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Wed Feb 15, 2017, 02:07 PM

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #2-13: Your Friendly Neighborhood Nuclear Football Guy Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #2-13: Your Friendly Neighborhood Nuclear Football Guy Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Really? Department stores? That’s what we’re going after now? All the rest of the world’s ills have been solved? Murder? Crime? Poverty? Deadly diseases? War? Famine? Those problems have all been solved? Great. I love that David Frahm of the Atlantic called Trump the “QVC President”. So what would a listing like that be on his network? I can imagine. “Up next, we have this lovely cabinet position for you to bid on! It’s the Secretary Of Education! With this lovely cabinet position, you too can sell out the futures of the children of this great nation of ours. You will have those filthy liberal elitist universities trembling at your feet. There’s no experience in education or government required, you just have to have lots of money and the ability to support the president’s dangerous agenda lock step! All this can be yours today for the low low price of $100,000 per Senator. After all, you can’t put a price on your children’s futures. But you can definitely put a price on power, corruption, and that sweet, sweet profit. We have a caller. Betsy from Michigan, you’re on the line!” Thank you! Enough of the intro. We have a lot of idiocy to get to this week. But first John Oliver is back everybody!!! Yay!!!! And this week he absolutely destroys Trump with a segment called “Trump Vs. The Truth”:

So where do we begin this week? Well Trump gets unseated this week! Instead, Trump’s national security advisor Michael Flynn (1) takes the top spot. And there’s many areas we can go with this. At slot number two, while Trump is busy tweeting about "illegal" intelligence, he blabbed it out in the open while dining with the Japanese prime minister at Mar-A-Lago, among other fuck ups that happened there. At number 3 is also Donald Trump (3). As I said in the intro they’re going after department stores now. Ivanka Trump’s line got booted from Nordstrom and it is just driving him batshit insane. At number 4, we have to talk about the Yemen raid, something we didn’t get to cover last week. There’s so much news that it’s impossible to get everything.. Taking the number 5, we’re going to talk about how Trump flip flops more than that big fat guy at the gym pool. Taking the 6th slot is Stephen Miller (6). Trump’s professional brown shirt is channeling his inner Hitler. And if there’s anything we’re trying to teach you on this show is that you don’t go full Hitler. Never, ever go full Hitler! At number 7 is our favorite batshit crazy conspiracy theorist Alex Jones. You thought he was crazy last week? He’s turning it past 11 this week! At number 8 is New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft (8). Yes, the owner of the champs isn’t shy about being a conservative idiot, and while Patriots are jumping ship in not going to the White House, the answer coming from Kraft will leave you scratching your head. At number 9 (NEIN!!!!) this week we’re going to lighten things up and talk about basketball. You guys and gals like basketball don’t you? Well, specifically we’re going to talk about basketball’s worst team – the New York Knicks, and a battle between Charles Oakley and Carmelo Anthony. And the more you dive on this subject, the weirder it gets, and we have to talk about it! Finally this week we’re heading back to our Stupidest State Showdown! This time we’re going to the Batshit Conference where it’s a battle of the reigning Kings Of Guano (who I saw at the Troubadour last week – not that great!) – division leading rivals #3 Kentucky and #4 Texas are going to battle it out for which state is the most flat out batshit insane! And to finish, normally I would put some live music here, but now we’ve got to end with A Tribe Called Quest, and their glorious performance at the Grammys this week. You will enjoy it believe me! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[font size="8"]Michael Flynn[/font]

You know folks there’s only one organization right now in this very country in this country that could rival the Donald Trump Administration in the incompetence, recklessness, and total disregard for everybody. Nobody has pissed their fans off this much and people still stick by them. The leadership of this organization is completely insane. They’ve tanked and they have tanked quickly. I’m of course talking about the New York Knicks. Hey o!!! I kid, I kid. The main difference between the New York Knicks and the Donald Trump administration is that the Trump administration has far more important things to deal with rather than a feud between two players. Like, I don’t know matters of national security! You know during the campaign Hillary got grilled for her e-mail server, but at least she wasn’t blabbing national security matters out in the open! But first we need to talk about who Michael Flynn is, exactly:


If you’ve lost track of just who Michael T. Flynn is in the midst of the other higher profile extremists dominating the Donald Trump administration, he’s the crazy former military guy who likes chanting “Lock Her Up” and was once disciplined because he leaked classified information — and he’s deeply tied to Russia. He’s since taken on the role of Trump’s National Security Advisor. But just ten days into the administration, Trump’s other top advisors are leaking that Flynn is already on the outs.

In a lengthy insider piece published by the New York Times this week which details just how much power Steve Bannon has assumed over the White House, the consistent focus of the piece is that Michael Flynn has quickly talked himself into being on the outs with Trump. The profile paints Flynn as being more or less unable to stop talking, to the point that his rambling answer during Trump’s meeting with British Prime Minister Theresa May left Trump embarrassed.

Trump also fired Flynn’s son for spreading the false information which led to a near-shooting at a Brooklyn pizzeria. And various members of Trump’s brand new cabinet have grown so concerned with Flynn’s behavior that they’ve called meetings just to discuss Flynn’s behavior. Meanwhile, Flynn has supposedly been complaining that he no longer gets one on one face time with Trump since the inauguration.

But it is a real thing. Flynn’s son believed in the Pizzagate conspiracy theory to the point where his false information actually led to an incident similar to what happened at Comet Ping Pong. So what happened this week that has people fuming at Flynn?

The future of the US national security adviser, Michael Flynn, looked uncertain on Friday after reports that he had discussed sanctions with the Russian ambassador to Washington before taking office, contrary to his earlier adamant denials.

The reports, based on leaks from current and former officials, also point to contacts between the former general and Russian officials going back to before the 8 November election – an election that the US intelligence agencies believe Russia tried to influence in Donald Trump’s favour.

Both the Washington Post and the New York Times reported that Flynn talked to the Russian ambassador, Sergei Kisilyak, about forthcoming sanctions from the Obama administration in response to Russian electoral meddling. The allegations led to calls from Democrats for Flynn to be dismissed while some prominent Republicans were tepid in their support.

Yes so Flynn would go ahead with lifting the sanctions on Russia imposed after the Crimea invasion. Which are reportedly leading toward talks of Flynn’s dismissal:

The future of the US national security adviser, Michael Flynn, looked uncertain on Friday after reports that he had discussed sanctions with the Russian ambassador to Washington before taking office, contrary to his earlier adamant denials.

The reports, based on leaks from current and former officials, also point to contacts between the former general and Russian officials going back to before the 8 November election – an election that the US intelligence agencies believe Russia tried to influence in Donald Trump’s favour.

Both the Washington Post and the New York Times reported that Flynn talked to the Russian ambassador, Sergei Kisilyak, about forthcoming sanctions from the Obama administration in response to Russian electoral meddling. The allegations led to calls from Democrats for Flynn to be dismissed while some prominent Republicans were tepid in their support.

And not only might he be fired, how is Michael T. Flynn firing back? He’s hopping mad folks! And shit is going down! Oh yes it’s going down! Remember back before the election when the worst thing we had to worry about was whether or not Hillary Clinton may or may not have stored vital national security secrets on a private e-mail server? Well it turns out the people we trusted with our national security secrets are well, not being very secretive about them! And here’s how Flynn responded:

Flynn spoke with me for an hour last Friday. He talked about Trump’s management style, Bannon’s role and his model for how the NSC should work. His comments didn’t answer any of the big questions about Trump’s presidency, such as the merits of an entry ban on citizens of seven Muslim-majority countries. But Flynn presented a calmer and less combative image than when he mocked Hillary Clinton by chanting “Lock her up!” during the Republican National Convention.

Flynn started with an organization chart that’s modestly streamlined. He says he’ll have eight people reporting directly to him, compared with his predecessor Susan Rice’s 23. The most interesting detail is the small box on the top-right corner, marked “Stephen Bannon.” It’s a staff position, not in the chain of command. Next to it is a “Strategic Vision Task Force” that Flynn and Bannon will oversee along with White House Chief of Staff Reince Priebus and senior adviser Jared Kushner.

Flynn, who has been at Trump’s side far longer than Bannon, described the strategist as part of the “new team” that “got us across the finish line.” He denied news accounts of friction, noting the two meet “routinely.” Interestingly, he described the populist Bannon’s stance as “more left than right.”

Oh and he just admitted – he might have committed some… light… treason, but guess what? He has no reason to resign!

Michael Flynn has no plans to resign and no expectations that he will be fired, a senior administration official told CNN Sunday.
That's despite a turbulent 72 hours caused by the national security adviser's inability to deny that he spoke about sanctions against Russia with the Russian ambassador before President Donald Trump took office.
While Flynn may have no plans to leave the White House, many inside the Trump administration are concerned with the fact that the national security adviser could have misled senior members of the White House, including Vice President Mike Pence, who went on national television and denied that Flynn spoke about sanctions with Sergey Kislyak, Russian ambassador to Washington.

And by the way – he did resign this week, and what happened the day after his resignation? The House Oversight Committee – which is run by a republican – and I shit you not – will not investigate Flynn! Their incompetence and reckless regard for the law knows no boundaries! Yeah never mind that we have a traitor in our midst, let’s fire the messenger!

“It’s taking care of itself,” said Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R-Utah).

House Oversight Committee Chairman Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R-Utah) said Tuesday he will not pursue an investigation into what contacts Michael Flynn had with the Russian government before Dump took office, and whether Flynn then lied about his communications.

Rep. Devin Nunes (R-Calif.), chair of the House Intelligence Committee, said Monday that he will do an investigation ― but regarding the leaks of details about Flynn’s call, rather than his actual conduct. Nunes, who was part of the executive committee of Trump’s transition team, also put out a statement offering nothing but praise for Flynn after he announced he would step down from the administration.

“Michael Flynn served in the U.S. military for more than three decades. Washington, D.C. can be a rough town for honorable people, and Flynn ― who has always been a soldier, not a politician ― deserves America’s gratitude and respect for dedicating so much of his life to strengthening our national security,” he said in a statement. “I thank him for his many years of distinguished service.”

It’s taking care of itself – what does that mean? Do we live in a perpetual shit machine now?

[font size="8"]Donald Trump[/font]

So this happened:

Hey Trump, they’re not sending you off into the sunset, they’re telling you to go fuck yourself! I mean seriously is he Mr. Burns now?

FINAL UPDATE: President Donald Trump is on his way back to Washington, D.C., after spending the weekend at his Mar-a-Lago Club in Palm Beach.

Air Force One took off from Palm Beach International Airport about 5:30 p.m. Japan’s Prime Minister Shinzo Abe left earlier in the day after spending nearly two full days with Trump, including discussions Friday at the White House and an outing Saturday morning to Trump’s two Palm Beach County golf courses.

The prime minister and his wife, Akie Abe, stayed at Mar-a-Lago from Friday evening through Sunday morning. First lady Melania Trump and Akie Abe spent Saturday morning touring the Morikami Museum and Japanese Gardens in suburban Delray Beach.

So much better than Hillary’s e-mails, they tell us! You know I have a place that the republicans should be made aware of where I would like to shove those servers, and it’s not something they will feel very comfortably about after the act has been performed! I mean they’re just fucking with national security at this point. And I will go out on a limb to say this: THE REPUBLICANS DON’T GIVE A RAT’S ASS ABOUT NATIONAL SECURITY!!!! Because this happened:

When news broke that North Korea had launched an intermediate-range ballistic missile, President Trump was in the middle of a weekend spent golfing and relationship-building with Japanese Prime Minster Shinzo Abe.

According to a CNN report, Trump took a call relative to the Saturday event on a mobile phone while enjoying dinner with Abe amongst other Mar-a-Lago club-goers.

The move out of North Korea marked the nation's first international challenge since Donald Trump took office as the 45th American president. As one the first national security incidents of his presidency, it put Trump in the position to shape public opinion of how the commander in chief would tackle such global occurrences.

A visitor to President Trump's Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida posted a Facebook photo with a person he says is responsible for carrying the black bag that contains the nuclear launch codes for the president of the United States.

“This is Rick...He carries the ‘football’ The nuclear football (also known as the atomic football, the President's emergency satchel, the Presidential Emergency Satchel, the button, the black box, or just the football) is a briefcase, the contents of which are to be used by the President of the United States to authorize a nuclear attack while away from fixed command centers, such as the White House Situation Room,” the caption reads.

The two images, one of which shows the man carrying the briefcase, is tagged at "Donald Trump Palm Beach Home."

Oh lighten up people! I mean he’s Rick! He’s your friendly neighborhood Nuclear Football guy! So the GOP doesn’t care about national security. They might as well just blare it over a Wal*Mart intercom! “Attention shoppers, will the North Korean diplomat buying laundry detergent on aisle 5 please let the whole world know that we know he has 2.5 megatons of enriched uranium attached to his wrist!”. Oh and this again is one of the very things that again, republicans accused Obama of doing – identifying the guy who has the, um, nuclear launch codes!

Because the case must be near the president at all times, several aides from all military branches are authorized to carry it. They are photographed nearly every day trailing the president, perhaps most famously in Red Square in Moscow in May 1988 alongside President Reagan in a momentous visit to the Soviet Union.

Conservative pundits criticized Vice President Joe Biden in August when he publicly identified a military aide with the nuclear football during a campaign rally for Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton.

The Department of Defense is also planning to lease space in Trump Tower, the 68-story New York building where the president has his home and business headquarters. A floor with 13,000 to 15,000 square feet of space at the building rents for about $1.5 million a year.

The reason the military needs the space? They need room for military aides to handle the nuclear football.

So republicans would throw a proverbial shit fit if Biden or Obama had even the slightest hint that they spotted the guy carrying a 2 megaton nuclear warhead attached to his wrist. But republicans who are big time Trump supporters can take selfies with him! Because… internet!

A member of Donald Trump’s private Florida club has posted an image of himself posing with a man he claimed carries the president’s nuclear football.

Reports from Mr Trump’s meeting with Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe over the weekend, said the two leaders had been briefed about a missile launch in North Korea, while they were eating. CNN said that the two leaders began to discuss how to respond in full public view, and images of the two men and their staffs were snapped by club members.

Now, it has emerged that one of the members, Richard DeAgazio, posted an image with a member of Mr Trump’s entourage, he claimed was responsible for carrying the nuclear football - the briefcase that never leaves the president’s side and which allows him to authorise a nuclear strike. The Independent has blanked out the person's face and left out his name.

[font size="8"]Donald Trump[/font]

I love this so much:

As I said in the intro – we’re going after department stores now. Really? So you know by now last week Trump was feuding with Nordstrom after they dropped Ivanka Trump’s line. Can we throw that Tweet up there?


Norm Eisen, co-founder of Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington, has offered to help Nordstrom and other companies sue President Donald Trump for improperly using his executive position to hurt their businesses.

In a tweet on Wednesday, Trump blasted Nordstrom for dropping his daughter Ivanka’s line of products.

“My daughter Ivanka has been treated so unfairly by @Nordstrom,” Trump tweeted using the official POTUS account. “She is a great person — always pushing me to do the right thing! Terrible!”

Eisen immediately called the president’s tweet “outrageous.”

“Nordstrom, others injured should consider suing, incl. under CA Unfair Comp Law, forbidding ‘any unfair biz act,'” Eisen wrote on Twitter. “I will help!”

But there’s more and the more you dig into this story the weirder it gets:

White House press secretary Sean Spicer said Wednesday that Nordstrom's decision to stop carrying Ivanka Trump's clothing and accessories line is an attack on the president's policies and his daughter.

Spicer told reporters during his daily press briefing that the decision -- which Nordstrom said was a result of poor sales, not politics -- was because of the clothing company's displeasure with President Donald Trump's executive orders and his policies.

"I think this is less about his family's business and an attack on his daughter," Spicer said. "He ran for president. He won. He's leading this country. I think for people to take out their concern about his actions or his executive orders on members of his family, he has every right to stand up for his family and applaud their business activities, their success."

Earlier on Wednesday, Trump attacked Nordstrom on Twitter, saying that the brand treated his daughter "so unfairly."

Read more: http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/ivanka-trump-nordstrom-line

It’s a direct attack on the president! Oh no! The horror! And of course like everything Trump is doing, this is having a reverse effect:

Nordstrom's stock went up by more than 4 percent Wednesday after President Trump fired off a tweet criticizing it for discontinuing Ivanka Trump's brands of clothing and other merchandise.

Nordstrom’s stock dipped -0.5 percent immediately after Trump’s morning tweet calling it “terrible” for treating his daughter, Ivanka, “so unfairly.”

However, the stock fully recovered within four minutes, and closed out the day up 4.1 percent, MarketWatch reported.

Read more: http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/318597-nordstrom-stock-gains-over-4-for-the-day-after-trump-tweet

[font size="8"]The Yemen Raid[/font]

You know the news changes on an almost hourly basis anymore. And we here at the Top 10 home office can barely take it all in. And since we have to limit it to 10, we often times have hold overs from previous editions. This is one of those. So Donald Trump got his first chance to play armchair commando this week. The Armchair Commandos, by the way, I saw them at the Troubadour last week – not that great, but they can’t all be winners! So here’s what happened:


WASHINGTON — One American commando was killed and three others were wounded in a fierce firefight early Sunday with Qaeda militants in central Yemen, the military said on Sunday. It was the first counterterrorism operation authorized by President Trump since he took office, and the commando was the first United States service member to die in the yearslong shadow war against Al Qaeda’s Yemen affiliate.

Members of the Navy’s SEAL Team 6 carried out the surprise dawn attack, and the military said that about 14 Qaeda fighters were killed during a nearly hourlong battle. A Qaeda leader — a brother-in-law of Anwar al-Awlaki, the American-born cleric and top Qaeda leader in Yemen, who died in a drone strike in 2011 — was believed to have been killed.

After initially denying that there were any civilian casualties, American officials said they were assessing reports that women and children had died in the attack.

That’s a good question – where was Jack Bauer in all of this? This is a 24 scenario in real life! Yeah so we didn’t get the guy we were going after but instead killed women and children! Welcome to Donald Trump’s America – where international incompetence knows no boundaries! And yes they were waiting for our Navy Seals! This is a million times worse than Benghazi! Yemenghazi?

Trump Yemen raid President Donald Trump arriving at Dover Air Force Base on Marine One on Wednesday to greet the remains of a US military commando killed during a raid on the Qaeda militant group in southern Yemen on Sunday. REUTERS/Carlos Barria

The SEAL Team 6 raid in Yemen that resulted in the death of Chief Special Warfare Operator William "Ryan" Owens was declared a success by President Donald Trump, who praised Owens and his fellow commandos, three of whom were wounded, for "killing 14 members" and "capturing important intelligence that will assist the US in preventing terrorism."

But as more details of the weekend covert counterterrorism operation emerge, it's evident that the mission didn't go according to plan.

And I give this meme props for the correct usage of the term “literally”. And I love how Trump declared it a “success” when it was a complete and utter failure. But then again we live in a world where “alternative facts” are a thing. And how did this whole thing come about? Well, Trump’s staff is channeling their inner Bart Simpson by saying “Obama didn’t do it!”

Military officials got Donald Trump to agree to the botched Yemen raid by suggesting Barack Obama would never have had the courage to do it, it has been reported.

The raid, which had been planned for two months before Mr Trump’s arrival in the Oval Office, killed 30 civilians and one US Navy SEAL but failed to kill its alleged target, al Qaeda leader Qassim al Rimi ...

Defence Secretary, General James "Mad Dog" Mattis, and the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Joseph Dunford, reportedly convinced Mr Trump to go ahead with the raid by suggesting Mr Obama would never have been so bold as to actually go through with it ...


I like that one! But there’s more. You know that the guy we were supposed to go after is still alive, and not only that he is gloating about it?

The Navy SEAL raid in Yemen last week had a secret objective — the head of al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula, who survived and is now taunting President Donald Trump in an audio message.

Military and intelligence officials told NBC News the goal of the massive operation was to capture or kill Qassim al-Rimi, considered the third most dangerous terrorist in the world and a master recruiter.

But while one SEAL, 14 al Qaeda fighters and some civilians, including an 8-year-old girl, were killed during a firefight, al-Rimi is still alive and in Yemen, multiple military officials said.

On Sunday, al-Rimi — who landed on the United States' most-wanted terrorist list after taking over al Qaeda's Yemen affiliate in 2015 — released an audio recording that military sources said is authentic. .

[font size="8"]Donald Trump[/font]

So we got to talk about what I like to call the “flip flopping president”. I mean seriously this guy flip flops more than a beach goer that loses their sandals.

'Although there is plenty of anxiety in Washington about the shaky early performance of the Trump administration, don’t count Senator Mitch McConnell among the hand wringers.

Mr. McConnell, a Kentucky Republican and the majority leader, says he and his Senate Republican colleagues are quite satisfied with the Trump team so far. In fact, he said, they are reassured by signs that President Trump is going to hew to a conservative agenda after early fears that the president — a relatively unknown quantity to most elected Republicans — might not really be one of them.

“The country doesn’t need saving,” Mr. McConnell said when asked during an interview in his Capitol office if there was any cause for a senior-level congressional intervention given early chaos in the evolving West Wing.

“I think there is a high level of satisfaction with the new administration,” he said, dismissing concerns about dissonant eruptions from the new president and some of his top staff members. “Our members are not obsessed with the daily tweets, but are looking at the results.”'>>>


And what would those values be I wonder?

Oh snap! Indeed! So is Mitch McConnell using the “move along nothing to see here” card? Well you know who else is using that card as well? If you guessed Donald Trump you are correct! You get points! I would start with:

President-elect Donald Trump on Friday said he wouldn’t commit to backing the “One China” policy, a stance Beijing sees as non-negotiable.

“Everything is under negotiation including One China,” Trump told the Wall Street Journal when asked about the policy.

China has long considered Taiwan a breakaway province that belongs to China. The U.S. adopted the ‘One China’ policy and stopped recognizing Taiwan’s government in 1979, when the U.S. and China renewed diplomatic relations.


BEIJING/WASHINGTON U.S. President Donald Trump changed tack and agreed to honor the "one China" policy during a phone call with China's leader Xi Jinping, a major diplomatic boost for Beijing which brooks no criticism of its claim to self-ruled Taiwan.

Trump angered Beijing in December by talking to the president of Taiwan and saying the United States did not have to stick to the policy, under which Washington acknowledges the Chinese position that there is only one China and Taiwan is part of it.

A White House statement said Trump and Chinese President Xi had a lengthy phone conversation on Thursday night, Washington time.

And there’s more! Previously:

The Donald Trump transition team has acknowledged that its incoming national security adviser has been in contact with Russia's ambassador but denies reports they were plotting over recently imposed sanctions on Moscow.

A transition team official acknowledged a call on Dec. 29, the day President Obama hit Russia for election-related hacking, but said the conversation was about “logistics” for a call between Russian President Vladimir Putin and Trump, who on Friday is sworn-in as president.


National security adviser Michael Flynn privately discussed U.S. sanctions against Russia with that country’s ambassador to the United States during the month before President Trump took office, contrary to public assertions by Trump officials, current and former U.S. officials said.

Flynn’s communications with Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak were interpreted by some senior U.S. officials as an inappropriate and potentially illegal signal to the Kremlin that it could expect a reprieve from sanctions that were being imposed by the Obama administration in late December to punish Russia for its alleged interference in the 2016 election.

[font size="8"]Stephen Miller[/font]

So one guy in the Trump administration who we’ve yet to cover on this show is Donald Trump’s senior advisor and part time Hannibal Lecter stand in Stephen Miller, who occasionally reminds Donald that he forgot to put the lotion in the basket, is absolutely completely deranged. In fact he came from a town close to where I live – Santa Monica, where the residents there are wondering exactly how they could have produced a guy this batshit insane:

Residents of Santa Monica, Calif. are now openly baffled by how their left-leaning beachfront city managed to produce Miller — a White House senior advisor who helped craft President Trump’s travel bans and spent his Sunday spreading unverified voter fraud accusations on political TV shows.

“Please tell me #StephenMiller's creepy power trip is only one-way. Santa Monica doesn't exactly need him back here,” local singer-songwriter Julie Silver tweeted Sunday after Miller made his rounds on morning shows.

Other Twitter users claimed to know Miller back in his high school days — and knew that he’d turn out to be trouble.

So why is this creep in the news this week? Well you know the GOP’s favorite boogeyman is voter fraud, and they go about chasing voter fraud in the same way Wiley Coyote chases the road runner. They know they are not going to catch anybody. They use lots of crazy tricks and contraptions to try to catch them in the act of committing voter fraud. So Donald Trump is egging on the myth that the states of Massachusetts and California (gee, why them? ) committed voter fraud and hired illegal voters and bussed them in from other states. Which is completely absurd.

They said it again on Sunday: The White House accused thousands of Massachusetts residents of busing into New Hampshire to illegally vote on Election Day. Trump said it Thursday to a group of US senators in a private meeting, and White House Senior Policy Adviser Stephen Miller reiterated that accusation during media interviews over the weekend.

This fraud, Trump and his staff have argued, is why he lost New Hampshire by around 3,000 votes, and US Senator Kelly Ayotte, a Republican, lost her reelection by an even slimmer margin.

But he isn’t backing down, he’s doubling down. Oh yes ladies and gentlemen, Donald Trump really is Wiley Coyote when it comes to voter fraud!

White House adviser Stephen Miller doubled down on the Trump administration's groundless claims of voter fraud in New Hampshire — and across the nation — during in an interview on ABC's This Week on Sunday.

Earlier this week President Trump claimed, with no evidence, that voters from Massachusetts were bused to New Hampshire to vote illegally.

A member of the Federal Election Commission called it an "extraordinarily serious and specific charge" and asked Trump to "immediately share his evidence with the public."

On This Week, host George Stephanopoulos asked Miller, a senior White House policy adviser, to provide that evidence. In fact, he asked three times.

And how did Stephen Miller justify this? Why he just reiterated Trump’s insane theory without any knowledge of the subject! I mean seriously we have the most insane and incompetent administration America ever has or will see. Because this happened:

WASHINGTON -- Presidential adviser Stephen Miller peddled discredited theories about voter fraud during a round of TV appearances Sunday that won praise from his boss but brought no new evidence to light.

Miller mischaracterized research about wrongly registered voters and spread a debunked claim that busloads of Democrats came into New Hampshire and voted improperly in the November election. His Sunday morning performance on news shows earned him a “Good job!” on Twitter from President Donald Trump, who alleged days earlier that he lost New Hampshire in November only because “thousands” of people came by bus to vote against him.

A look at a few of the senior policy adviser’s statements on ABC’s “This Week.”

MILLER: “I can tell you that this issue of busing voters in to New Hampshire is widely known by anyone who’s worked in New Hampshire politics. It’s very real, it’s very serious. This morning on this show is not the venue for me lay out all the evidence.”

By the way I think we have video of what Trump’s investigation is going to look like. Can we show that?

[font size="8"]Alex Jones[/font]

So it’s really sad that John Oliver is the only one in the media who can point out how dangerous the Trump – Infowars connection is. But can we throw up a screen shot of John Oliver’s report on Alex Jones?

That is an inhuman shade of red on his face. I mean it looks like he’s about to blow a 1950’s cartoon style gasket. You know what? Let’s go to the tape on this one and then we’ll discuss.

During a live broadcast of The Alex Jones Show on Feb. 5, Alex Jones confessed that he is “ready to die for Trump.”

The radio host is known for his conspiracy theories — including that the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11 were an inside job and the government distributes chemicals to increase homosexuality for population control — and used his latest segment to declare his infinite devotion to President Trump and America. Jones effused:

Trump is so fire-breathing, so energetic, so cunning, so real, and he’s having results so amazing that it just makes me endeared to Trump – I’m ready to die for Trump, at this point. And I’m already ready to die for America, it’s the same feeling I have for America, because he is America, you’re America.

Jones said his reverence for Trump compares to the way he feels about the men and women who serve in the military and “lose arms or legs,” especially “compared to the average person who’s lazy and doesn’t care.”

Well Alex Jones hasn’t remained silent since his boy got in the White House. In fact we’ve got a few of his greatest hits for you – just in the last week.

Last week, far-right radio host Alex Jones lashed out at the Ninth Circuit Court for upholding a lower court’s decision that deemed President Trump’s executive orders on immigration and refugee resettlement to be unconstitutional.

Jones claimed that there is a grand conspiracy of governmental and financial institutions waging “economic terrorism” against the U.S. in order to hurt Trump. Strangely, Jones named Goldman Sachs and JP Morgan as among the anti-Trump actors, despite the fact that Trump has built close ties with the two Wall Street firms.

Which he followed up with:

ALEX JONES (HOST): Make no mistake. What you’ve seen is the ongoing countercoup. And it’s not a good sign because there was a coup, we had a countercoup. It’s a countercoup to the countercoup. And it shows that Trump is listening more and more to Paul Ryan and Reince Priebus and others saying, “Look, we know there’s no Russian ties to you, but if anybody else has ties prove it to people, get rid of them.” And so, all the news is saying today, “This proves it’s a Russian operation, this is going to bring Trump down, this proves the investigation is just going to get started now.” And John McCain’s running around foaming at the mouth, and the Republican leaders are on Fox News with their chest out going, “Yeah, we’ll get to the bottom of this, we’ll keep Trump on a short leash. We know how to keep you safe from them durn Ruskies.”

Just like we knew it would go. So, I know Trump’s super smart, so maybe Flynn did some other things, because that’s really what it is. I shouldn’t say maybe Flynn did other things, Flynn’s not bad and Flynn’s a super patriot and led, inside the government, the countercoup against the globalists who were about to end free speech, totally take over, just -- in the name of net neutrality start total censorship. Again, everything’s upside-down, real hardcore evil was about to commence. They admitted that, that was their plan if Hillary got in. But it was so obvious, so over the top, that finally people in our government and the citizens and across the world are awakening saying, “No, we don’t want this.”

Trump is super smart? Oh what planet are you living on? But this might be one of the most egregious examples of hate speech on his show. Uh, Alex? You are aware that the people who are the biggest takers of your money are the people who you helped put in the White House, right? It’s not some insane conspiracy involving charities owned by people on the left. It’s Trump, it’s Mnuchin, it’s DeVos, it’s Tillerson, it’s all those fuckers!

InfoWars conspiracy theorist Alex Jones was not pleased with singer Jennifer Lopez’s Grammy speech on Sunday night. Lopez got political, telling the crowd, “At this particular point in history, our voices are needed more than ever.”

She then quoted author Toni Morrison and said, “This is precisely the time when artists go to work. There is no time for despair, no place for self pity, no need for silence, and no room for fear. We do language. That is how civilizations heal.”

Jones responded in a segment calling Lopez a “tart,” before noting how “all the leftists from big foundations … hoard the money for themselves, like you know, the Clintons and Oprah, and all the rest of it.”

He continued, “And she’s up there, ‘Oh and we just gotta do something, it’s we’re so oppressed, it’s all so horrible, what will’ — Yes, let’s critique this — ‘it’s so terrible … and Trump wants to build factories for poor people.'”

[font size="8"]Robert Kraft[/font]

Yeah yeah the Patriots are the Super Bowl Champions. Yeah fuck Roger Gooddell. Yeah Tom Brady is the greatest of all time. Blah blah blah. But we have to talk about a rather curious development with the champions. Sure, we can talk about Tom Brady famously not going to the White House 2 years ago to visit with Obama:

When the New England Patriots took a visit to the White House on April 23 to celebrate the team's Super Bowl win, there was one notable absence: Tom Brady.

According to the Patriots, Brady skipped out on the White House visit because he had a previously planned "family commitment."

As it turns out though, Brady wasn't with his family when the Patriots went to Washington DC on the morning of April 23. According to ESPN.com, the Patriots quarterback was actually at Gillette Stadium getting some stretching in while the rest of the team was visiting with Obama.

And then this week not one, not two, not 3 but a whopping 6 Patriots have said that they’ll skip out on visiting Trump’s White House. I may actually have some respect for them It started with Dont’a Hightower:

New England Patriots linebacker Dont'a Hightower is the latest member of the Super Bowl 51 champions to announce he won't go to the White House when President Donald Trump honors the team.

During an appearance on SportsCenter Wednesday, Hightower said he wouldn't go to the White House because he had already "been there, done that," according to ESPN.com's Mike Reiss.

And from there 5 more Patriots joined Hightower. So much that now it’s forced the owner and CEO of the team, Robert Kraft, to address the issue. So this happened:

Six of Tom Brady’s teammates have now vowed to skip the New England Patriots’ traditional post-Super Bowl trip to President Trump’s White House, whenever that may be. But the legendary quarterback — who calls Trump a friend — isn’t talking about whether he will join them.

And, really, can you blame Brady?

Every Patriots player who has said he will skip the trip has drawn attention to himself. That’s the last thing Brady wants after dodging questions about his relationship with the president ever since that “Make America Great Again” cap was spotted in his locker 17 months ago.

And then the response from Kraft himself came out today. And well… what the fuck? I mean seriously we know he’s a bonafied Trump supporter, as is Brady and Belicheck. Bill Maher had a great new rule about it before the Super Bowl:

And here’s his statement:

Devin McCourty, Martellus Bennett, Chris Long and a few others have come out and said they won’t be joining the team in Washington D.C. when they visit the White House, the same way Tom Brady didn’t two years ago.

Patriots owner Robert Kraft is obviously aware of all this, but he has no problems with the decisions his players are making.
"Well, you know what's interesting, this is our, I'm happy to say, fifth Super Bowl in the last 16 years," Kraft said on the Today Show Monday. "And every time we've had the privilege of going to the White House, a dozen of our players don't go. This is the first time it's gotten any media attention.

“You know, some of the players have the privilege of going in college because they're on national championship teams, others have family commitments. But this is America. We're all free to do whatever's best for us. We're just privileged to be in a position to be going."

And Brady himself isn’t helping his own justification of not going to visit Obama 2 years ago:

Tom Brady calls visiting the White House a “great experience,” but he is encouraging his fellow New England Patriots to make “their own choice” about a meet-and-greet with President Trump.

“Everybody has their own choice,” Brady told “PFT Live” on Tuesday, when asked about advice he would give to teammates who were undecided about joining the trip to the White House.

“Putting politics aside, it never was a political thing,” the quarterback and five-time Super Bowl champion said of his multiple trips to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. “At least, it never was to me. It was something that was a privilege to do. It meant you won a championship and you got to experience something cool with your team, with your teammates.”

Last week, defensive lineman Alan Branch became the sixth Patriot to announce he’ll be skipping the traditional visit to Trump’s White House. While Branch didn’t specifically cite Trump in his decision not to attend, other teammates have said their choice to back out of the trip was a form of protest against the commander in chief.

Read more: http://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/319430-brady-patriots-must-make-their-own-choice-on-white-house-visit

[font size="8"]New York Knicks[/font]

Ah, I love some Harlem Globetrotters! You know what folks? We’re taking a break next week. I’m kind of burnt out talking about Trump 24/7, so with that in mind let’s talk about something that doesn’t have anything to do with politics and instead go to the sports world. We already discussed football, now let’s talk about basketball. I love my Lakers don’t get me wrong and I’ve repeatedly expressed that (although this season… ). But the worst franchise in basketball – the New York Knicks under Phil Jackson have been, the words “cluster” and “fuck” come to mind. So it turns out that the New York Knicks are about as out of control and turbulent as the Donald Trump administration so far. So what happened last week?

During the first quarter of Wednesday night’s game between the New York Knicks and Los Angeles Clippers, former Knicks enforcer Charles Oakley became enraged during a physical altercation with Madison Square Garden security in the vicinity of Knicks owner James Dolan.

Oakley was immediately escorted away from his seat, ejected from the arena and handcuffed and arrested.

Knicks president Phil Jackson reportedly attempted to calm Oakley.

The Knicks issued a statement, citing Oakley as a “great Knick” but calling his behavior at the game “completely abusive”.

So yeah what the fuck did I just watch? What set Charles Oakley off? I mean it’s a clusterfuck already when you’re the last place team in basketball, and now to make things even worse, you ban a former member of your club for life. So what did Carmelo Anthony have to say about the turmoil surrounding his organization?

The Knicks have lost four in a row, all at Madison Square Garden, including to the lowly Lakers, the short-handed Clippers, and Friday night Denver owned them thanks to the play of Nikola Jokic.

And that wasn’t even the worst part of their week. Phil Jackson’s efforts to frustrate Carmelo Anthony via Twitter backfired and made the president of the Knicks look foolish, but Jackson says he was just misunderstood. The owner had beloved Knicks legend Charles Oakley thrown out of MSG and arrested, then doubled-down on saying their feud was all Oakley’s fault because the former player has anger — and maybe drinking — problems. So they have banned Oakley from the Garden.

All of that has made the Knicks a place free agents will avoid if they can this summer (money always plays a role).

And then it gets weirder from there. So what did the Knicks owner James Dolan say after Oakley was ejected and arrested? Why guess what? He tried to blame the whole damn thing on Oakley!

The last thing we need more of is another New Yorker with a lot of power, inherited wealth, thin skin, and an inability to let issues go even when he is clearly in the wrong. But here we are.

In the wake of Charles Oakley being thrown out of Madison Square Garden and arrested Wednesday night, the Knicks can’t win the public relations battle because it’s a beloved former player vs. James Dolan, an owner seen as running a premiere franchise into the ground. You can be sure Friday night at the Garden there will be loud “Charles Oakley” chants from the fans. The smart move for the Knicks would be to make this go away as quickly as possible, don’t keep digging the hole deeper. You can be sure that’s what people at the NBA league offices have been telling Dolan to do for a full day. Instead, the Knicks sent out a press release late Friday with 16 witness accounts backing their side of the story (that Oakley was abusive) and promising video later.

I like that one!

And yes when you’re in a hole, the first thing to do is to stop digging! And you know what happened next? You know what former Knicks legend they got to replace Oakley courtside? Latrell Sprewell! Yes, that Latrell Sprewell! Who is famous for feuding with owner James Dolan! The New York Knicks are a classic example of an organization that hates their own alumni.

Latrell Sprewell attended the New York Knicks' 94-90 win over the San Antonio Spurs as a guest of the organization Sunday, sitting next to owner James Dolan four days after fan favorite Charles Oakley was physically removed from the stands at Madison Square Garden and arrested.

Sprewell and Dolan had long been at odds. Sprewell, who helped lead the Knicks to the Finals in 1999, screamed obscenities at Dolan in his first game back at the arena in 2003, following a trade from the Knicks to the Minnesota Timberwolves, leading to their icy relationship. He was fined $25,00 for the incident.

[font size="8"]Stupidest State Round 4: Batshit Conference: Kentucky Vs. Texas[/font]

16 states will enter, and only one state will be crowned the new Top 10 Conservative Idiots Stupidest State! If you need a reminder of the conferences, there’s the Batshit Conference, the Fiscal Irresponsibility Conference, the Gun Nut Conference, and the Family Values Conference. Last week it was an old west style duel to the death as the racists and white supremacists in Montana quick drew against the Homeland Security rejects in Arizona to advance to the next round. This time we’re going to the overall favorite conference – the Batshit Conference! This the conference that contains such favorite states as Texas, Kentucky, Florida, Maine, West Virginia, Tennessee, Iowa, Louisiana and Nebraska. The states in the Batshit Conference each have a distinct personality in that their elected representatives as just as batshit crazy as the people who inhabit these states. These are the states where you can get a DUI while filming an anti-DUI video, while your congressional representatives use actual floor time in the state house to make the claim Obama was a gay prostitute in his past life and his wife is a paid actress. Yes that actually did happen. So in this round, we get heavyweight juggernauts Kentucky – who’s made it to the Final Four 3 years in a row against perennial favorite Texas. Let’s get out our brackets shall we?

[font size="6"]Round 4: Batshit Conference: #3 – Kentucky vs #4 - Texas[/font]

[font size="4"]Kentucky[/font]

Kentucky. The Bluegrass State. It’s the home of the Kentucky Derby which *allegedly* violates animal abuse laws in regards to the amount of care the horses get. It’s also the home of one of the best basketball programs in the country – the UK Wildcats. It’s also home to the Louisville Cardinals, who were at the center of one of my favorite sports scandals of all time. Just like last week we covered the fact that Montana’s racists and white supremacists feel “emboldened” by Trump’s victory . Well, so do Kentucky’s.

"A white nationalist group plans to instruct participants on proper marching, how to create propaganda and on being “a voice for our people” at a conference in April at Jenny Wiley State Park in Floyd County.

The Traditionalist Worker Party, which claims to “take a stand for white working families,” will gather in the “98.35 percent European” community on April 28 and 29, according to its Facebook post, which has been shared more than 500 times. The post said the event would be held in Pike County but announced that the seminars, speeches and a dinner will be at nearby Jenny Wiley State Resort Park, which is in Floyd County.

Floyd County Judge-Executive Ben Hale said the group has a Constitutional right to meet, but the vast majority of county residents would not condone its views.

“That’s just not the way our county thinks,” Hale said Wednesday. “I feel like we’ve got honest, God-fearing people.”

Read more here: http://www.kentucky.com/news/state/article131474154.html#storylink=cpy"

First where are the Blues Brothers when you need them?

And second – why? I mean do today’s modern racist families really need white representation? Who exactly are they catering to? I mean your racist uncle already has both houses of Congress and SCOTUS, what more do they need? I mean just look at the diversity here!


I count… white male, white male, white male, white male, white male, white male, white male, white male, white male, white male, and um… white male. Females? No. Black males? No. Black females? No. Latino males? No. Latino females? No. Asian males? No. Asian females? No. Just white men, and um, white men. That’s enough. Do we really need more? I mean these people think of diversity the same way Ron Burgundy does:

Kentucky is also the home of their new governor, Tea Party darling Matt Bevin. He’s definitely in the running for one of the worst governors in the country. Yes, you know we have these things called laws that prevent conservatives from doing stupid shit like this. And after last week where Trump called for the overturning of the Johnson Amendment, during the campaign, Bevin did this:

Gov. Matt Bevin told a group of ministers assembled at the governor’s mansion last week to ignore a federal law that forbids tax-exempt churches from advocating for the election or defeat of political candidates.

A crowd of about 130 church leaders from across the state attended the invite-only and unpublicized “Pastor Appreciation Forum” held at the governor’s residence.

An attendee named Ken Prevett, an investment consultant from Harrodsburg, originally posted the video to his Facebook page, which shows Bevin encouraging a group of pastors to disregard the Johnson Amendment, a section of the federal tax code passed in 1954.

A Facebook group called Kentuckians Against Matt Bevin has been circulating the video, which shows Bevin encouraging pastors to disregard the Johnson Amendment, a change to federal tax code passed in 1954.

And just like other governors we’ve named so far, what good is being a GOP governor without an ethics investigation? Because who needs things like laws and ethics? Pfft. If you’re a republican governor and you’re *NOT* under investigation for ethics violations, you’re doing it wrong!

FRANKFORT — The chairman of a legislative committee investigating Republican Gov. Matt Bevin has resigned in protest because he said the outgoing Democratic speaker of the House has refused to let him subpoena the governor’s chief accuser.

Speaker Greg Stumbo created the committee in October to investigate claims by Democratic state Rep. Russ Meyer that Bevin canceled a transportation project in his district to punish him for refusing to switch parties. But Meyer did not respond to multiple requests to testify under oath before the committee.

Committee Chairman Jim Wayne said Thursday that Stumbo denied his request to issue Meyer a subpoena.

“The speaker does not want any Democratic House member to be subpoenaed by the committee,” said Wayne, a Democrat from Louisville. “It appears the Speaker’s granting of power to subpoena witnesses was conditional, making our efforts to arrive at the truth regarding charges against the governor impossible.”

Read more: http://www.state-journal.com/2016/12/08/chairman-of-committee-investigating-gov-matt-bevin-resigns/

Yes! The investigation into the scandal was so corrupt that the guy headlining that guy leading the investigation resigned! So who backed this guy? Bevin ran on a staunch anti-Obamacare platform and that easily allowed him to win even though he was trailing just before the election. So who voted for him?


The 66 percent of Owsley County that gets health coverage through Medicaid now must reconcile itself with the 70 percent that voted for Republican Governor-elect Matt Bevin, who pledged to cut the state's Medicaid program and close the state-run Kynect health insurance exchange....

"To be honest with you, a lot of folks in Owsley County went to the polls and voted against gay marriage and abortion, and as a result, I'm afraid they voted away their health insurance," Turner said. "Which was their right to do, I guess. But it's sad. Many people here signed up with Kynect, and it's helped them, it's been an absolute blessing."

The community's largest-circulation newspaper, the Three Forks Tradition in Beattyville, did not say much about Kynect ahead of the election. Instead, its editorials roasted Obama and Hillary Clinton, gay marriage, Islam, "liberal race peddlers," "liberal media," black criminals and "the radical Black Lives Matter movement."

So the unhealthiest racist people in the entire world voted against free health care! Yes this is how we get completely unethical governors like Bevin and Senators like Mitch McConnell. Kentucky had its’ own version of Covered California, called Kynect. But here’s why Kentucky is part of the Batshit Conference – just like Trump, Bevin has been busy bashing Kentucky’s judicial system:

On Trump's comments about groping women:

“I found it offensive as everybody else did. I’ve not met one person who didn’t find it offensive...Was it inappropriate? Of course. It was foul. It was vulgar. And it shouldn’t have any place in the public discourse. But, that said, sadly it does."

On those who have harshly criticized Trump for his comments:

"The very same hypocrites that are supposedly outraged and offended by this are the very same people that I guarantee you were first in line to go watch 'Fifty Shades of Grey' to see if it was trashy as the book they’ve read. And they probably listened to rap music on their way home to go play Grand Theft Auto with their kids and be encouraged to take other equally vulgar actions and language. It’s the hypocrisy of it that I’m offended by."

Read more: http://www.courier-journal.com/story/news/politics/ky-governor/2016/11/02/bevin-says-women-vote-trump-bashes-judge/93157926/

[font size="4"]Texas[/font]

Next in our Stupidest State contest is none other than the Lone Star State – Texas! Texas is the biggest state in the union. Which means there’s a lot of crazy we could cover. Texas is the home of Crawford, the residence of former president George W. Bush, and is also the home of the country’s largest airport – Dallas Ft. Worth, and is also the home of the country’s most scandal ridden university not named Penn State. I give you Baylor.

The former president of Baylor University went over the heads of other administrators in 2011 to help a troubled football player who would go on to commit sexual assault stay on the team, according to a report by The Wall Street Journal.

Defensive end Tevin Elliott was suspended for academic misconduct at the time but was reinstated after then-university president Ken Starr intervened on his behalf, the newspaper reported, citing two people familiar with the matter.

"Keep riding that white horse," head football coach Art Briles wrote in an email thanking Starr, those sources said.

Elliott was arrested for sexual assault the following year. At his trial, four women testified that he sexually assaulted them. Three of those incidents took place after his reinstatement in August 2011, according to The Journal.

Read more: http://www.dallasnews.com/news/higher-education/2016/12/22/rape-conviction-baylor-football-player-reportedly-escaped-suspension-help-university-president

Yes holy shit! That’s just one lawsuit! There’s way more to this story. In fact Baylor may be the one university that would hold the record for the most lawsuits against it currently! Baylor is also the home of Ken Starr. Yes, that same Kenneth Starr who investigated Bill Clinton for an alleged rape that never happened! So why are the students and alumni of Baylor fuming?

President and chancellor Ken Starr - not football coach Art Briles - will be Baylor's fall guy, sources tell HornsDigest.com.

Multiple sources connected to Baylor told HornsDigest.com football coach Art Briles has a better chance of keeping his job after the school's rape scandal than BU president and chancellor Ken Starr.

The sources said Starr will probably be reassigned to a position in BU's law school as a result of the failed leadership displayed after multiple rape claims made by female Baylor students against five BU football players all but went ignored. Two Baylor football players - Tevin Elliott and Sam Ukwuachu - were convicted of rape.

You know let’s check the bullshit meter on this one:

Oh it’s going crazy ladies and gentlemen! Yes so Kenneth Starr – the guy responsible for the media circus that was Bill Clinton’s impeachment trial is himself about to get impeached for the very thing he accused Bill Clinton of! Hypocrisy, thy name is Kenneth Starr! But Baylor isn’t the only scandal ridden Texas University out there – there’s also Rice University which boasts a strong population of Neo Nazis and Trump supporters who aren’t afraid of showing their support for the orange gasbag!

A bright swastika chalked below a scrawled “TRUMP” vandalized Rice University’s founder’s statue this weekend.

The chalk graffiti was found this weekend on the William Marsh Rice statue in the heart of the academic quad. University officials were quick to condemn the vandalism, the third act Rice has experienced in the last month.

“I have had it with this behavior,” undergraduate dean John Hutchinson said in a Facebook post Saturday night. “The use of the swastika clearly reveals that whoever did this is either ignorant of the history of true evil associated with this emblem of hate or is genuinely motivated by blind hatred."

University President David Leebron echoed Hutchinson’s statement. “We won’t tolerate such behavior, and it will be punished.”

Read more: http://www.chron.com/local/education/campus-chronicles/article/Vandals-strike-Rice-University-third-time-in-a-10909625.php

Texas is also the home of the Texas School Board, and one candidate in particular who is crazier than all of them put together – Mary Lou Bruner. We previously covered Bruner in Idiots #19 where she has said some ridiculously batshit crazy stuff like:

AUSTIN, TX -- Another Texas political figure is making national headlines, but not necessarily for all the right reasons.
Mary Lou Bruner is poised to be the next member of the Texas State Board of Education, having fallen just short of the 50 percent needed to secure the seat this past Tuesday.
Bruner will compete with chiropractor Keven Ellis, who got 31 percent of the vote, in a May runoff. Bruner, the GOP candidate, is expected to win over over Democratic opponent in the general election, as the Houston Chronicle reported.
That prospect has raised quite a few eyebrows, in Austin and beyond. The 68-year-old retired teacher from Smith County has distinguished herself with some, let’s say interesting, views and theories on everything from climate change to President Obama.

Yes Obama is a gay prostitute! Or she also made claims like the assassination of JFK was a plot by the democrats to avoid elections, or that climate change has nothing to do with the climate. But next up we have Corpus Christi, Texas where mayor Joe Gazin might be one of the craziest and most corrupt mayors in the country:

CORPUS CHRISTI — Joe Gazin, the veteran KIII-TV anchorman, threw Mayor Dan McQueen a simple pitch during a chat at a police foundation breakfast last month: Come on his newscast and explain what the heck was going on.

Just weeks into his tenure, controversies had enveloped McQueen like a Gulf Coast fog. There were charges of nepotism, questions about his credentials and plenty of cringing about his not-so-truthful Facebook tirades. But here was Gazin, dressed in his blue suit and red tie, offering McQueen a chance to tell voters his side of the story.

The newsman earned a maybe after some cajoling, but he wasn’t betting that McQueen would show up. The new mayor had shut out journalists since his shocking Election Day victory, blaming them — along with other city leaders — for Corpus Christi’s struggles.

Texas is also one of the states in the country with the highest murder rate, and the highest death penalty rate. In fact it recently set the bail of a man accused of murder at the low, low price of $4 billion. Wait, what? Yes you read that right - $4 billion. With a B.

There are fewer than 400 people in the United States who could afford to have Antonio Marquis Willis released from jail on bond, thanks to a record-setting figure fixed by a justice of the peace.

Willis, who is facing charges of first-degree murder for the Dec. 21, 2016 death of Donte Samuels in Killeen, Texas, turned himself in to police this past Thursday. On Wednesday night, a justice of the peace set his bond at $4 billion, according to the Temple Daily Telegram.

KWTX, citing jail records, reported that the bond had been set at $999,999,999, but that number is only present on the Sheriff’s website because the jail’s computer system couldn’t recognize a higher number, according to the Daily Telegram, which interviewed Bell County Deputy Chief Chuck Cox.

But the craziest thing Texas has done lately? Gov. Abbott – the guy who replaced Rick “I can’t name 3 branches of government I want to cut” Perry, not only sides with Trump on the controversial, illegal, and unconstitutional Muslim ban, he’s threatening to bring the hammer down! What the fuck? Is he Thor now?

AUSTIN — Gov. Greg Abbott on Wednesday threatened to "bring the hammer down on Dallas County" if it acts on its new resolution welcoming unauthorized immigrants.

The symbolic resolution that Dallas County commissioners approved Tuesday may have put a chunk of its budget squarely in the cross hairs of Republican lawmakers in Austin and Washington who are determined to outlaw so-called sanctuary cities in Texas.

The commissioners essentially thumbed their noses at GOP state leaders' anti-sanctuary efforts, calling on local law enforcement agencies to "end nonessential collaborations with Immigration and Customs Enforcement."

"If anybody acts on that resolution to make Dallas a sanctuary city, if any sanctuary city policy is implemented in any way, the hammer will come down on them," Abbott said.

Read more: http://www.dallasnews.com/news/texas-legislature/2017/02/08/dallas-county-gop-crosshairs-immigration-resolution

[font size="4"]And the winner is… [/font]

Texas! Texas easily routs Kentucky with a final score of 81 – 67. Kentucky may be kings when it comes to basketball, but Texas is king when it comes to crazy. But Texas isn’t out of the woods yet – they still face some extremely stiff competition from Florida. Next time, we’ll return to the Batshit Conference – yes the same conference two times in a row – where the all time division champions Florida – who lost to Arizona last year – are taking on extremely hot newcomer #2 – Maine.

[font size="8"]And now this:[/font]
[font size="8"]A Tribe Called Quest[/font]

You know folks, there’s political statements at award shows every single year. But A Tribe Called Quest really stepped up the game here at the Grammys this weekend. So we’ll end with this.

Yeah how about that?

We’re going to take a week off next week, we’ll be back on Wed. March 1st with a brand new edition! See you in two weeks!

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