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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsMom Fights School Policy That Says Girls “Must” Wear T-Shirts at Pool
Source: Babble
When your child brings home a form from school for you to sign, do you gloss over it, mindlessly scribble your signature, and go about your business? I dont know about you, but Im guilty as charged.
Jennifer Smith is different. The Indiana mom is proclaiming victory after flagging something in her sons school permission slip she felt could ultimately prove harmful to elementary school girls a dress code requirement for a sixth-grade pool party. The form, a picture of which Smith posted to a Facebook feminist group, included a stipulation that all girls wear non-white T-shirts over their swimsuits. No similar requirement was targeted at boys, unless you count a No Speedos rule.
Its just the latest in a recent string of stories about parents or students being outraged over dress codes for female pupils. But Smiths experience could prove encouraging for anyone disturbed by apparent gender inequality in school dress codes Smiths complaints brought about change within days and she didnt even have to stage protests to make it happen.
<snip>
But Smith fired back with academic research to justify her concerns. She wrote:
I am not sure if you are aware of the emotional hardship that is caused by [telling] young girls their bodies are inappropriate and must be covered. According to Siegel (1999), negative feelings about their bodies account for the higher prevalence of depressive symptomatology and lower self-esteem among girls (p.163). As you are aware adolescence is a very confusing time and can also be detrimental to girls emotional wellbeing. Setting one standard for half of the student body only promotes the idea that girls bodies are naturally shameful, and helps to send a very damaging message of you are reasonable for others thoughts, feelings, and actions that they will carry with them for the rest of their lives.
Read more: http://www.babble.com/parenting/mom-fights-school-policy-that-says-girls-must-wear-t-shirts-at-pool/
As a parent of a son, she took it upon herself to speak up for the girls in her son's class/grade. What a great role model for all the children involved. That is one kick-ass woman!
ann---
(1,933 posts)Can you imagine what happens if the girls were allowed to wear
bikinis - or low cut tops - at a school pool party? And, if it's really
a SWIMMING party - it's much safer to wear a one piece or have
a tee shirt on to cover over it.
Sixth grade girls should be taught modesty - it's NOT shaming.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Umm... I'm trying to imagine what happens.
They are able to swim?
I pretty much spent most summers between the age of 7 and 14 on a swim team. We had plenty of parties with a large mixed group of that age range wearing all sorts of swimsuits, mostly speedos, and I can't remember anything drastic happening.
What is it that happens? I must have missed it.
What pool allows anyone to wear shirts in the water?
Cal Carpenter
(4,959 posts)Satan comes out of the pool drains and turns the boys into rape-y monsters with no self control and it is all the girls' fault. For being human girls. Because boys will be boys, which means they are half a second from being rape-y at all times.
Or something.
treestar
(82,383 posts)DemocratSinceBirth
(99,705 posts)I thought competitive women swimmers wear one piece swim suits because of the danger of the top coming off on a two piece swim suit.
glowing
(12,233 posts)In time... Most are wearing almost
A running suit looking item.
A pool party is completely different and if the school is so worried about being able to chaperone, then don't host the party
PRB
(139 posts)These kids are not adults. You dress them down and pretty much the perverted little boys come out of the woodwork. 11 year old boys don't need much encouragement.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)have to cover up, and not the boys?
PRB
(139 posts)It's a safety issue for the girls. You can almost never have too much supervision.
randome
(34,845 posts)Boys and girls should be allowed to wear whatever they want. What do you think will happen at a public swim party?
[hr][font color="blue"][center]Birds are territorial creatures.
The lyrics to the songbird's melodious trill go something like this:
"Stay out of my territory or I'll PECK YOUR GODDAMNED EYES OUT!"[/center][/font][hr]
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)What on earth happens?
randome
(34,845 posts)Or is it 'nudge, nudge, wink, wink'? I'M SO CONFUSED!
[hr][font color="blue"][center]Birds are territorial creatures.
The lyrics to the songbird's melodious trill go something like this:
"Stay out of my territory or I'll PECK YOUR GODDAMNED EYES OUT!"[/center][/font][hr]
treestar
(82,383 posts)A HERETIC I AM
(24,321 posts)Lots and lots of sexy, sexy sex.
Lots of it.
Tons in fact.
The hormones spill out onto the street.
They have to call the pool guy in to clean the flters extra good.
ITS SEX, I SAY! Horrible, horrible dirty, naughty, screaming till the cops come sexy ssex, dammit.
And not a moment too soon, ether.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)We swam, dove, listened to music, played various water games, ate pizza, and got bit by mosquitos.
Either my attention was distracted during all of the sex, or I just didn't go to the right parties.
A HERETIC I AM
(24,321 posts)I was on a swim team in Maryland in the late 60's/early 70's.
Girls and boys, speedos and all.
The naughtiest thing I ever saw was me, swiping Raspberries that stuck through the fence of a house I passed on the way home from early morning practice.
WorseBeforeBetter
(11,441 posts)It's a wonder I managed to become a productive member of society what with all the exposed flesh. Tennis skirts, midriffs, peanut pants, short shorts... tsk.
treestar
(82,383 posts)The halter tops too. I even wore them. Yet retained my virginity past the 8th grade. How strange.
WorseBeforeBetter
(11,441 posts)Tube tops, too. Tube tops, tight jeans and Bear Traps... now *that* was a look.
treestar
(82,383 posts)so low that you had to wear a body suit (top that snapped under your groin) rather than just a top/blouse. And flared out as wide as possible, or as wide as it ever got in the 70s. You had to have a belt to keep them up.
WorseBeforeBetter
(11,441 posts)Skin-tight maroon bodysuit, low-rise tan cords, and Wallabees, circa 1974 or so. Oh, yeah.
Response to WorseBeforeBetter (Reply #251)
Name removed Message auto-removed
elehhhhna
(32,076 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Getting up from your desk at school and doing that "front book carry" thing.
On the swim team, jumping back in the cold water was always a good idea.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)I always wore loose fit(not necessarily baggy) jeans for a reason. I see these guys in skinny jeans and I just think about how much pain I would have been in when one of my random, and sometimes not so random stiffies occur.
treestar
(82,383 posts)I call shenanigans!
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)...and not in sixth grade.
Hell Hath No Fury
(16,327 posts)Am I reading what I am reading on DU??
I went to a school sponsored boy/girl pool party when I was around 12. Since it was the early 70s we all wore bikinis. Every single girl. Mine was a ice blue velvet with side cutouts on the bottoms.
Oh, did I mention I went to a Catholic school?
Even with a bunch of half-naked, wet teen girls all around them the boys in my class were far more interested in doing cannon ball and "nut cracker" dives off the diving board than in us.
Here, this site might be a better fit for you --
http://www.covenanteyes.com/2013/08/16/biblical-definition-of-modesty/
Sheldon Cooper
(3,724 posts)etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)One does not penalize one gender because they are afraid another gender will act poorly.
if one is claiming worry about sun exposure .... do they not care about the boys ...?
TexasMommaWithAHat
(3,212 posts)It's about the couple of over sexualized girls who will inevitably show up in an itty, bitty string bikini.
demmiblue
(36,751 posts)The only people who seem to be sexualizing them are you and ann. Says a lot about your thinking process.
Gross.
(And I bet, dollars to donuts, that neither of you are women)
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)gollygee
(22,336 posts)They just want to wear what is in fashion. It isn't an issue of them being sexualized, it's an issue of small bathing suits being fashionable. The fashions are a result of women and girls being sexualized, but it isn't fair to assume that those specific girls are over sexualized.
But most 12-year-olds are still shopping in kid/tween shops or departments, and you don't see particularly immodest bathing suits there. Those shops/departments go up to size kids 16, and most kids aren't in sizes bigger than that until 13 or later. My 13-year-old has just moved into adult sizes and only because she's unusually tall, so she's moved into them earlier than most of her friends.
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)assuming the female was comfortable with it of course.
When you get down to it, forcing one gender to wear an article of clothing of any kind (bikini top/t-shirt/burka) while allowing another gender to not wear anything at all is sexist/misogynistic, just to different degrees
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)This is clearly very difficult for you to follow.
I am sorry
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)is possibly a violation of Title IX.
There are many places that allow topless/nude swimming/sunbathing, both here in the US and overseas.
If you think it is OK to MANDATE that a female wear certain articles of clothing while making it OPTIONAL for men to wear those same articles, could you please explain why?
This may seem silly to you but I am trying to discern why it seems to be OK to mandate some type of top (bikini/one-piece/t-shirt/burka) for females and not for males.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)Google Gwen Jacobs; Guelph, Ontario
Women continue to dress as they choose in Ontario (I have spent much time in Ontario and have not seen any women choose to be topless, but that is irrelevant), the idea is that the mere exposure of one's breasts is not viewed as inherently indecent. Ontario's court decisions were based on the idea that there cannot be separate requirements for the way women dress (vs men)
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)just males is the only intellectually consistent argument and one in keeping with equal rights/equal protection.
Those saying it is OK to MANDATE females wear clothing that males do not have to wear in identical situations are wrong. I find it hard to imagine why it would be OK to mandate bikini tops but not burkas. Once you allow the non-equal treatment then it is only a matter of degree, not principle.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)... for whatever reason (attributable to me) i though you were arguing that it was correct to demand that women dress in specific ways to prevent provoking a sexual response in others.
Iggo
(47,489 posts)truebrit71
(20,805 posts).....back to the 18th century with you....
I cannot believe the vulgarity I read on DU. Is there something
wrong with modesty and decent language? Or you think just
because liberals post here everyone has the same ideas on
what is proper for young girls?
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)trumad
(41,692 posts)Maybe this isn't the place for you.
ann---
(1,933 posts)DU has become a bottomless pit where "anything goes" should be the standard in this
country. Never thought an innocent remark on the side of modesty would bring out
such hatred in DU'ers for those who have a different opinion.
Since when is modesty wrong?
trumad
(41,692 posts)ann---
(1,933 posts)I am not preaching - I am giving my opinion.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)I disagree with her, but I cannot understand why you would attack her.
DISCUSSION BOARD, right???
Sometimes I think folks here just want an echo chamber of their own views.
GoneOffShore
(17,309 posts)cwydro
(51,308 posts)We gotta gang up and have a pile on for that reason?
I don't agree with her, but I just have to laugh when DU turns into bully central...
Hypocrites...And it is always the same posters who show up for a pile on.
Funny. And revealing.
GoneOffShore
(17,309 posts)Should be pointed at and laughed at.
"Oh, it's just my opinion.... on global warming, gay marriage, abortion, creationism, vaccinations, chemtrails, et. al"
cwydro
(51,308 posts)As long as you consider an opinion stupid...well, that is all good.
You do realize that this is a discussion board, right? That means others get to express their opinions? Right?
Or do you prefer an echo chamber of your own views? I'm thinking yes.
I don't agree with Ann, but I cannot believe the pile-on/bullying on this site by supposed "progressives".
Sheesh.
GoneOffShore
(17,309 posts)No, I don't prefer an echo chamber.
Informed, fact based opinions are worth discussing. Ones that aren't deserve laughter and ridicule.
Ann's fit into the latter.
And she is looking for the right to not be offended.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)I am not sure what you are getting at since while you say "You do realize that this is a discussion board, right? That means others get to express their opinions?" you also seem to be chiding others for expressing their opinions. So we can discuss, but if we reply to someone that is...bad?
"others get to express their opinions" but others expressing their opinions is wrong?
Matariki
(18,775 posts)One policy for girls and a different one for boys isn't 'modesty' - it's shaming girls about their bodies.
And also, this isn't the 19th century. When do girls where t-shirts in a pool?
ann---
(1,933 posts)That is the whole problem with a lot of liberals today. They
are too "out there" and cannot think of anything without
seeing political correctness.
Modesty is modesty - period. Asking girls to be modest is not
sexist. Besides, the school's note did say no "Speedos" which
was for the boys. I'm okay with that, too. So, am I sexist if
I believe both boys and girls should dress modestly for a pool party
at a school?
Matariki
(18,775 posts)You probably really believe you're not being sexist. However. You are advocating a DOUBLE STANDARD for girls. Pretty much the definition of sexist.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)"the whole problem with a lot of liberals today" is speaking out against racism?
"the whole problem with a lot of liberals today" is speaking out against sexism?
Hey, guess what. It isn't "political correctness" but being a liberal.
"Modesty is modesty - period."? Nope. Modesty, like love, is in the eye of the beholder. Otherwise why are some in burqas, some topless, depending on the country?
LadyHawkAZ
(6,199 posts)Please tell us where else we're doing it wrong. Comprehensive sex ed? Birth control covered by insurance? Abortion rights? Equal pay for equal work? No more glass ceilings? What other "liberal" ideas have we silly girls been mistakenly thinking were good for our daughters? Inquiring minds want to know.
LeftyMom
(49,212 posts)They have the internet up there?
gollygee
(22,336 posts)It's weird to expect people to wear something other than a swimming suit. If you want to only have modest swimming suits, make rules about what swimming suits are allowed. Street clothes don't belong in swimming pools and it isn't normal to make a rule requiring that.
Also, are the boys allowed to go bare-chested, or are they required to wear shirts too?
ann---
(1,933 posts)had to wear the t-shirt while swimming, did it? Boys are
allowed to go bare-chested because they are boys. Duh
gollygee
(22,336 posts)and it doesn't say they can take it off in the pool.
A girl in a swimsuit is not less modest than a boy in a swimsuit. If they feel a need to have the girls wear more clothing, then it seems like they'd want the boys to wear more too. Unless they're just being sexist.
ann---
(1,933 posts)I think the school may be expecting some of those young girls
to come to the party in suits that may be immodest and
wearing a t-shirt would take care of that. Maybe the school
anticipates that some of the parents (like some in this thread) wouldn't
care if their young, developing daughters wore revealing suits simply
because "boys can do it."
I just don't understand where the morals are today in this world - regardless
of whether one votes Dem or not - there are still ethics and self-respect we can teach our
children. Expecting modesty from young girls at a pool party doesn't stifle
their womanhood in any way. It teaches them to respect themselves.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)they could have easily made requirements about the swimsuit. My daughter has had to wear a "modest 1-piece" swimsuit for some things. Making them wear a t-shirt doesn't teach them to respect themselves. It teaches them that they are dirty and have to be covered. Shame is not a good teaching tool.
SEEN some of the suits and bikinis that young girls
wear today? It's NOT teaching them that it's "dirty" not
to cover up body parts that should be covered up in public, the requirement
ensures that ALL girls will be covered regardless of what they wear. If
they could be counted on to wear a modest suit for a 6th grader, it
would not be necessary. Obviously, the parent in this case who is
whining about her daughter not being able to parade around the way
SHE wants her to makes it obvious that the school would anticipate
that parents are not choosy about what their daughters wear.
Thus the requirement to avoid problems. I just do not understand what
the problem is.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)ann---
(1,933 posts)don't have the same kind of breasts.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)uppityperson
(115,674 posts)moobs to show and they be required to wear a t-shirt over their flat chests?
MineralMan
(146,192 posts)That will be news to anatomists. Boys have exactly the same tissues in their breasts as girls, complete with erectile nipples. They just don't have the hormones needed to stimulate breast growth at puberty. Well, most of the time. Gynecomastia is very common in adolescent boys. Their breasts enlarge due to a hormone imbalance. Give a man the right hormones and he will produce milk, even.
Men have exactly the same breasts as women. They just haven't been activated by female hormones. They're there, though, and have every structure a woman's breast have. You simply do not have the correct facts.
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)LOTS of boys have the same kind of breasts, especially in America.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)It's NOT teaching them that it's "dirty" not to cover up body parts that should be covered up in public
Yes, it is teaching them that it is dirty to not cover up all the parts you think SHOULD be covered. That is exactly what this is. YOU want to chose what they SHOULD cover for what YOU consider modest.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)6 and 13. I know what suits are available and you're exaggerating. Regardless, they could have made rules about what suits were acceptable as easily as they made this rule.
ann---
(1,933 posts)had told parents what type of bathing suits the girls
must wear, there would be an even worse uproar than
this whiny parent who doesn't want to follow the rules.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)this is getting into "I don't drink with you" territory. Parents are routinely told that girls must have one-piece bathing suits. I have girls, and I have experience here. That would be expected.
ann---
(1,933 posts)one piece bathing suits were required.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)the parents would probably have not been surprised as that's pretty common. They didn't have to require shirts. That wasn't easier.
ann---
(1,933 posts)How do you know if that same whiny parent wouldn't complain
about having to wear a one-piece suit?
Bottom line - the school can make the rules for the party, in my view.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)And IMO they should if the rules are set up to create an atmosphere of shame for developing girls.
Bye
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)Well played.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)I completely disagree with Ann, but really?
Is it necessary to be so rude to someone just because you disagree?
treestar
(82,383 posts)I don't know that we have to drive out everyone with a varying view.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)wear t-shirts and the school said no.
Due to the varying sizes of students at this age, [making T-shirts mandatory] takes away the ability of kiddos making fun of others for wearing a shirt [since] everyone is required to wear one, she wrote.
But Smith fired back with academic research to justify her concerns. She wrote:
(clip)
Smiths proposed solution? Make everyone boys and girls wear T-shirts.
According to emails provided to me by Smith, neither the principal nor the superintendent were on board with that idea. Metropolitan District of Wayne Township superintendent Dr. Jeff Butts said that he supported the elementary schools efforts to address the concerns that have arisen from past events of this nature.
treestar
(82,383 posts)that are "very inappropriate."
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)Unlike you.
You promote sexist bullshit.
Honestly, do you know how you sound? Like the fucking Church Lady.
There, more vulgarity for you. Maybe you should go fetch your smelling salts and fainting couch before you get a fit of the vapors.
ann---
(1,933 posts)a great example of why DU is not the place it used to be.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)Buh bye!
TexasMommaWithAHat
(3,212 posts)for some guys, anyway.
My neighbor's daughter had the body of an eighteen year old when she was thirteen. When we'd be there for neighborhood barbecues/pool parties, my husband would cringe when this child would walk through the house in her itty bitty bikini without a coverup through a roomful of men. Shouldn't grown men be uncomfortable around a young teen in a very sexy bikini?
As for the school party, I think it's wrong to tell girls that they have to wear a coverup in the pool, but some girls will inevitably show up in very, very tiny suits. I just don't understand the mindset that puts a twelve year old in a string bikini.
My daughters didn't wear bikinis until high school, and even then we had some limits. No string bikinis. No thong bikinis.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)Yes girls' bodies develop around this age, but that isn't a bad thing. It's biologically normal. Although this was a 6th grade party so they would be 12, not 13 yet, and there's a lot of physical maturity for girls between 12 and 13, but they'd still be in the process of maturing, and some might be pretty physically mature.
It's the job of adults to be appropriate around kids regardless of what they're wearing. My husband was around our then 12-year-old daughter and her friends at the lake all last summer and he didn't seem disturbed or upset by it. They're kids regardless of what they're wearing. He didn't treat them any differently than when they were 9 and at the lake.
I don't honestly care what bathing suits they were wearing, but schools do pretty routinely say "one piece suits." That would have made more sense than telling them to put a shirt over their suits, which is weird, and was so clearly different from what boys were to wear.
The main issue here is that it isn't the job of girls or women to keep men from sexualizing them. Girls' bodies should not be policed to make men more comfortable. Especially adult men should be expected to be able to control themselves. Kids should wear the suits they find most comfortable, and the swimsuits I've seen for tweens are not that mature. At 12, my daughter wouldn't have fit in an adult bikini top. At 13 they are a bit more developed and this year I have to go to the junior's department to find clothes for my daughter, and we are having to work harder to find a suit she will be comfortable in. But I'm shopping to find a suit she'll be comfortable and be able to move around and play comfortably in. I am not shopping out of concern for the eyes of men or boys.
The mindset of this note in the OP is the same mindset that puts women in burqas or says women's arms and legs should be covered at all times regardless of the heat. Men who find girls in bathing suits attractive will also find girls in shorts and a t-shirt, or jeans, or whatever else attractive. How far should they go to keep men comfortable? That isn't the girls' responsibility. And bathing suits are perfectly appropriate for swimming pools, whether girls' bodies are developed or not.
TexasMommaWithAHat
(3,212 posts)And in my opinion, it's the culture and their mothers that are sexualizing young girls. I don't think you can't blame that on men.
Seriously, my kids were not dressed by "the church lady." That's not how I want to come across here. My kid was the cute 13 year old in the short skirt - just not the cute kid in the short, "sexy" skirt.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)define "short skirt" as sexy no matter what. I'm not sure what a non-sexy short skirt looks like. This sounds very subjective and questionable.
You could just as easily say, "My 13-year-old wears a bikini, but just a bikini, not a sexy bikini." It's in the eye of the beholder. One person sees a kid in a bathing suit, another person sees the same kid in the same bathing suit and sees "sexy." It's possible that none of us see our own kids as sexy and interpert them as just in a bathing suit but not a sexy one, or just in a short skirt but not in a sexy one, but other people might see them as the "sexualized" kid.
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)Why are women constantly expected to jump through hoops because so many men are perverts who had parents that never taught them to control themselves and act halfway decent? Women should not have to jump through hoops to satisfy men, one way or the other. There are plenty of men who aren't so juvenile and know how to control themselves. So, boys can, for a fact, be raised to become adult men instead of 14 year old boys in a man's body.
Placing the onus on women to dress a certain way to keep perverted men with no self control is no different than the extremists in the ME who force women to wear clothing to cover every part of their body except their eyes. People who claim that women who are showing any skin are somehow asking for it need to go take a look at the 12 year old LDS sister-wives who dress in clothing that covers almost every inch of their body and ask them how that somehow magically stops perverts. Obviously, it doesn't.
Something is wrong when women are expected to jump through hoops because some men were never raised to have any willpower or self control...or a healthy mentality when it comes to the difference between children and adults, at the very least. It says a lot about a man if he is uncomfortable around teenage girls wearing a swimsuit...and none of it is good. There is something extremely wrong in our culture when pedophiles make the rules and that seems to be what it happening with these types of rules.
ann---
(1,933 posts)modestly at a pool is NOT "jumping through hoops." It is
common decency.
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)It's a swimsuit for goodness sake. I actually feel bad for you that you'd even contemplate that a prepubescent child could be immodest and need to wear a freaking shirt at a swim party over their swimsuits.
ann---
(1,933 posts)The school is probably anticipating that SOME parents will
send their (some well developed) 6th grade daughters to the pool party in a swimsuit
or bikini that is inappropriate. I actually feel bad for those who
cannot see that decency is being advocated here by the school - not shaming. It
boggles my mind.
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)If the school was worried about bikinis then they could have simply said "no bikinis" or "one piece only". Parents are used to one piece only rules, not this body shaming bullshit. Wearing a shirt in a pool is uncomfortable and not the usual practice.
treestar
(82,383 posts)Even when I was a kid, bathing suits were fine for the pool. Even bikinis. And through teenhood. In 6th grade, there was no question.
And that was long ago.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)It is THEIR problem, they should be uncomfortable. The way to NOT deal properly is to make the child cover up.
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)There is something way wrong with a man who considers a 12 or 13 year old sexy. Period. There is no excuse for that.
ann---
(1,933 posts)administration realized that some parents WOULD allow their young
daughters to wear skimpy bikinis and that's why they required a cover shirt.
I'm so glad to find someone who also doesn't understand the mindset
that puts a twelve year old in a string bikini. I think the school was trying
to avoid the inevitable problems if parents did send their daughters to the party
dressed that way.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)control themselves?
Why can't men control themselves?
treestar
(82,383 posts)But at swim parties, even over 40 years ago when I was that age, nobody told us we had to do that. We'd wear our suits and carry a towel. For 2015, this seems a bit much for a pool party.
I recall when our junior high school had to ban halter tops at school because of one well endowed 7th grader. I have no problem with that limit. But when going swimming, bathing suits seem to me to be enough and ought to be enough. They should have required the shirts for the boys - for the non swimming part of the party, all of the kids could have been required to wear shirts.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)boys have nipples and their chests can inspire lustful thoughts also.
TransitJohn
(6,932 posts)I don't think many appreciate your censoring prudery. There are plenty of sites on the web you can go to if you don't like the community here.
ann---
(1,933 posts)I didn't say I was "pope" of anything. I was expressing my
distaste for the vulgarity that is so blatant in many of the
threads on this forum. That doesn't make me any less of a
liberal than you or anyone else.
I think vulgarity is disrespectful and most of all - unnecessary.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)Stargazer09
(2,131 posts)Most sixth grade girls I know wouldn't be "immodest" in the first place, so the whole t-shirt requirement was just focused on body-shaming the girls.
laundry_queen
(8,646 posts)alphafemale
(18,497 posts)Grow up and pop your sanctimonious head out of your ass.
It's a beautiful day and you'll see it and the smell will be much better.
ann---
(1,933 posts)uppityperson
(115,674 posts)to the fucking people who fucking use it every fucking day it is in no fucking way fucking vulgar.
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)lol.
whathehell
(28,969 posts)A little honesty, please.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)"A little honesty, please. "
whathehell
(28,969 posts)Yeah, and back at ya.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)whathehell
(28,969 posts)Cal Carpenter
(4,959 posts)like you continue to do. Your obsession with the bodies of kids swimming in swimsuits and your judgmental attitudes about this make me really wonder what goes on in YOUR head. Because you seem to be projecting all sorts of perversity onto young kids.
You come across creepy as hell, to be honest.
Swimming in a swimsuit is improper? FFS.
Response to ann--- (Reply #45)
Name removed Message auto-removed
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)protested. They said t-shirts were optional for all?
Reading. It's good.
6th grade girls should be taught modesty? That's totally fucked up.
Swim suits cover what needs to be covered.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)Also, question, what does self respect have to do with not being a rape victim?
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026595616#post102
On top of all that, what do you think is going to happen?
ann---
(1,933 posts)I have a stalker?
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)treestar
(82,383 posts)and trying to drive someone off the board over a disagreement.
People might still be liberals if they think sex is for adults. As long as that applies to both sexes.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)and they don't need to be covered up.
It is interesting how few people on this thread seem to have read the linked story. The school changed their tune, said t-shirts are optional and for both sexes. Not just girls.
I see that poster as missing the "As long as that applies to both sexes" and creepy that the focus is on feeling sexual towards a 12 year old girl in a swim suit while trying to make the 12 year old girl responsible for other's issues.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)is categorically no different than demanding women wear burkas, because its THEM who are making it about sex, under the veneer of "modesty", not us feminists.
trumad
(41,692 posts)Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)wearing certain clothing inviting rape.
Your attitudes about women are completely fucked up.
I hope you really don't have a daughter. I feel sorry for her if she exists.
ann---
(1,933 posts)said any such thing.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)"but it might make a girl have some self-respect and
maybe she won't get drunk and be the object of
some rapist who would take advantage of her."
ann---
(1,933 posts)anything about what she is wearing - it DOESN'T.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)It's the same kind of misogyny, just ramped up to college age.
ann---
(1,933 posts)I never said or implied any such thing. I'm really done
with this thread. It is unbelievable to me how words get
twisted simply because of lack of reading comprehension.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)"but it might make a girl have some self-respect and
maybe she won't get drunk and be the object of
some rapist who would take advantage of her."
ann---
(1,933 posts)what she is wearing? I never said any such thing.
I said I agree with whoever created that poster which
reminds girls not to get drunk "and be the object of
some rapist who would take advantage of her."
That blames the RAPIST who would take advantage of her - not
the girl.
Something seriously wrong with people who cannot
understand that. Bye - I'm done with this thread.
Sometimes I can see why people think liberals are
way "out there."
Even liberals like me have ethics and morals - whether you
think that is wrong I don't care.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)ann---
(1,933 posts)It is the administration trying to teach modesty to children.
Modesty is moral and ethical.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)gollygee
(22,336 posts)wearing a swimming suit to a swimming pool would be immoral and unethical. Which it isn't.
Egnever
(21,506 posts)It happens here constantly here. It is people looking to be righteous on the Internet.... Even if they have to make shit up to do so.
JTFrog
(14,274 posts)MineralMan
(146,192 posts)pretty silly, and people are challenging you on it. DU is a PUBLIC forum. If you post anything here, you should expect other DUers to comment on it. If you post misogynistic stuff, you'll certainly get comments. Forcing 12 year old girls to wear t-shirts to cover up their breasts is just stupid. Beginning in puberty, girls' breasts begin to enlarge. It's a completely natural thing to happen. Shaming them for simply growing up is exceedingly stupid. Instead, boys should be educated in the basic fundamentals of human development. Breasts develop so infants can be fed, not so boys will get erections. That's what we need to teach, not that girls' breasts are somehow shameful and should be covered up or camouflaged.
These days, many girls begin puberty at 10 years of age or even younger. That's a fact. Should they be ashamed of growing up? I don't think so.
whathehell
(28,969 posts)He did the same to me on an entirely different subject.
MineralMan
(146,192 posts)Kids swimming and diving into the pool. Splashing wars. Lots of loud yelling and squealing. Most sixth grade boys haven't even begun puberty yet, so they're not interested too much in girls, although they might look at them, wondering what the big deal was.
Worrying about what bathing suits 12 year olds wear seems over the top. Most will wear rather modest ones, because they're new and shy about their body changes.
Uff da! T-shirts, indeed!
jeff47
(26,549 posts)Response to ann--- (Reply #1)
winter is coming This message was self-deleted by its author.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)Yes, that's shaming. Modesty is wearing a swimming suit at the pool that provides adequate coverage. Having to wear a shirt over it would be uncomfortable make it more difficult to swim. There's nothing safety related here. Your whole post is absolutely ridiculous.
pnwmom
(108,925 posts)That would be treating them equally.
Logical
(22,457 posts)Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)to me, lower in the thread.
No one can be that stupid, can they?
awoke_in_2003
(34,582 posts)The first thing that grabbed her was my hairy chest. I think it had something to do with her teenage crush- Tom Selleck
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)Have you ever been to a public pool?
Why is it the girls' responsibility to cover up and be "modest"? Why should they be ashamed of their bodies? Because a boy could get a boner? Jesus fucking Christ.
This is just so fucking over-the-top retro sexist I'm speechless.
abelenkpe
(9,933 posts)DU has become rancid.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)for the possible arousal of men?
GoneOffShore
(17,309 posts)You nailed it.
underahedgerow
(1,232 posts)dresses to the Inauguration?
Same thing. My goodness, bathing suits in a swimming pool! We could go all Burkini if you like! That's right, hide the girls from the boys, so they end up like the nutjobs in ISIS. Those freaks are SOOO sexually repressed they get turned on by adolescent females and throw potentially gay people from tall buildings to their deaths.
The whole point of women covering themselves in the muslim cultures is to protect them from the lusts of men. Hey, look how well THAT turned out!
(yes, I know, modesty in the eyes of their gods, blah blah blah, but if we break it down to the bottom line, it's because men fear their own reactions around females in these repressed, backwards and un-evolved cultures, discuss at great length...)
Go ahead, name a culture that has suppressed the sexuality of their males and females to any benefit, at all, whatsoever!
You'll absolutely find that cultures with a healthy, normal regard for the human body are far more advanced socially, psychologically and emotionally. Talking openly about SEX, our bodies, where babies come from and our responsibilities for our bodies from an early age is the key to growth and healthy psychological well being.
Matariki
(18,775 posts)we can do it
(12,118 posts)alphafemale
(18,497 posts)Stargazer09
(2,131 posts)Telling the girls to wear t-shirts, while the boys go bare-chested, is definitely shaming the girls. It's too bad you can't understand that.
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)all were mature enough to handle it a tons better than some adults i am reading in this thread.
fuckin 10 and 11 yr old girls. fuck that.
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)I'm very fair skinned and in younger years sometimes I would wear a shirt to swim. Getting a break from the gallon of sun block needed wasn't worth it. Ugh.
BTW, as a day care kid we went to the pool every Tuesday & Thursday all summer long.
Orrex
(63,086 posts)LadyHawkAZ
(6,199 posts)Nothing is quite so important to a developing girl as modesty. Next thing you know they'll be thinking they can swim too, and then where will we all be?
JTFrog
(14,274 posts)And your post is shameful.
I'm floored that you are stubbornly ignoring ALL of the feedback you are getting on this.
"And, if it's really a SWIMMING party"
Well, what did you think it really was?
Your post is incredibly disturbing and I have to agree with others that this doesn't seem to be the site for you.
PersonNumber503602
(1,134 posts)Subtle satire mocking such attitudes?
If not, as with most others who have replied, I'm curious what you believe will happen.
Also, who decides what is modest? I don't find two piece swimsuits immodest. Should they be forced to wear burqas? Not very practical for swimming, but there won't be any room for claims of immodesty.
GoneOffShore
(17,309 posts)Little kids, OH THE HORROR, swimming NEKKID!111!!!!
And safer in what respect? Of your sensibilities?
Yes modesty and safety and the key words. All the sexists will be coming out of the woodwork, along with all the pervs.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)roody
(10,849 posts)snooper2
(30,151 posts)virgogal
(10,178 posts)Years ago my kids all wore them.
rocktivity
(44,555 posts)virgogal
(10,178 posts)In_The_Wind
(72,300 posts)Dont call me Shirley
(10,998 posts)Speedos makes swimsuits for girls too. So no one can wear a Speedos brand suit.
Speedos should file a suit with ISDS over loss of profit by the school district
demmiblue
(36,751 posts)I remember loving the cut and the colors (not to mention that they were very well made).
Don't ask me about my brief Body Glove phase!
Dont call me Shirley
(10,998 posts)Oh, nevermind!
cwydro
(51,308 posts)and everyone wore speedos.
America is obsessed with sex.
WinkyDink
(51,311 posts)girls' attire. J/S/.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)I can't see where junior girls swimsuits have gotten any more "strippery".
I either go to the wrong beaches and pools, or I am going to the wrong strip joints, because I've never gotten confused about where I was.
Maedhros
(10,007 posts)Most of the suits were one-piece, none were outlandish.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)and their swimsuits are not stripperish. I'd have to go to a store that sells swimsuits for adults to find something like you're thinking of, and it wouldn't fit most 12-year-olds.
ileus
(15,396 posts)A HERETIC I AM
(24,321 posts)Hard ones, anyway.
AND NO SEX, EITHER!!
Damned kids, always sexing up the sexy sex stuff.
B2G
(9,766 posts)bluestateguy
(44,173 posts)nt
ann---
(1,933 posts)Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)what is the point of your post?
ann---
(1,933 posts)girls "turned on" by a bare-chested boy? How ridiculous.
Humanist_Activist
(7,670 posts)Seriously, have you ever talked to girls or women before about what they like?
ON EDIT: Actually, come to think of it, have you ever looked at the fandoms for a lot of shows on The CW? Most of them are eye candy for girls and gay men, not straight guys and lesbians. And yes, bare chests are not unusual.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)What? Yes, girls that age are "turned on" by boys their age without shirts. Young hormones. You must not have had daughters?
ann---
(1,933 posts)a boy going bare chested is the same thing as a girl going
bare chested - or almost bare chested in a bikini?
I am a female and seeing bare-chested men at a pool or the beach
is a common sight and not inappropriate (or sexual) at all - in that setting.
I just don't understand the comparison. 6th grade girls should respect
their bodies enough to make sure they can have a good time swimming
at a pool party - even if it means wearing a t-shirt as a cover up afterwards.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)Seeing girls in bathing suits is also a common sight and not inappropriate (or sexual) when swimming, the same as when men and boys wear swimming suits.
You're saying that if they wear swimming suits to a pool, they aren't respecting their bodies. Do you not see how messed up that is? Do you have some kind of history or problem that leads to your views here? Because this just plain isn't normal.
ann---
(1,933 posts)I NEVER said that wearing swimming suits to a pool isn't respecting their bodies.
That is what people who can't read are gleaning from what I am saying.
I am saying that the administration is trying to PREVENT a young girl being
seen in inappropriate bathing suit which the parent might allow her to wear.
Instead of telling the parents what kind of suit the girls SHOULD wear, they
are simply asking they be covered up with a t-shirt - that's the way I see it.
Personally, I think it isn't normal for a parent to whine to a school about the
rules of proper dress at a pool party. I don't have a problem with parents
allowing their kids to wear whatever they allow them to wear at a PUBLIC
pool. This is a SCHOOL party, isn't it? So they make the rules - period. There is
nothing wrong with it - in my view.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)better for girls than being in a swimsuit that you might find inappropriate? If the parent is OK with it, why would you even care?
The schools are public institutions and are responsible to the taxpayers just like any public institution.
treestar
(82,383 posts)something to cover up without saying the same to the boys.
They all start even with the swim suit, perfectly appropriate for the pool. Then next comes the cover up requirement. Apply it to both sexes and it makes sense. Apply it to just the girls and you tell the girls they need covering up and the boys don't.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)laundry_queen
(8,646 posts)and for you not to think so is sexist.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)look around you.
Matariki
(18,775 posts)riderinthestorm
(23,272 posts)Lets just say there ARE any horny elementary school age kids, then by your assumptions both the boys AND girls should be covered up...
Yet only the girls are asked to cover.
That's body shaming the girls.
Either both sexes have reached the "horny" stage and should be covered, or not.
Or even more logically, this is a swimming pool and swim suits will be worn. Get over it
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)procon
(15,805 posts)with everyone wearing the required t-shirts, with giant, nekked boobies and pert nipples painted on the front!
this is a prime example of why the school administrators try to avoid
such things at a pool party.
procon
(15,805 posts)Get over it. Stop shaming girls just because the men in our culture have been taught to look at them as sex objects. Raise the bar.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)where they're already feeling uncomfortable with their developing bodies. This kind of shame-based message is really hurtful.
ann---
(1,933 posts)I'm saying I agree with the school that 6th grade girls
can be told how to dress at a pool party - even if the
parents don't like it.
Nothing wrong with being modest. Unless you're saying that
wanting a girl to dress modestly is "shaming" her. Ridiculous
twisting of intent.
gollygee
(22,336 posts)at a pool is shaming her. It's making her feel that her body in a swimsuit is immodest when the boys' bodies in swimsuits aren't considered immodest. That is shaming.
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)If the way they dress is ok with them, and their parents, what right do you have to try and make them feel ashamed for not living up to your version of "modestly"?
procon
(15,805 posts)You are saying that girls with boobs are so embarrassingly different or deformed that they should not even be seen in public unless their bodies are shrouded from view. That sexist attitude would make any girl feel self conscious and ashamed. You're telling them they must hide their natural and normal bodies because those nippley bits are somehow so offensive that extra steps must be taken to ensure they are hidden, swaddled and covered up least someone become outraged, swoon, or become uncontrollably aroused if they catch a glimpse the human breast.
Can you describe what "modesty" looks like? Are we going back to the 1890s, maybe a burqa, and if a t-shirt is fitting swim attire, what about adding pantaloons... better yet just stop sexualizing women and girls.
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)is not inappropriate, sexist and misogynistic. If a person wants to go topless they should be able to if they are comfortable with that so long as others are allowed to be topless. Why the different rules for males and females at all?
Isn't forcing girls to wear tops of ANY kind while allowing boys to not wear tops also sexist/misogynistic, just to a lesser extent?
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)with girls bodies.
Rex
(65,616 posts)Good citizenship? What fresh hell did that come from?
Whiskeytide
(4,459 posts)... at the party?
This is ridiculous. It's a pool party. This works to shame the girls, AND sends the message to the boys that they're not responsible for controlling their own urges. It's the same mentality that says boys will be boys.
And, her mother and I will teach our 6th grade daughter the concept of modesty. I don't need school officials telling her that there's something wrong with her body.
pnwmom
(108,925 posts)deathrind
(1,786 posts)Boys don't have to wear shirts why should girls have too...
/facepalm
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)Males and females both have nipples so o difference there so either the boys have to wear tops like the girls or neither boys nor girls should have to wear tops. There is no functional reason (for many) of the girls to have to wear tops. Not wearing a top does not make (many/any) of the girls go crazy and attack the boys so the girls not wearing a top should have a similar effects. Even IF the effects are not similar and the boys DO attack the girls not wearing tops, would saying that women have to wear tops at the pool be victim blaming?
I guess my question is why do the girls have to wear tops at all if the boys don't have to? Why can't they all go bare chested if that is comfortable to them?
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)There are cultures where everyone goes bare chested and ones where women are burqa'd. Why?
laundry_queen
(8,646 posts)abelenkpe
(9,933 posts)My kids wear speedos. They're on swim team. Son wears jammers, daughter wears a one peice. There's nothing inappropriate about them. Perhaps the administrators are the ones with the dirty mind.
eta:
T-shirt over a swimsuit? If they're not requiring the same from boys it is a message that the girls should be ashamed and made to cover up. Why not tell them to wear a burka and hide all that sinful flesh?
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)spending all my youth in a speedo, with guys in speedo, a much more healthy environment in nonchalance. there was no big deal with it. among the adults or the kids.
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)That is how I got the graduation dress code for women changed at RCC, the community college I went to at that time. They had a stipulation that women had to wear dresses and could not wear pant suits. There was no requirement that men must wear dresses too. That is giving women one set of rules and men another. I pointed out the Title IX violation to everyone in the administration and asked the ACLU about it. The ACLU sent a letter to them for me and they changed the dress code. Before that, they were sticking to their guns. The ACLU made them change their mind quite quickly.
When they announced the change, the women gave a standing ovation. I had no idea anyone else would appreciate the change as much as I did until I saw that. I was amazed, to be honest. I thought I would be the only one to complain about the policy.
My major at that time was Electrical/Electronics Technology. I had to crawl around on the floor and wire 600 Volt electrical circuits and wire transformers and wallow in the dust and dirt to pull wire and all of the other stuff just like the guys did. I'd like to see any of the administration at that college do THAT in a dress. The guys stood with me on that too. They said they sure wouldn't want to try it in a dress, lol. There was one other girl in the class, but she didn't seem all hell to interested in changing the policy. She said she would not march at graduation and just wanted the diploma. She didn't want to wear a dress either. Trust me, the two of us would have looked like Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari from Bosom Buddies if we had worn dresses.
Most women ended up wearing pants suits to graduation. I later got a Computer Engineering degree and still wore a pants suit to that graduation too. They didn't change the policy back once they finally changed it.
Any time they have a different set of rules for women or girls than they do for men or boys, it is a Title IX violation.
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)violation of Title IX?
Isn't forcing girls to wear tops of ANY kind while allowing boys to not wear tops also sexist/misogynistic, just to a lesser extent than a t-shirt (or a burka for that matter)?
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)That would settle it, actually.
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)if you thought allowing males to be topless while forcing females to wear tops (of any kind) would be a violation of Title IX? As someone who has experience in similar matters I would like to hear your opinion.
(I am not asking if you approve of females going topless or think it is a good idea, just if you think they should have the right to if makes can)
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)t-shirts optional after the mom said she was contacting the meia.
kelly1mm
(4,719 posts)and:
But hey, they are wearing non-white t-shirts!
Blue_Tires
(55,445 posts)DawgHouse
(4,019 posts)Response to demmiblue (Original post)
Post removed
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)uppityperson
(115,674 posts)fizzgig
(24,146 posts)tabasco
(22,974 posts)We all must OBEY!
liberal_at_heart
(12,081 posts)an older generation. I think I remember a poll once that gauged the age of DUers and most were older. It shows. The older generation was brought up being taught that girls' bodies are sexual and shameful. Maybe people who feel uncomfortable around teenage girls in swimsuits should do more to control their own thoughts instead of trying to make themselves feel better by controlling what young women are or are not allowed to wear.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)Christianity, Judaism, Islam. The world would be a much better place if those dumbass mythologies all fizzled out.
demmiblue
(36,751 posts)A couple of them were obvious from day 1.
Now, the MRA faction, that is a whole different story.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)... and give the mom her due credit. A very few felt the need to post their sexist/ misogynistic views over and over.
demmiblue
(36,751 posts)Teachers get enough shite!
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)... as the vast majority of DUers are capable of evolved and informed thinking ... and I messed up
demmiblue
(36,751 posts)- to one proud member of the vast majority to another!
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)It was an important distinction ... I try very hard to admit mistakes, correct when I can and move on (its a "me" thing, nothing you said was chastising , rude or anything else).
Hoping you are having a nice holiday weekend
LostOne4Ever
(9,267 posts)[font style="font-family:'Georgia','Baskerville Old Face','Helvetica',fantasy;" size=4 color=teal]That a school would do something like this in this day and age....
Or the fact that there are people here on DU actually agreeing with the school. Seriously?
Kickass mom standing up against sexist dress code deserves our support![/font]
Sen. Walter Sobchak
(8,692 posts)If this is a "contours" issue, it seems it is being applied equally.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)... the girls/ women's versions are particularly covering and not prone to failure .... further proof the administrator that wrote this is an imbecile.
Sen. Walter Sobchak
(8,692 posts)999/1000 people will get it with no further explanation required.
Like most things on DU, the glaringly obvious intent is only misunderstood by people actively seeking to.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)Just because something is conjured in your mind does not make it so
Sen. Walter Sobchak
(8,692 posts)Any misunderstanding of the colloquial use of the phrase is your own rhetorical invention. That applies equally to most DU nit-picking.
etherealtruth
(22,165 posts)If not intentional, it still gave me a good laugh ... I needed that.
Thank you!
uppityperson
(115,674 posts)They said t-shirts were optional for boys and girls.
gwheezie
(3,580 posts)It was very confusing. I doubt I would have worn a bathing suit at all. I spent a few years not going to the beach because I felt like a freak There were a few of us girls with our tiny breasts and we were teased constantly. I hope as a culture we've come further. I would not want to shame girls by singling them out.
roody
(10,849 posts)so they don't get sunburned. Required of ALL.
polly7
(20,582 posts)We used to line up by the dozen at the diving board and do our best cannonballs and flips, I can't count the number of times we'd lose our tops or bottoms. It was funny and slightly embarrassing, but I don't remember any rapes happening, thank goodness.
We'd all lay around in the sun and nobody ever cared about who was wearing what.
I'm glad this woman is speaking up too, good for her.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)polly7
(20,582 posts)We had great teachers in those grades, they didn't stress over things that weren't harmful. I loved my teachers and gained so much from them in those years, when I see some of them now it's like seeing a long lost friend - it was a small school, so maybe they had more opportunity to connect with us all. Learning was fun - and so were those pool parties!
Syzygy321
(583 posts)I can think of acceptable reasons for this rule. Like, maybe the teacher knows there is a shy or chubby or Muslim girl in the class who will want to wear a T shirt, and the teacher didn't want her to stick out like a sore thumb and be mocked.
OK I know it's a stretch. And in that case the rule should have been for all the students.
On the Muslim side of my family, the dad does order his daughters to wear shorts and sometimes tahirts over their swimsuits. But he prob wouldn't let them go to a mixed pool party in the first place.
reinventingcory
(1 post)I love that the first thing the OP had to do to justify the manufactured outrage, is dismiss the "no speedo" rule for boys....