A couple of Mormons just knocked on my door...

[MrScorpio]

They wanted to know if I've heard of Jesus Chri... That's when I interrupted them and asked them if they were Mormons... Which wasn't hard to notice that they were, being that they were both white, clean cut young women, both wearing name tags on their drably colored cardigans and long, unremarkable skirts that went down to their overly-sensible shoes.

One of them asked me what I've heard about Mormons, to which I told them that it all depended on whom I was talking to. I really don't have problems with Mormons, unless they're knocking on my door.... Which they had done. But as a matter of fact, back in Virginia, my next door neighbors were a couple of older Mormon missionaries who were very pleasant people. So no harm, no foul.

But today, I wasn't in any mood to be proselytized to, so I simply told them to get the fuck off my property in the most polite way possible.

Sadly, this is probably the most exciting thing that's going to happen to me all day.

[pangaia]

1. Bravo! Proselytized is wrong.

[Gothmog]

2. There is a mormon temple near my house

We get missionaries from time to time. I think that they get double points if they convert a Jew.

[elljay]

32. They've probably already converted you

They are trying to convert everyone who has ever lived on the earth, alive or dead. The church did agree to stop posthumously baptizing Jewish Holocaust victims, but I believe them not at all. To me, this is proof there is no life after death because if there were, I can promise that any of my ancestors who were posthumously converted would make a beeline for Salt Lake City and I wouldn't want to be prophet Monson if that happened.

[PasadenaTrudy]

35. I live right next to one!

They never come up to my apts luckily.

[COLGATE4]

72. Double points?? Hell, they probably get their

own planet if they convert a Jew.

[daleanime]

3. Not necessary a bad thing....

[Arugula Latte]

4. Well, good thing they weren't some of those Militant Atheists I keep hearing about,

you know, the ones who come to your door to tell you you're going to burn for all eternity for believing in a god ... Oh, wait ...

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

17. I've never had a Militant Atheist at the door, but ...

... I've run into a few "Proselytizing Atheists", and they can be just as annoying as any other proselytizers.

Being unsure, not knowing (agnostic), that is just unacceptable weak sauce.

[Fritz Walter]

5. Just for that, they're going to baptize all your ancestors!

That's the reason I stopped using their "library" to do Geneology research!

[hamsterjill]

31. Oh yes...we have a family member who converted to Mormonism.

We went through this when my father passed away in 2010. She asked permission from my sister to do this, and I was not happy about the request.

[Fritz Walter]

54. At least they asked

I'm not so sure that others were extended that courtesy.

[hamsterjill]

75. Yes, that's correct.

n/t

[Mariana]

81. Oh, they'll get to your ancestors eventually

if they haven't already. I believe the ultimate goal is to try to baptize everyone who has ever lived.

[LanternWaste]

6. I do that to political canvassers proselytizing their favored candidate.

I do that to political canvassers proselytizing their favored candidate. Annoying as hell when people come to my door to tell me what they're selling will save the nation-- whether it's secular or religious.

[nykym]

7. One thing that gets them to go away

I am a male.
When they knocked on my door and asked if I knew Jesus blah blah blah.
I asked them to wait a minute while I go get my husband....
They left pretty quickly.

[MrScorpio]

8. Nice move. nt

[yeoman6987]

29. That's even better then what my mom used

They would ask about Jesus Christ and my mom would say, "absolutely. We were just about to start the rosery please come in and join us. They couldn't get away fast enough. Lol.

[snooper2]

9. Dude, you did NOT handle that correctly- Watch this video for what you should do LOL

Your OP reminds me of one of the best Youtube videos EVER!

[MrScorpio]

10. Naaah.

Looks like too much trouble for my tastes.

[notadmblnd]

59. What you need to do is keep a list of chores

really icky ones like cleaning the bbq grill. Tell them you can talk because your are busy. Generally they will offer to help and presto chango, you got your chores done and that will be the last visit you get from the young missionaries.

[2naSalit]

19. Wow

those religion pimps can get violent! I'd be speed dialing the cops and use the video as evidence. Who the hell does that clown think he is telling someone to get in the house in their own yard when he was the intruder? POS.

Notice it also didn't take to seconds for Ms. holier-than-thou to start cussing.

[Ron Obvious]

11. I've never encountered women Mormon missionaries before...

I see them (young male ones that is) in our neighbourhood all the time, as I walk a lot. They always seem astonished that I can spot them a mile off and that I'm not interested in religious discussions or the proper care and feeding of my immortal soul.

They're always so earnest, unlike many Jehovah's, that I can't bring myself to be really rude to them, even though, frankly, if you knock on my door, you don't have the moral high ground as I have a large red "no soliciting" sign prominently displayed.

[Arugula Latte]

12. Most of them are 19-year-old kids who have lived in a sheltered bubble

their entire childhoods. Who better to tell you how to conduct your life!

[cwydro]

21. One of those sheltered kids who "lives in a bubble" was blown up in the Brussels attack.

Very lucky to be alive. He's been doing his Mormon thing in Europe for two years.

I'm no fan of Mormons, but I love how judgmental DUers are of certain religions, while hands off on others.

[Warpy]

28. So one of them was in the vicinity when a bomb went off

so now they're all candidates for sainthood?

You might want to rethink that.

The Mormons want to rethink calling teenagers "elders."

[cwydro]

47. He's been traveling around Europe for two years.

That's hardly "in a bubble." Where did I mention sainthood? Huh?

I would just love to see a thread like this about Muslims. Oh no, there would be pearl clutching and fainting spells.

Hypocrisy, thy name is DU.

[X_Digger]

62. Free hint: You can take your bubble wherever you go. n/t

[cwydro]

64. Hey, I do agree with that.

But even the Christian missionaries of yore...found out that their bubble was not made of iron.

People who go into countries with Ebola, for example, have my utmost respect. I may not necessarily care for the reasons they do so, but many accomplish things that none of us ever will.

[Warpy]

66. They used to call that the Grand Tour

so don't expect any sympathy from me.

Muslims fare better because they don't lean on my doorbell after I've worked a 12 hour night shift. They are good neighbors who don't make pests of themselves.

[xfundy]

79. OK, here ya go.

FUCK MOHAMMED. Fuck Allah!

Happy now?

[KatyMan]

30. So were many Belgians.

Your point?

[cwydro]

69. And yours?

Brussels is a major hub in Europe.

Many nationalities travel through there.

If you missed my point, then never mind.

[PasadenaTrudy]

36. I'm judgmental on ALL religions nt

[HERVEPA]

37. Yeh, but Mormons aren't judgemental, right? Ever hear of prop 8. Know who funded that?

Anti-gay and atheist Boy Scouts. Know who that is? Baptizing Jews after their death in the holocaust. Know who that is?
Fuck the Mormons.

[a la izquierda]

39. My mother is a lesbian and my uncle is gay.

Mormons and all other judgmental religious folks trying to convert people can fuck right off.

[cwydro]

48. I'm gay too. So is my sister and most of my friends.

But if anyone dares to speak against Islam and its homophobic practices here on DU, oh my, that is just so WRONG.

I just hate hypocrisy. Period.

[csziggy]

41. While I am sorry he got injured why does Belgium need missionaries?

Haven't the people of Belgium had hundreds of years to select their religion? Why should some ignorant American teenager think their ludicrous cult would be worth the time of any European?

More likely the Mormon was living the rough life just as Mitt Romney did while proselytizing in Paris when he was young. Such hardship Mitt and Ann went through.

By the way, I feel about the same of any religion. I might have more consideration for some individuals, but religion overall

[cwydro]

49. Good lord. I'm quite sure he was transitting trhough Brussels, which is a European hub.

I have no idea where he was or where he's been.

I hate all organized religion, but I find it funny how only certain religions are allowed to be held up to ridicule here.

And you know it's true. So fuck hypocrisy.

[awoke_in_2003]

43. All religion is fiction

and not very good fiction at that. None deserve respect, IMO

[cwydro]

50. I'm with you on that one in general.

However, I try to respect all people with whom I come into contact.

As a gay woman, I've sure met my share of religious jerks, but I feel completely confident in stating my position to them without having to tell them to "fuck off."

Often, they actually listen. Perhaps, they go back to their religious dens and say, "Oh my goodness. I met a lesbian, and she was actually nice to me!"

Who knows? Who cares? I was raised to treat others with respect, and I do.

[awoke_in_2003]

58. I usually just tell them I am not interested...

but I did get cross with the last group that came from the Baptist church about 5 blocks away. I only got cross because I have told them at least 5 times to heed my no soliciting sign and to, once again, put my house on their no-knock list. I only had to tell LDS that once.

[cwydro]

60. You are the only one I know besides me who uses the word "cross"

to describe being annoyed.

My parents are English and being "cross" was NEVER a good thing.

Your post is perfect. Yes, if they continue to intrude, I get cross also.

I often feel sorry for the Jehovah's Witness folks. They drag along their small children all dressed up. Even the adults look kind of sad to me, and I cannot bring myself to be rude. I just say that I'm sorry, just as you do, that I'm not interested.

I found out that saying I was gay just made them more compelled to "save" me lol. They stopped knocking on the door, but they left so many Bibles. This was back in the day. I live way back in the woods now (most of the time) or I'm at my mom's (secure condo)...but I can see them sometimes out on the street. I actually feel sorry for them.

I just can't be this horrid person to them that so many here claim to be (though I believe about .02% of these anecdotes).

[3catwoman3]

78. My mother used to say "cross" all the time.

She was born in 1922, and I in 1951. How about you?

[Arugula Latte]

65. Hey, I think all religions are absolutely nonsensical and moronic,

so I'm an equal-opportunity religion hater.

[Arugula Latte]

67. Also, I said "most of them."

[hfojvt]

13. overly sensible shoes?

Long, unremarkable skirts?

Seems to be implied criticism in that description.

That reminds me of an incident in my distant past. I had a customer in my store. A youngish woman, about 30, close to my own age at the time, married, of course. She would typically wear a long skirt, going about halfway between her knees and ankles. Probably not wearing much make up either, not that I noticed one way or the other.

One day her twin sister came into the store. They were clearly identical twins, but they didn't dress the same. This sister had on a tight t-shirt and shorts that were also tight - and short. Wow!

I thought that was an interesting contrast. While on the one hand it was certainly nice to get 3 times the US RDA of eye candy for the day, I would not berate the other sister for dressing the way she did.

[MrScorpio]

16. It wasn't criticism at all.

It was just a recognition that they made it a point of dressing modestly, as Mormons are wont to do.

As far as I'm concerned, they can dress anyway they please.

[lunatica]

14. that's the kind of Freedom from Religion I espouse

My attitude is "just stay away from me about your religion unless I ask you." Period.

[SDJay]

18. I Used to Fuck With These People

in elaborate ways, but that's when I was single, without children and had time on my hands. I'd answer the door in really old tighty-whites and act like everything was normal, one time I put on my girlfriend's bikini bottoms... they never stuck around.

Now I just politely ask them if they keep a list of houses not to bother in the future. If they do, I ask them to put me on it. If they don't, I ask them to make some sort of note and to give it to whoever organizes this stuff. Then I ask them to leave.

Most of the time they do, but every once in a while I'll get a persistent God-squadder who tries to engage me. At that point I just tell them to get the fuck off of my property and if I see them again I'm letting the dogs out on them and calling the cops.

I have always found this type of stuff to be extremely offensive. Who the hell are you to think that you have the right to go bother others about their religious beliefs or lack thereof? Fuck off.

[awoke_in_2003]

45. The Mormons took me off their list

the baptists haven't. Bastards.

[SDJay]

46. I Don't Think We've Had Any Baptists Here...

but Mormons and Jehovah's Witness folks are around all the time. Almost all of them will come to the end of our driveway, look at their list and keep going to the next house.

Best of luck with your Baptist avoidance!

[TeeYiYi]

20. Did you actually say...

...,"get the fuck off my property." ?

TYY

[IDemo]

22. A homemade sign on the front door of a house in our neighborhood

Said simply: "If you're selling God or goods, please leave".

[a la izquierda]

40. My kind of sign.

I just have a "No soliciting- Democratic literature can go in the mailbox."

[bigwillq]

23. I believe in the devil.

Is what I usually tell all the religious folks that come to my door.
I don't care what anyone believes in, just don't peddle your religion at my door.
I really dislike that. Really, really dislike it.

[Warpy]

24. it's their opening that gets me

"Have you heard about Jesus Christ?" Honestly, you dopes, do you think anybody in this god soaked country could possibly avoid being as old as I am without hearing about him ad nauseum? Do you think I'm stupid or that I've just recently moved out of a cave up in the mountains after a life as a feral child?

I've always wanted to ask them a few of these things in the hope of knocking their unmitigated gall down a few pegs. However, they very wisely cross the street when they get to my house.

[Fuddnik]

77. Funny thing.

We went to see Book of Mormon in downtown Tampa a few months back.

When we left, after the show, they were outside the hall passing out tracts and literature.

[U4ikLefty]

80. That was an freakin' hilarious play. nt

[Kalidurga]

25. I've taken to a sort of the same approach

I let them start talking then I shut the door when they are in the middle of a sentence.

[nichomachus]

26. Maggie Smith said it best

[Glimmer of Hope]

44. She speaks for me.

[Skittles]

27. those who have knocked on my door have been unfailingly polite

I simply tell them I am not interested

[haele]

33. My husband used to be the "final test" for local missionaries before they'd go out on their own.

Being as he had been a member of a college debate team, a non-militant atheist, and a blue ribbon survivor of four years of Bible Camp (he can still recite chapter and verse most of the KJV thirty five years later, without hesitation.). He also worked evenings at the time, so twice a month or so, he'd find the same alternating group of elders (JW, 7th Day, and Mormon) would come by around 2:30 in the afternoon during the week with a new pair of missionaries to try out on him. He'd politely invite them in, offer them a coke or water, beat them at bible verses while the elder would usually sit quietly, and send them off after an hour or so.
He thought he was showing them how silly their religion was, until he was greeted by the JW elder in a grocery store, and thanked for being so tough on the young'uns. That's when he found out he was being used by three different churches to test the faith and resolve of their missionaries before they were sent out.
He told the elder that he should be paid then - too much time out of his day, and even though it had been fun, he'd rather be reading if he really hadn't taught the young ones how to think or question. He wasn't into "Doing God's Work" playing the neighborhood Jesuit. Pretty soon, they all stopped coming by.

Funny what a bill for consultant services will do.

Haele

[shanti]

34. i generally don't answer my door if not expecting anyone

and have one of these at eye level.

guess that keeps them away, lol!

[NCjack]

42. I have found them to be very pleasant folks. I tell them up front that I'm

an atheist, and they are welcome to talk to me while they help me with a few chores before my nap. They do some heavy lifting for me, we have a glass of water, and I start by telling them that they have been sold a bill of goods. That gets off to a fun start. After a while, we are both rested and I tell them "goodbye" -- I've got to take my nap. It's my heart you know. You wouldn't want to be responsible for it. And they leave. Nice folks. Once I had a pair of them come by regularly. They said they realized they would never convert me, but it was nice to have a place to sit, relax, visit and not be arguing religion. Sure hope they grew up to be different than the Romney kids.

[Vinca]

38. We usually get Jehovah's Witnesses coming to the door.

I love to mess with their heads. Once I got them to admit the Bible was fiction.

[Press Virginia]

53. Hey now, they give out comic books

[Albertoo]

51. Is it OK to shoot religious proselytizers without warning?

Just asking.

[Press Virginia]

52. Hand them a copy of The Watchtower

and ask them if they know about Jehova

[Warren DeMontague]

55. All religious proselytizers get the same answer from me, regardless of denomination-

"It would be physically impossible for me to be less interested. Thanks, see ya"

[DesertFlower]

56. i used to curse them and tell them

to get off my property. now i just nicely tell them i'm an atheist.

[IDemo]

57. I live in Mormon country

Almost all of my former workgroup at a local high tech facility were Mormon. They were great to work with and never proselytized. The boss was even the key reference in getting me hired at another company. Even though missionaries are not an uncommon sight around the neighborhood, our house seems to be off limits. I like to joke that they probably have a red 'X' next to our address on the spreadsheet. Too old, childless, known liberals, who knows?

[longship]

61. They always come in twos.

They always dress alike, just like the Bobsie Twins.

When one sees such aparitions on ones doorstep one knows that they are of The LDS church. They occasionally knock on my door, although I don't know why they bother. I live in the midst of the Manistee National Forest. Nobody lives here; the roads are not even paved. Anybody but me are Protestant wacka-loons, which does not make for fertile territory for religious converts, especially for Mormons.

Nevertheless, they soldier on. I still get the occasional knock on the door. I am always polite when I invite them to get fucking lost.

But why do they always dress alike?

[karynnj]

63. My daughter had a nice experience with them when she was

A junior in college who had just moved to an apartment. They knocked on her door while she was less than successfully putting a new bookcase together. She told them she was really busy and not interested.

One of them suggested that if she brought the bookcase to the hall, they could quickly put it together for her as they spoke. She thought it was a pretty good deal, but because she is very honest she told them the offer was so tempting, but she had grown up Jewish and was agnostic and that wasn't going to change.

They helped her by putting the bookcase together, wishing her well and telling her they hoped she would reconsider.

[SheilaT]

73. Now THAT'S

living your religion. I am in awe of those two.

[karynnj]

74. My daughter was too

They were very very nice.

[Deadshot]

68. I don't answer my door when I see there's Mormons standing there.

I have no patience for proselytizing.

One of these times, I'm going to be tempted to open the door and start reading from one of Lovecraft's works. "Have you heard the good word of Dagon?"

[TeamPooka]

70. There goes the neighborhood. nt

[mia]

71. Hardly anyone ever knocks on my door to share their joy.

But when they do, no matter who they are, I thank them for their concern and wish them well. It's easier, and allows me to continue on with my life. One day, we will all wish that someone would just knock.

[brewens]

76. I in one of their facilities. Their picture of Christ looked like a blonde surfer dude! It was a

blood drive at some activity center on a university campus. Good bunch and good blood rive. I've always gotten along with Mormons well, especially the one's that can hold their liquor!

That picture slayed me! One of the most ridiculous I've ever seen! I couldn't stop looking at it and chuckling. It's wonder they have the nerve, especially on a racially diverse campus. Like some kid from the middle east they may try and convert isn't going to think bullshit when he sees that?