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Thu Feb 16, 2017, 03:11 PM


Donald Frederickovich Trump

We have been disrespectful to our esteemed President by not using his correct name. The Russian style is to use, as a man's middle name, the patronymic, referring to his father. Thus, the dictator's father was also named Vladimir, so the dictator's full name is Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin, while his brother Viktor, who died during the Siege of Leningrad, was Viktor Vladimirovich Putin.

Frederick Trump was the President's biological father and is also the only reason he has any money. (It's widely believed that if Donald had just taken his inheritance, bought some mutual funds, and spent his time golfing and molesting women, he'd be richer than he actually is.)

The correct name of Donald Frederickovich Trump honors both his father and his current allegiance.

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