that now is just too soon for another kitty to really tug at your heart, but don't close the door on trying. At some point you'll meet one that you'll know is for you, and though they may remind you of your lost ones will still be uniquely themselves.

This shelter doesn't seem interested in keeping the animals all healthy and clean (if that one cat has fleas, the whole place has them). Try ads at the pet shops or at the various vets in your area for kitties that need new homes and visit the ones that spark your interest. Or try another shelter or rescue group that looks out properly for the health of their charges awaiting adoption.

Just keep trying... somewhere a new lovey kitty that's just right for you is waiting, and you'll just know him or her when you find that special one.

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Response to TorchTheWitch (Reply #1)

Fri Oct 19, 2012, 08:53 AM

2. I would have written the same thing--great reply

Look for personality first. And keep in mind that cats might be a little more subdued/shy in a shelter situation, especially if they haven't been there for long. After about two weeks they settle into the routine and feel a bit more comfortable. I have worked with cats at my shelter for over a year and observed hundreds of them. I will say, though, that kittens under about four months seem to just be kittens, no matter where they are! They can't resist playing, climbing, and looking for attention!

Decide what you need in a cat, whether it is responsiveness, affection, purring, playfulness, silky fur (that's one of mine), and its size and sex, especially if you are going to try to match it to one you already have. The color of the fur doesn't really indicate personality, in my experience. I have seen shy and bold tabbies, social and withdrawn tuxedos, and the long haired cats can be any personality too.

Some shelters, like the one I volunteer at, do personality ratings on their cats and dogs, which can help you out. Because, like I was saying, being scared or stressed can make some of them seem dysfunctional, when in a home setting they would be fine.

Good Luck! I like to think of it this way: all cats share the same great cat soul, and when one leaves your life, you can get him or her back, in a way, when you adopt your next one.

here is a nationwide data base you can try: http://www.petfinder.com/index.html

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Response to TorchTheWitch (Reply #1)

Fri Oct 19, 2012, 10:32 AM

3. You are right

It is too soon. I miss both of them so much and I still cry every day about them.

I sometimes think that Jules is lonely, I'm finding myself calling her "lonely little Jules". She hides in the bushes in the backyard a lot and cries a lot now all of the time.

Recently, a tomcat was coming around at night and serenading her for hours on end (she is spayed and why this was happening I do not know). She would watch out the window for him every night hoping he'd be there. He hasn't been around lately and I don't know what happened to him. Jules liked that I lot; I didn't mind it really. No harm done.

Poor lonely little Jules and poor lonely and oh what a very sad CountAllVotes.

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Response to CountAllVotes (Reply #3)

Fri Oct 19, 2012, 12:22 PM

4. Sounds like you should have rounded up that tomcat.

Made him yours and Jules'. I know the sadness you are feeling, and it will never leave you as long as you can remember. I lost my two cats within 6 months of each other and was left catless. After one month, I knew I couldn't go on without a cat in my life....so I started looking at cats at rescue shelters. The one I finally adopted was shown in a "cat house" where they roam around the room free, so they appear to be happier than in a cage. He was not at all what I was looking for...a long skinny cat with an odd shaped head. But he jumped up on a banister and walked right up to my face and head-butted me. It isn't always the cat we think we are looking for that steals our heart.

Keep looking. Find other rescue groups who may treat the cats differently. And know that there is no hurry.

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Response to Curmudgeoness (Reply #4)

Fri Oct 19, 2012, 01:35 PM

5. The tomcat may have belonged to someone

I don't think he is a stray, he was just out and around for a few nights.

He seemed too healthy to be a stray.

However, little Jules sure liked him and she spent her whole nights waiting and looking for him to return which he did for a few weeks and then he went away.

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Response to CountAllVotes (Original post)

Fri Oct 19, 2012, 02:56 PM

6. ......

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