I'm finding this harder than I want to admit, to myself or anyone else.

[Denninmi]

It is a year this week, the 22nd to be exact, that my life changed permanently and irrevocably. And, I was initially worried that these anniversaries would bother me or cause problems. Thn I had a period where I was very confident they would be no problem at all, sail on through. Well, it's bothering me more than I like to admit to myself. A year out, and it is all so fresh and vivid in my mind.

And I am spooked about it. And this is one of those days I am very grateful I have therapy, because I can't get there fast enough.

I know I'm going to be ok, it's just that getting there looks to be very unpleasant.

[ZombieHorde]

1. (((HUG)))

I wish you well.

[Denninmi]

2. Thanks.

I keep reminding myself what the psychiatrist said to me on Thursday, which was "anxiety is not dangerous. Recognize it for what it is." She told me to cry and puke if I had to.

Hey, I'm great at both of those sports, so I should have this in the bag. Maybe I can get those last five pounds off this way -Silver Linings and all.

I'm also wrapped tightly in my version of a shot of whiskey, I'm working my way through the entire discography of U2 today. I'm in the middle of Zooropa right now. Works for me

[ZombieHorde]

3. Ha! Enjoy your tunes and heal well. nt

[LiberalEsto]

4. Hang in there, you will get through it.

You're a survivor, Denninmi. We've all been witness to that.

Have you heard of something called EMDR - eye movement desensitization and reprocessing?
It's used in treating PTSD. Someone I know - a therapist - said it could be used to work through fears.

Link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eye_movement_desensitization_and_reprocessing

[Denninmi]

5. I keep hearing about that.

Is it like what they did in 'A Clockwork Orange'?

I should ask one of them about it. My case may not be serious enough for drastic measures, since I'm not even on meds for it right now.

[LiberalEsto]

6. Didn't see Clockwork Orange

I read the book long ago and it scared the daylights out of me.

Ask a therapist whether it might help you.

[hunter]

7. I've met people who say it works.

I was too paranoid at the time to try it, and now have little reason to as my current meds seem to be adequate.

(Going without meds has never worked for me and I've got the burned bridges to prove it.)

[PasadenaTrudy]

10. It works

I loved EMDR for dealing with losing my dad. Only thing that worked.

[HereSince1628]

11. It has NOTHING to do with the eye-movement except that eye movement

is benign.

The idea is to shift the response of triggers to less arousing and less emotional damaging memories.

If you scratched your knee rather than did eye movement the result would be the same.

[hunter]

8. Looks to me like you are making good progress.

[Bertha Venation]

9. Denninmi

[mopinko]

12. you're so much stronger now.

celebrate it.