Today I got upset with someone at work...was I in the wrong?

[WillParkinson]

This morning one of my co-workers called to ask about a breakfast function for tomorrow morning. I told her that I would check into it and let her know what I found out. I walked into the pastry shop where I work and the lead person there pointed and me and said, "Like him." I said, "What about me?" and she replied, "You're kind of snotty."

I barely know this woman. She used to work in the restaurant upstairs and I've seen her a handful of times. She said it in a room with 3 other people, 2 of whom I've never really met. I got upset and said, "EXCUSE ME?" to which she said, "I was just kidding."

I asked my question (so I could at least let the co-worker know about the function) and walked away without saying anything else. I was very angry the remainder of the day. I spoke with my manager about it as well. Now, nearly 12 hours later, I'm still angry about it. Was I in the wrong? Should I have just laughed it off? I realize I'm easily irritated, especially lately, and need someone with a level head to tell me if I'm justified with my annoyance.

Thanks!

Will

[bluesbassman]

1. You could've said: "Yeah, and that's with people I like".

FWIW, I would've been annoyed too, but perhaps snide comments are just her way of breaking the ice. I'd let it go this time, but not a second.

[WillParkinson]

4. Will do my best...

Thanks for the advice.

[edgineered]

2. Fortune cookie said, "He who stays mad the longest loses." Enjoy your crow.

[WillParkinson]

5. Not really sure what you mean...

But I'm going to try to let it go.

[Kali]

3. justified

but maybe not for 12 hours

try this: what does someone see that might be described as snotty? maybe a person with good taste and grooming, who acts professional. slacker gossips might describe that as snotty

[WillParkinson]

6. Thanks Kali...

I work very hard to maintain myself at work. I try to be decent with everyone. I think the fact that she said it in a room with people I did not know is what upset me the most. Even if she said she was just kidding I don't want this to color their perception of me. But I'm going to try to let it go (never easy for me).

:breathe:
:breathe:
:breathe:

Ahhhhh.

OK, maybe later.

[irisblue]

7. couple of thoughts

on reading this...she looked like a rude jerk...where is she in your company to you? can she negativly impact you? does she have a rep as a bully? or a mean girl? i can see your being upset, have there been other instances in your company of tolerated bullying/"it-was-only-a-joke-so-lighten-up-barbed-comments. when you spoke to your mamager what did s/he say about it? maybe it was a one off, maybe not, but as a former victim of badwork situations, statring a log of interactions, offsite, isn't a bad idea, it may be a one off, it may not. note the details, witnesses, your bosses responses and try not to interact with that woman without a witness present. good luck. now let it go...it'll ruin your digestion and annoy your heart chakra

[Moondog]

8. My rule was always

"it's unprofessional to be mad for more than an hour."

YMMV.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

10. and always keep you personal life separate from your professional life, right?

[chrisa]

9. That's like telling someone to go eff themselves, and that they're an annoying POS,

and then saying at the end, "Oh, I was only kidding!"

She must have been raised by wolves.

[seabeyond]

11. i probably would not have hung onto the anger nearly as long as you, but i would

probably have handled the situation like you. not the excuse me..... but just go into ask what i needed and walk out.

i doubt i would be friendly with her in the future, so if she thinks me snotty now.... well, lol. but ya, i am not into people judging me in that manner and talking behind back, ect.... she wouldnt have another thought in my brain. done. she is insignificant.

not everyone has to like me. i dont have to like everyone else.

[Baitball Blogger]

12. Was she cute?

Could have been a come on. Kind of twisted, but maybe her way of trying to see if you were interested?

[siligut]

13. You are not in the wrong

It would seem that this woman was talking about people who she believes to be snotty. Maybe she thought she was being clever using you as a convenient example. She was really being a gossip and that should not be tolerated in the workplace. If you are introverted, that may be why she thinks you are snotty and combating gossip can be rough. You may have to make an effort to explain to her you are introspective and sensitive.