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Mon Apr 29, 2013, 03:40 PM

When I'm depressed, the first thing that goes is my creativity.

Drawing, writing, poetry, music... Just about every art form you throw at me, I can figure out and do. But depression steals it away. I say, "yeah I'm good at it, but I could do more with my life..." I say that and people say "do something else then." Never really understanding...

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Reply When I'm depressed, the first thing that goes is my creativity. (Original post)
Neoma Apr 2013 OP
libodem Apr 2013 #1
libodem Apr 2013 #2
Neoma Apr 2013 #5
libodem Apr 2013 #7
LiberalEsto Apr 2013 #3
olddots Apr 2013 #4
Neoma Apr 2013 #6
Locut0s May 2013 #8

Response to Neoma (Original post)

Mon Apr 29, 2013, 04:02 PM

1. Sucks it out of you

I have a tough time differentiating between feeling really tired, being sick, or increased depression. It all feels similar to me. I get inertia. I just can't get off the ground. One of my sayings is I'm gunna do something even if it's wrong. Just to get started. Draw a black scribble to represent your mood, girl. It will get you started.

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Response to Neoma (Original post)

Mon Apr 29, 2013, 04:39 PM

2. Hope you feel better soon

Do you ever think that creativity and that surge of energy one has on the higher end of bipolar, kind of go together? I'm hoping you get your mojo back. I just have chronic depression without the opposing mood. All my friends and family really miss the manic phase, when it is drugged out of them.

Hope I'm making sense? I'm trying to be empathetic but maybe I'm missing the mark?

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Response to libodem (Reply #2)

Mon Apr 29, 2013, 06:44 PM

5. Being bipolar has a direct link to creativity from what I can tell.

But I can be creative when I'm content. Looking back, I had manic attacks as a kid as well, but we called them "sugar rushes."

The main thing is I don't see the point in life, or even in expressing myself when I'm depressed. I don't see the point since everything else is shit anyways I guess. Not that it's my life that's shit at the moment. (Though I've been through too much for someone my age and there's good reasons I was triggered into bipolar.) It's more like all the information I process about environmental destruction, or our political policies... I know too much and it hurts me so. But you can't tell me to not know this stuff...

Some of this might change once college rolls around. Meet new people and get a good social life going again. That helps immensely.

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Response to Neoma (Reply #5)

Tue Apr 30, 2013, 12:20 AM

7. Being sensitive has it's down side

It can deplete your energy rather than build it. Sometimes I have to be alone to recharge. Sometimes I need to be around good people. Put a little light of protection around yourself to guard against emotional and mental "vampires" that drain you rather than recharge you. Get a good nights rest and maybe it won't seem so bleak in the morning.

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Response to Neoma (Original post)

Mon Apr 29, 2013, 04:47 PM

3. I hear you, Neoma

 

It happens to me too.

I hope you find a way to work around it and feel better.

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Response to Neoma (Original post)

Mon Apr 29, 2013, 06:38 PM

4. Do you feel blocked like you're repeating the same work ?

 

Neoma I bet you live creatively which also means you're sensitive in a world where sensitivity gets a bad wrap .

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Response to olddots (Reply #4)

Mon Apr 29, 2013, 07:54 PM

6. Over time my drawings took hours to do.

Detailed to a fault I guess. Because after one of them, I haven't fully gone back to drawing. It took a full week to finish that one. Guess I got burnt out...

I can show yah some in Du mail if interested.

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Response to Neoma (Original post)

Wed May 15, 2013, 09:25 PM

8. For me what goes is drive. I can still think up lots of creative ideas but...

My drive to do any of them goes completely out the window. There are at least 10 things I know I should be doing right now that would help me but I just don't care enough about my life to do any of them. For example my interests are science and computers. I've been telling myself for I don't know how long to learn to use Linux, program in C++ now that I know C, read up on a bunch of back issues of Scientific American that I have pilling up, teach myself some more complex Physic and Math, and on and on. These are all things that would greatly interest me at other times. But when I'm depressed like I have been for years I just say, yup looks interesting, but I just don't have the mental energy. Oh well, I'll just sleep instead and maybe my life will end peacefully.

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