'Americans: why not pretend to be Canadian?'

[marmar]

London 2012: an etiquette guide for Olympics visitors
How do you hire a Boris bike? Why are Brits always saying sorry? Do you look a bit like a terrorist? Find the answers in this guide for foreign visitors

Tim Dowling
guardian.co.uk, Monday 16 July 2012


The 8,000 volunteers who will welcome international visitors to London 2012 have been issued with a 66-page instruction manual, covering everything from foreign etiquette to uniform care and advice on dealing with journalists. But what of the visitors themselves? Could they not do with a manual outlining the customs, manners and practicalities of the islands they are visiting? We hereby present a simple guide to UK etiquette for the 2012 Olympics.

• Welcome, and before we begin – please accept our apologies. Your four-hour nightmare wait at passport control should not be taken as a symptom of Britain's contempt for foreigners. It is merely a symptom of a woeful lack of spending on a key aspect of travel infrastructure in the run-up to a hugely important event. In other words, it's the government that hates you. Don't worry, they hate us too.

• Canadians: I'm afraid that while you are here you will be repeatedly mistaken for Americans and blamed for all sorts of stuff you had nothing to do with. Unless you can think of a quick and simple way to distinguish yourselves at a glance – flower in lapel? Saddle shoes? Maple leaf eyepatch? – then you are just going to have to suck it up.

• Americans: While you're here, why not pretend to be Canadian? Very few Britons can tell the difference, and it will allow you to rescue yourself from awkward conversations about the death penalty. .......................(more)

The complete piece is at: http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2012/jul/16/etiquette-guide-visitors-london-olympics

[teddy51]

1. Give Harper a bit more time and Canadians will probably not want to admit there

citizenship well over sea's.

[MADem]

2. That is rather hilarious!

This bit (besides the East End snark and the remark about the Boris Bike bank advert) appealed the most to me: http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2012/jul/16/etiquette-guide-visitors-london-olympics?commentpage=2#start-of-comments

• Pay no attention to those bow-tied etiquette experts you sometimes see on CNN International, telling you how to behave while in Britain. These people are generally of dubious provenance, normally live in California and tend to peddle advice that is either irrelevant or out of date. For example, they will often say that Britons love queuing and are so fond of apologising that they will often say "sorry" even when something isn't their fault. In reality, Britons are just as likely to jump to the front of a queue and then punch the person behind them for coughing. It all depends on how muggy it is.

• British people may seem to apologise a lot, but it doesn't quite mean the same thing here. In the UK, "I'm sorry" actually means either a) I didn't hear you; b) I didn't understand you; or c) I both heard and understood you, and I think you're an idiot.

• You might expect locals to be, in the circumstances, a bit defensive about the weather. But it's true: it really doesn't rain like this every summer. This is exceptional, which is why it's so cold in your hotel room. There aren't normally this many soldiers in the streets either. No, honestly.....


• London's bike hire scheme couldn't be simpler, by the way: just go up to the terminal at any docking station, pay by card and take away one of our so-called "Boris bikes". When you're done with it, simply throw it into the nearest canal. They're disposable!