Facebook's stock may have dipped, but mine remains stable at "worth jack shit" per share

[Amerigo Vespucci]

If you want to avoid those pesky brokerages, just PM your credit card number and I'll hook you up with as many shares in my global concern, "PoochCo," as you'd like (only $250 a share...if you have grandkids, this is an offer you can't turn down. And if you don't have grandkids, this is an offer you can't turn down).