Wed Dec 28, 2011, 08:20 PM
Stuart G (29,897 posts)
A Joke about Tom's scrotum....an old one..#9Last edited Wed Dec 28, 2011, 10:00 PM - Edit history (1)
And it was at the church that this happened...
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him." You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagine the pain that poor Tom must have experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place." Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom. "Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say. A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath. "I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum, not scrotum ."
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6 replies, 6402 views
Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
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Author | Time | Post |
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Stuart G | Dec 2011 | OP |
Fredge | Dec 2011 | #1 | |
BootinUp | Dec 2011 | #2 | |
UTUSN | Dec 2011 | #3 | |
Stuart G | Dec 2011 | #4 | |
hunter | Dec 2011 | #6 | |
MiddleFingerMom | Dec 2011 | #5 |
Response to Stuart G (Original post)
Wed Dec 28, 2011, 09:10 PM
Fredge (25 posts)
1. Lol
Scrotum.... would've sucked.
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Response to Stuart G (Original post)
Wed Dec 28, 2011, 09:18 PM
BootinUp (40,277 posts)
2. hahahaha nt
Response to Stuart G (Original post)
Wed Dec 28, 2011, 09:52 PM
UTUSN (58,152 posts)
3. Is this a joke?!1 (I didn't read the whole thing.) n/t
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Response to UTUSN (Reply #3)
Wed Dec 28, 2011, 09:57 PM
Stuart G (29,897 posts)
4. UTUSN...it is a joke..read the whole thing...
The humor is in reading the entire story.....and then the last line makes you laugh...
and it is not real..this did not happen to someone.. .it is a joke, someone, not me, made it up..years ago... ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Response to Stuart G (Reply #4)
Thu Dec 29, 2011, 06:26 PM
hunter (32,498 posts)
6. Here's a real one from Snopes...
http://www.snopes.com/risque/penile/scrotum.asp
A man staples his scrotum back together after slicing it open while masturbating with machine shop equipment... Did he mean he didn't read the entire story, or couldn't[/l]??? |
Response to Stuart G (Original post)
Thu Dec 29, 2011, 01:20 AM
MiddleFingerMom (25,163 posts)
5. I wish I had known this months ago. After my open-heart surgery, they wired my sternum together.
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. . What makes me DOUBLY glad that it wasn't my scrotum is the fact that the wiring fell apart and they had to cut my pectoral (chest) muscle and stretch it to help hold my sternum together. . . If it had been my scrotum, I shudder to think of what they would have had to cut (and OWWIE... stretch) to hold it together. . . . . . . . I'll NOT be in my bunk. . . . |