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Wed Jun 21, 2017, 09:25 PM

Jared & Ivankas Guide to Mindful Marriage (by Paul Rudnick in the New Yorker)

http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/06/19/jared-and-ivankas-guide-to-mindful-marriage

5. Family is everything. We treasure the special moments, like the time our kids used their crayons to make Jared a construction-paper subpoena. We have game nights, when we play such favorites as Pin the Tail on Whoever’s Out of Favor, Let’s Dress Jeff Sessions in Doll Clothes, and Who Can Hug Mommy Without Touching Her Hair?

6. We like to leave romantic Post-its for each other on our bathroom mirrors, with notes like “You’re my person of interest,” “Tonight I want you to wear your navy blazer, crisp white shirt, khakis, Weejuns, bulletproof vest—and nothing else,” and “I’d like to trademark our love and sell it to the Chinese.”

7. Love isn’t about money, influence, or pretending to walk in slow motion together across the White House lawn. It’s about glancing across a crowded reception at the other person, and smiling shyly, because both of you know that nobody can even remember who Eric or Donald, Jr., is married to.

8. Last week, we had a fun picnic with Paul Ryan and his family. We grinned as we watched Paul grab food from his kids and warn them, “You’d better not start crying or I’ll take one of your shoes.”


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Arrow 11 replies Author Time Post
Reply Jared & Ivankas Guide to Mindful Marriage (by Paul Rudnick in the New Yorker) (Original post)
ProfessorPlum Jun 2017 OP
The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2017 #1
Control-Z Jun 2017 #2
dixiegrrrrl Jun 2017 #8
FM123 Jun 2017 #3
FM123 Jun 2017 #4
unblock Jun 2017 #5
FM123 Jun 2017 #6
Duppers Jun 2017 #9
Ilsa Jun 2017 #7
czarjak Jun 2017 #10
smirkymonkey Jun 2017 #11

Response to ProfessorPlum (Original post)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 09:28 PM

1. "Never go to bed poor."

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Response to ProfessorPlum (Original post)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 09:36 PM

2. That is lol funny.

My favorite:

“You know, being Jewish might be fun, and could inspire a new signature fragrance called Oyvanka.”

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Response to Control-Z (Reply #2)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 11:26 PM

8. "Oyvanka"......

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Response to ProfessorPlum (Original post)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 09:43 PM

3. #3. Never hire a prostitute to entrap your brother-in-law

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Response to FM123 (Reply #3)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 09:50 PM

4. Actually, I could see Jared doing this exact thing to Donald Jr.

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Response to FM123 (Reply #3)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 09:51 PM

5. Omg his father actually did that!

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Response to unblock (Reply #5)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 10:04 PM

6. Then he sent the sex tape to the wife (his sister). Nice family, those Kushners.

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Response to unblock (Reply #5)

Thu Jun 22, 2017, 12:20 AM

9. Good lord!

What a nice family. Sounds mafia-like.


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Response to ProfessorPlum (Original post)

Wed Jun 21, 2017, 10:31 PM

7. My favorite:

“You know, being Jewish might be fun, and could inspire a new signature fragrance called Oyvanka.”

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Response to ProfessorPlum (Original post)

Thu Jun 22, 2017, 12:43 AM

10. "Love isn't about money?

Who's zoomin' who, Ivanka?

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Response to ProfessorPlum (Original post)

Thu Jun 22, 2017, 12:55 AM

11. "Hi. Its great to be here. Were the Madoffs."

I hope more than anything that they end up like the Madoffs!

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