NC Considers Making Sea Level Rise Illegal

[Webster Green]

Brilliant approach to global warming solutions

"Here’s a link to the circulated Replacement House Bill 819. The key language is in section 2, paragraph e, talking about rates of sea level rise: “These rates shall only be determined using historical data, and these data shall be limited to the time period following the year 1900. Rates of seas-level rise may be extrapolated linearly. …” It goes on, but there’s the core: North Carolina legislators have decided that the way to make exponential increases in sea level rise – caused by those inconvenient feedback loops we keep hearing about from scientists – go away is to make it against the law to extrapolate exponential; we can only extrapolate along a line predicted by previous sea level rises.

Which, yes, is exactly like saying, do not predict tomorrow’s weather based on radar images of a hurricane swirling offshore, moving west towards us with 60-mph winds and ten inches of rain. Predict the weather based on the last two weeks of fair weather with gentle breezes towards the east. Don’t use radar and barometers; use the Farmer’s Almanac and what grandpa remembers."

http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/plugged-in/2012/05/30/nc-makes-sea-level-rise-illegal/

[elleng]

1. Right, FORBID!

[longship]

2. NC Outlaws Hurricanes!

In a recent bill, signed into law by North Carolina's governor and overwhelmingly supported by the state's legislature, hurricanes will be fined $100,000 and imprisoned for five years for each day said hurricane takes residence in the state. This is one of many similar legislative efforts made recently by states on the east coast as this year's hurricane season begins.

At the signing ceremony covered nationally, the governor said, "We are sick and tired of these immigrants coming onto our shores with no documents, not even a birth certificate. Here in North Carolina we will hold all these alien entities to the immigration laws of the land. If our Muslim, Kenyan-born president doesn't enforce the law, we have no choice but to take action into our own hands."

Rumor has it that Florida has rebuilt "Old Sparky" their decades old electric chair which has not been used for years and is considering a new death penalty law for immigrant hurricanes.

Answering the criticism from NOAA that this is the weather that we get and they are natural, the Florida governor responded, "NOAA is a known socialist conspiracy in cahoots with socialist climate scientists, many of whom don't even live in Amercia. We will hold these criminal storms accountable for their crimes. We're going to burn them here in Florida."