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Fri May 22, 2015, 12:57 PM

Mom Fights School Policy That Says Girls “Must” Wear T-Shirts at Pool

Source: Babble



When your child brings home a form from school for you to sign, do you gloss over it, mindlessly scribble your signature, and go about your business? I don’t know about you, but I’m guilty as charged.

Jennifer Smith is different. The Indiana mom is proclaiming victory after flagging something in her son’s school permission slip she felt could ultimately prove harmful to elementary school girls — a dress code requirement for a sixth-grade pool party. The form, a picture of which Smith posted to a Facebook feminist group, included a stipulation that all girls wear non-white T-shirts over their swimsuits. No similar requirement was targeted at boys, unless you count a “No Speedos” rule.

It’s just the latest in a recent string of stories about parents or students being outraged over dress codes for female pupils. But Smith’s experience could prove encouraging for anyone disturbed by apparent gender inequality in school dress codes — Smith’s complaints brought about change within days and she didn’t even have to stage protests to make it happen.

<snip>

But Smith fired back with academic research to justify her concerns. She wrote:

… I am not sure if you are aware of the emotional hardship that is caused by [telling] young girls their bodies are inappropriate and must be covered. According to Siegel (1999), “negative feelings about their bodies account for the higher prevalence of depressive symptomatology and lower self-esteem among girls” (p.163). As you are aware adolescence is a very confusing time and can also be detrimental to girl’s emotional wellbeing. Setting one standard for half of the student body only promotes the idea that girls bodies are naturally shameful, and helps to send a very damaging message of “you are reasonable for others thoughts, feelings, and actions” that they will carry with them for the rest of their lives.


Read more: http://www.babble.com/parenting/mom-fights-school-policy-that-says-girls-must-wear-t-shirts-at-pool/


As a parent of a son, she took it upon herself to speak up for the girls in her son's class/grade. What a great role model for all the children involved. That is one kick-ass woman!

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Reply Mom Fights School Policy That Says Girls “Must” Wear T-Shirts at Pool (Original post)
demmiblue May 2015 OP
ann--- May 2015 #1
jberryhill May 2015 #4
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treestar May 2015 #207
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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:03 PM

1. I agree with it

 

Can you imagine what happens if the girls were allowed to wear
bikinis - or low cut tops - at a school pool party? And, if it's really
a SWIMMING party - it's much safer to wear a one piece or have
a tee shirt on to cover over it.

Sixth grade girls should be taught modesty - it's NOT shaming.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:11 PM

4. Imagine what happens?

 

Umm... I'm trying to imagine what happens.

They are able to swim?

I pretty much spent most summers between the age of 7 and 14 on a swim team. We had plenty of parties with a large mixed group of that age range wearing all sorts of swimsuits, mostly speedos, and I can't remember anything drastic happening.

What is it that happens? I must have missed it.

What pool allows anyone to wear shirts in the water?

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #4)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:43 PM

20. You know what happens!

Satan comes out of the pool drains and turns the boys into rape-y monsters with no self control and it is all the girls' fault. For being human girls. Because boys will be boys, which means they are half a second from being rape-y at all times.

Or something.

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Response to Cal Carpenter (Reply #20)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:55 PM

207. Thread win

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #4)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:09 AM

65. I thought competitive women swimmers wear one piece swim suits because...

I thought competitive women swimmers wear one piece swim suits because of the danger of the top coming off on a two piece swim suit.


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Response to DemocratSinceBirth (Reply #65)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:19 PM

183. They wear whatever helps streamline their swimming

 

In time... Most are wearing almost
A running suit looking item.

A pool party is completely different and if the school is so worried about being able to chaperone, then don't host the party

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #4)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:57 PM

255. It's a saftey issue.

 

These kids are not adults. You dress them down and pretty much the perverted little boys come out of the woodwork. 11 year old boys don't need much encouragement.

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Response to PRB (Reply #255)

Mon May 25, 2015, 03:12 PM

263. No it isn't, these kids are not going to be unsupervised, and again, why should the girls...

 

have to cover up, and not the boys?

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #263)

Thu May 28, 2015, 03:16 PM

266. The boys are coverd up.

 

It's a safety issue for the girls. You can almost never have too much supervision.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:12 PM

5. No. Boys should be taught to be non-predatory toward girls.

 

Boys and girls should be allowed to wear whatever they want. What do you think will happen at a public swim party?
[hr][font color="blue"][center]Birds are territorial creatures.
The lyrics to the songbird's melodious trill go something like this:
"Stay out of my territory or I'll PECK YOUR GODDAMNED EYES OUT!"
[/center][/font][hr]

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Response to randome (Reply #5)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:15 PM

6. I apparently missed out on whatever it is for years

 


What on earth happens?

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #6)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:25 PM

12. Must be one of those 'wink, wink, nudge, nudge' things.

 

Or is it 'nudge, nudge, wink, wink'? I'M SO CONFUSED!
[hr][font color="blue"][center]Birds are territorial creatures.
The lyrics to the songbird's melodious trill go something like this:
"Stay out of my territory or I'll PECK YOUR GODDAMNED EYES OUT!"
[/center][/font][hr]

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Response to randome (Reply #12)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:19 PM

212. say no more

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #6)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:42 PM

19. Why, it's SEX, of course.

Lots and lots of sexy, sexy sex.

Lots of it.

Tons in fact.

The hormones spill out onto the street.

They have to call the pool guy in to clean the flters extra good.


ITS SEX, I SAY! Horrible, horrible dirty, naughty, screaming till the cops come sexy ssex, dammit.

And not a moment too soon, ether.

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Response to A HERETIC I AM (Reply #19)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:08 PM

24. Apparently, I went to the wrong 6th grade pool parties

 


We swam, dove, listened to music, played various water games, ate pizza, and got bit by mosquitos.

Either my attention was distracted during all of the sex, or I just didn't go to the right parties.

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #24)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:15 PM

26. You and me both.

I was on a swim team in Maryland in the late 60's/early 70's.

Girls and boys, speedos and all.

The naughtiest thing I ever saw was me, swiping Raspberries that stuck through the fence of a house I passed on the way home from early morning practice.

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Response to A HERETIC I AM (Reply #26)

Fri May 22, 2015, 07:25 PM

49. Same here. Mid- to late-'70s.

It's a wonder I managed to become a productive member of society what with all the exposed flesh. Tennis skirts, midriffs, peanut pants, short shorts... tsk.

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Response to WorseBeforeBetter (Reply #49)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:21 PM

214. Me too.

The halter tops too. I even wore them. Yet retained my virginity past the 8th grade. How strange.

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Response to treestar (Reply #214)

Sun May 24, 2015, 05:17 PM

233. Oh, right, halter tops!

Tube tops, too. Tube tops, tight jeans and Bear Traps... now *that* was a look.

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Response to WorseBeforeBetter (Reply #233)

Sun May 24, 2015, 06:34 PM

238. hip hugger pants

so low that you had to wear a body suit (top that snapped under your groin) rather than just a top/blouse. And flared out as wide as possible, or as wide as it ever got in the 70s. You had to have a belt to keep them up.

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Response to treestar (Reply #238)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:15 PM

251. Bwahaha... I forgot about bodysuits and those damn snaps.

Skin-tight maroon bodysuit, low-rise tan cords, and Wallabees, circa 1974 or so. Oh, yeah.

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Response to WorseBeforeBetter (Reply #251)


Response to jberryhill (Reply #6)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:51 PM

30. boners for 10, Alex?

 

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Response to elehhhhna (Reply #30)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:55 PM

32. They happen anyway

 

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #32)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:59 PM

34. Shit, at that age, boners are random. n/t

 

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #34)

Fri May 22, 2015, 03:01 PM

35. Yep

 


Getting up from your desk at school and doing that "front book carry" thing.

On the swim team, jumping back in the cold water was always a good idea.

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #35)

Fri May 22, 2015, 03:05 PM

36. LOL, yeah...

 

I always wore loose fit(not necessarily baggy) jeans for a reason. I see these guys in skinny jeans and I just think about how much pain I would have been in when one of my random, and sometimes not so random stiffies occur.

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #6)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:18 PM

211. Why did you not get your share of what happens?

I call shenanigans!

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Response to treestar (Reply #211)

Sun May 24, 2015, 06:07 PM

237. None of that happened at a pool party

 


...and not in sixth grade.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:26 PM

14. "Sixth grade girls should be taught modesty..."

 

Am I reading what I am reading on DU??

I went to a school sponsored boy/girl pool party when I was around 12. Since it was the early 70s we all wore bikinis. Every single girl. Mine was a ice blue velvet with side cutouts on the bottoms.

Oh, did I mention I went to a Catholic school?

Even with a bunch of half-naked, wet teen girls all around them the boys in my class were far more interested in doing cannon ball and "nut cracker" dives off the diving board than in us.

Here, this site might be a better fit for you --

http://www.covenanteyes.com/2013/08/16/biblical-definition-of-modesty/

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:32 PM

16. Disgusting.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:39 PM

17. It is SHAMING

One does not penalize one gender because they are afraid another gender will act poorly.

if one is claiming worry about sun exposure .... do they not care about the boys ...?

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #17)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:37 PM

139. It's not necessarily about the reaction of the opposite sex

It's about the couple of over sexualized girls who will inevitably show up in an itty, bitty string bikini.



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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #139)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:43 PM

140. You are talking about preteens, FFS!

The only people who seem to be sexualizing them are you and ann. Says a lot about your thinking process.

Gross.

(And I bet, dollars to donuts, that neither of you are women)

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #139)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:47 PM

142. Oh for the love of pete ... you are serious, aren't you?

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #139)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:49 PM

143. You're making assumptions

They just want to wear what is in fashion. It isn't an issue of them being sexualized, it's an issue of small bathing suits being fashionable. The fashions are a result of women and girls being sexualized, but it isn't fair to assume that those specific girls are over sexualized.

But most 12-year-olds are still shopping in kid/tween shops or departments, and you don't see particularly immodest bathing suits there. Those shops/departments go up to size kids 16, and most kids aren't in sizes bigger than that until 13 or later. My 13-year-old has just moved into adult sizes and only because she's unusually tall, so she's moved into them earlier than most of her friends.

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #139)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:42 PM

149. Then why wouldn't the school just say no bikinis? n/t

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #17)

Sat May 23, 2015, 07:40 PM

158. I suppose then that you would agree that the girls could go topless just like the boys then,

assuming the female was comfortable with it of course.

When you get down to it, forcing one gender to wear an article of clothing of any kind (bikini top/t-shirt/burka) while allowing another gender to not wear anything at all is sexist/misogynistic, just to different degrees

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #158)

Sat May 23, 2015, 07:47 PM

159. Oh, you poor soul

This is clearly very difficult for you to follow.

I am sorry

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #159)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:01 PM

160. Actually I am serious. Treating males and females differently in an educational setting

is possibly a violation of Title IX.

There are many places that allow topless/nude swimming/sunbathing, both here in the US and overseas.

If you think it is OK to MANDATE that a female wear certain articles of clothing while making it OPTIONAL for men to wear those same articles, could you please explain why?

This may seem silly to you but I am trying to discern why it seems to be OK to mandate some type of top (bikini/one-piece/t-shirt/burka) for females and not for males.

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #160)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:19 PM

162. I actually think it is a violation pertaining to equal rights

Google Gwen Jacobs; Guelph, Ontario

Women continue to dress as they choose in Ontario (I have spent much time in Ontario and have not seen any women choose to be topless, but that is irrelevant), the idea is that the mere exposure of one's breasts is not viewed as inherently indecent. Ontario's court decisions were based on the idea that there cannot be separate requirements for the way women dress (vs men)

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #162)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:33 PM

164. THANK YOU for the link! I think that making tops (and type of top) optional for all, not

just males is the only intellectually consistent argument and one in keeping with equal rights/equal protection.

Those saying it is OK to MANDATE females wear clothing that males do not have to wear in identical situations are wrong. I find it hard to imagine why it would be OK to mandate bikini tops but not burkas. Once you allow the non-equal treatment then it is only a matter of degree, not principle.

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #164)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:39 PM

166. I apologize for my initial response ...

... for whatever reason (attributable to me) i though you were arguing that it was correct to demand that women dress in specific ways to prevent provoking a sexual response in others.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:41 PM

18. Tell me what YOU imagine wold happen.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:47 PM

22. I don't believe I just fucking read that on DU....

 

.....back to the 18th century with you....

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Response to truebrit71 (Reply #22)

Fri May 22, 2015, 06:59 PM

45. And

 

I cannot believe the vulgarity I read on DU. Is there something
wrong with modesty and decent language? Or you think just
because liberals post here everyone has the same ideas on
what is proper for young girls?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Fri May 22, 2015, 07:23 PM

48. Why just young girls? n/t

 

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Fri May 22, 2015, 09:17 PM

51. ann...ann...ann....

 

Maybe this isn't the place for you.

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Response to trumad (Reply #51)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:07 PM

174. I think you're right

 

DU has become a bottomless pit where "anything goes" should be the standard in this
country. Never thought an innocent remark on the side of modesty would bring out
such hatred in DU'ers for those who have a different opinion.

Since when is modesty wrong?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #174)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:12 PM

175. modesty is wrong when you try and preach it.

 

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Response to trumad (Reply #175)

Sun May 24, 2015, 12:11 PM

192. Modesty is never wrong

 

I am not preaching - I am giving my opinion.

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Response to trumad (Reply #175)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:22 PM

215. She only gave her opinion.

I disagree with her, but I cannot understand why you would attack her.

DISCUSSION BOARD, right???


Sometimes I think folks here just want an echo chamber of their own views.

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Response to cwydro (Reply #215)

Sun May 24, 2015, 09:56 PM

244. It's a pretty stupid opinion.

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Response to GoneOffShore (Reply #244)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:01 PM

245. So what?

We gotta gang up and have a pile on for that reason?

I don't agree with her, but I just have to laugh when DU turns into bully central...

Hypocrites...And it is always the same posters who show up for a pile on.

Funny. And revealing.

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Response to cwydro (Reply #245)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:06 PM

247. Stupid opinions - which don't have the same weight as opinions informed by facts,

Should be pointed at and laughed at.

"Oh, it's just my opinion.... on global warming, gay marriage, abortion, creationism, vaccinations, chemtrails, et. al"

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Response to GoneOffShore (Reply #247)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:10 PM

248. Oh ok.

As long as you consider an opinion stupid...well, that is all good.

You do realize that this is a discussion board, right? That means others get to express their opinions? Right?

Or do you prefer an echo chamber of your own views? I'm thinking yes.

I don't agree with Ann, but I cannot believe the pile-on/bullying on this site by supposed "progressives".

Sheesh.

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Response to cwydro (Reply #248)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:28 PM

249. Ann is being remarkably dense.

No, I don't prefer an echo chamber.

Informed, fact based opinions are worth discussing. Ones that aren't deserve laughter and ridicule.

Ann's fit into the latter.

And she is looking for the right to not be offended.

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Response to cwydro (Reply #248)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:32 PM

252. Are you saying only a certain number of people should be able to reply on a topic?

I am not sure what you are getting at since while you say "You do realize that this is a discussion board, right? That means others get to express their opinions?" you also seem to be chiding others for expressing their opinions. So we can discuss, but if we reply to someone that is...bad?

"others get to express their opinions" but others expressing their opinions is wrong?


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Response to ann--- (Reply #174)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:15 PM

199. It's not an 'innocent remark on the side of modesty' - it's SEXIST and deserves criticism

One policy for girls and a different one for boys isn't 'modesty' - it's shaming girls about their bodies.

And also, this isn't the 19th century. When do girls where t-shirts in a pool?

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Response to Matariki (Reply #199)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:21 PM

200. My comment was not sexist

 

That is the whole problem with a lot of liberals today. They
are too "out there" and cannot think of anything without
seeing political correctness.

Modesty is modesty - period. Asking girls to be modest is not
sexist. Besides, the school's note did say no "Speedos" which
was for the boys. I'm okay with that, too. So, am I sexist if
I believe both boys and girls should dress modestly for a pool party
at a school?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #200)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:24 PM

201. LOL - "the whole problem with a lot of liberals today"

You probably really believe you're not being sexist. However. You are advocating a DOUBLE STANDARD for girls. Pretty much the definition of sexist.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #200)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:12 PM

210. "the whole problem with a lot of liberals today" is not wanting double standards?


"the whole problem with a lot of liberals today" is speaking out against racism?
"the whole problem with a lot of liberals today" is speaking out against sexism?

Hey, guess what. It isn't "political correctness" but being a liberal.

"Modesty is modesty - period."? Nope. Modesty, like love, is in the eye of the beholder. Otherwise why are some in burqas, some topless, depending on the country?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #200)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:20 PM

213. oh dear. are we liberaling wrong again?

Please tell us where else we're doing it wrong. Comprehensive sex ed? Birth control covered by insurance? Abortion rights? Equal pay for equal work? No more glass ceilings? What other "liberal" ideas have we silly girls been mistakenly thinking were good for our daughters? Inquiring minds want to know.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Fri May 22, 2015, 09:19 PM

53. Grandma, is that you?

They have the internet up there?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Fri May 22, 2015, 09:26 PM

54. Wearing extra clothes while swimming is not "proper."

It's weird to expect people to wear something other than a swimming suit. If you want to only have modest swimming suits, make rules about what swimming suits are allowed. Street clothes don't belong in swimming pools and it isn't normal to make a rule requiring that.

Also, are the boys allowed to go bare-chested, or are they required to wear shirts too?

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Response to gollygee (Reply #54)

Fri May 22, 2015, 11:18 PM

55. It didn't say they

 

had to wear the t-shirt while swimming, did it? Boys are
allowed to go bare-chested because they are boys. Duh

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Response to ann--- (Reply #55)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:12 AM

61. Yes, it says they have to wear a shirt over their swimsuit

and it doesn't say they can take it off in the pool.

A girl in a swimsuit is not less modest than a boy in a swimsuit. If they feel a need to have the girls wear more clothing, then it seems like they'd want the boys to wear more too. Unless they're just being sexist.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #61)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:56 AM

62. OMG - but it didn't say "while in the pool"

 

I think the school may be expecting some of those young girls
to come to the party in suits that may be immodest and
wearing a t-shirt would take care of that. Maybe the school
anticipates that some of the parents (like some in this thread) wouldn't
care if their young, developing daughters wore revealing suits simply
because "boys can do it."

I just don't understand where the morals are today in this world - regardless
of whether one votes Dem or not - there are still ethics and self-respect we can teach our
children. Expecting modesty from young girls at a pool party doesn't stifle
their womanhood in any way. It teaches them to respect themselves.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #62)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:04 AM

64. Wearing a t-shirt at a pool goes beyond modesty

they could have easily made requirements about the swimsuit. My daughter has had to wear a "modest 1-piece" swimsuit for some things. Making them wear a t-shirt doesn't teach them to respect themselves. It teaches them that they are dirty and have to be covered. Shame is not a good teaching tool.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #64)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:16 AM

66. Have you

 

SEEN some of the suits and bikinis that young girls
wear today? It's NOT teaching them that it's "dirty" not
to cover up body parts that should be covered up in public, the requirement
ensures that ALL girls will be covered regardless of what they wear. If
they could be counted on to wear a modest suit for a 6th grader, it
would not be necessary. Obviously, the parent in this case who is
whining about her daughter not being able to parade around the way
SHE wants her to makes it obvious that the school would anticipate
that parents are not choosy about what their daughters wear.

Thus the requirement to avoid problems. I just do not understand what
the problem is.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #66)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:46 AM

72. Why not just require them all to wear this instead?

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burqini

In addition, why aren't the boys required to cover up?

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #72)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:54 PM

87. Boys

 

don't have the same kind of breasts.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #87)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:58 PM

90. So? n/t

 

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Response to ann--- (Reply #87)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:58 PM

91. Overweight boys have larger breasts than many 6th grade girls. Why should he be allowed his

moobs to show and they be required to wear a t-shirt over their flat chests?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #87)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:48 PM

127. They don't?

That will be news to anatomists. Boys have exactly the same tissues in their breasts as girls, complete with erectile nipples. They just don't have the hormones needed to stimulate breast growth at puberty. Well, most of the time. Gynecomastia is very common in adolescent boys. Their breasts enlarge due to a hormone imbalance. Give a man the right hormones and he will produce milk, even.

Men have exactly the same breasts as women. They just haven't been activated by female hormones. They're there, though, and have every structure a woman's breast have. You simply do not have the correct facts.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #87)

Sat May 23, 2015, 04:11 PM

135. Apparently, you have never seen moobs.

LOTS of boys have the same kind of breasts, especially in America.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #66)

Sat May 23, 2015, 01:55 PM

76. Requiring girls to be fully covered isn't shaming but simply ensures all will be covered?



It's NOT teaching them that it's "dirty" not to cover up body parts that should be covered up in public

Yes, it is teaching them that it is dirty to not cover up all the parts you think SHOULD be covered. That is exactly what this is. YOU want to chose what they SHOULD cover for what YOU consider modest.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #66)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:48 PM

82. I have daughters

6 and 13. I know what suits are available and you're exaggerating. Regardless, they could have made rules about what suits were acceptable as easily as they made this rule.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #82)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:03 PM

97. And, if the school

 

had told parents what type of bathing suits the girls
must wear, there would be an even worse uproar than
this whiny parent who doesn't want to follow the rules.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #97)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:06 PM

98. Whiny parents?

this is getting into "I don't drink with you" territory. Parents are routinely told that girls must have one-piece bathing suits. I have girls, and I have experience here. That would be expected.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #98)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:10 PM

101. The article did not say that

 

one piece bathing suits were required.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #101)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:12 PM

104. No but if they had been

the parents would probably have not been surprised as that's pretty common. They didn't have to require shirts. That wasn't easier.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #104)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:14 PM

106. That's all speculation

 

How do you know if that same whiny parent wouldn't complain
about having to wear a one-piece suit?

Bottom line - the school can make the rules for the party, in my view.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #106)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:16 PM

108. And they can expect negative feedback if they make stupid rules

And IMO they should if the rules are set up to create an atmosphere of shame for developing girls.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #108)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:20 PM

114. OMG

 

Bye

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Response to ann--- (Reply #114)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:22 PM

117. Oh good, are you leaving DU? n/t

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Response to tammywammy (Reply #117)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:18 PM

161. ...



Well played.

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Response to tammywammy (Reply #117)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:21 AM

189. That's unnecessary.

I completely disagree with Ann, but really?

Is it necessary to be so rude to someone just because you disagree?

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Response to tammywammy (Reply #117)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:33 PM

219. It's an interesting debate

I don't know that we have to drive out everyone with a varying view.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #106)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:35 PM

121. This "whiny parent" had a son, not a daughter. She emailed the school, asked for ALL kids to

wear t-shirts and the school said no.

Smith’s first move, earlier this week, was to contact the school’s principal, asking for an explanation of the rule. In her initial email to Smith, the school principal of Rhoades Elementary in Indianapolis, said that, in the past, girls had worn “very inappropriate swimsuits and covering up takes care of that issue” without forcing students to spend money on new swimsuits. She also said the rule helps prevent teasing.

“Due to the varying sizes of students at this age, [making T-shirts mandatory] takes away the ability of kiddos making fun of others for wearing a shirt [since] everyone is required to wear one,” she wrote.

But Smith fired back with academic research to justify her concerns. She wrote:

(clip)

Smith’s proposed solution? Make everyone — boys and girls — wear T-shirts.

According to emails provided to me by Smith, neither the principal nor the superintendent were on board with that idea. Metropolitan District of Wayne Township superintendent Dr. Jeff Butts said that he supported the elementary school’s efforts “to address the concerns that have arisen from past events of this nature.”

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #121)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:34 PM

220. It's Indiana - I'm trying to image the swim suits sold to 11 year olds

that are "very inappropriate."

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Response to ann--- (Reply #97)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:08 PM

99. I disagree with this rule, would've protested it when my child was in 6th grade. Am I "whiny" too?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #97)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:29 PM

118. Yo ann -- The mom who protested had a SON but she recognized sexist bullshit when she saw it.

 

Unlike you.

You promote sexist bullshit.

Honestly, do you know how you sound? Like the fucking Church Lady.

There, more vulgarity for you. Maybe you should go fetch your smelling salts and fainting couch before you get a fit of the vapors.

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #118)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:58 PM

169. Whoa

 

a great example of why DU is not the place it used to be.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #169)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:04 PM

178. Uh, I've been here since 2001. Maybe you're the one changing it for the worse.

 

Buh bye!

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Response to ann--- (Reply #66)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:24 PM

138. It's very awkward to be around a 13 year old in a bikini

for some guys, anyway.

My neighbor's daughter had the body of an eighteen year old when she was thirteen. When we'd be there for neighborhood barbecues/pool parties, my husband would cringe when this child would walk through the house in her itty bitty bikini without a coverup through a roomful of men. Shouldn't grown men be uncomfortable around a young teen in a very sexy bikini?

As for the school party, I think it's wrong to tell girls that they have to wear a coverup in the pool, but some girls will inevitably show up in very, very tiny suits. I just don't understand the mindset that puts a twelve year old in a string bikini.

My daughters didn't wear bikinis until high school, and even then we had some limits. No string bikinis. No thong bikinis.

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #138)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:46 PM

141. It isn't the job of kids to make grown men comfortable

Yes girls' bodies develop around this age, but that isn't a bad thing. It's biologically normal. Although this was a 6th grade party so they would be 12, not 13 yet, and there's a lot of physical maturity for girls between 12 and 13, but they'd still be in the process of maturing, and some might be pretty physically mature.

It's the job of adults to be appropriate around kids regardless of what they're wearing. My husband was around our then 12-year-old daughter and her friends at the lake all last summer and he didn't seem disturbed or upset by it. They're kids regardless of what they're wearing. He didn't treat them any differently than when they were 9 and at the lake.

I don't honestly care what bathing suits they were wearing, but schools do pretty routinely say "one piece suits." That would have made more sense than telling them to put a shirt over their suits, which is weird, and was so clearly different from what boys were to wear.

The main issue here is that it isn't the job of girls or women to keep men from sexualizing them. Girls' bodies should not be policed to make men more comfortable. Especially adult men should be expected to be able to control themselves. Kids should wear the suits they find most comfortable, and the swimsuits I've seen for tweens are not that mature. At 12, my daughter wouldn't have fit in an adult bikini top. At 13 they are a bit more developed and this year I have to go to the junior's department to find clothes for my daughter, and we are having to work harder to find a suit she will be comfortable in. But I'm shopping to find a suit she'll be comfortable and be able to move around and play comfortably in. I am not shopping out of concern for the eyes of men or boys.

The mindset of this note in the OP is the same mindset that puts women in burqas or says women's arms and legs should be covered at all times regardless of the heat. Men who find girls in bathing suits attractive will also find girls in shorts and a t-shirt, or jeans, or whatever else attractive. How far should they go to keep men comfortable? That isn't the girls' responsibility. And bathing suits are perfectly appropriate for swimming pools, whether girls' bodies are developed or not.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #141)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:06 PM

146. Maybe it behooves us all to act appropriately

And in my opinion, it's the culture and their mothers that are sexualizing young girls. I don't think you can't blame that on men.

Seriously, my kids were not dressed by "the church lady." That's not how I want to come across here. My kid was the cute 13 year old in the short skirt - just not the cute kid in the short, "sexy" skirt.

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #146)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:09 PM

147. A great number of people

define "short skirt" as sexy no matter what. I'm not sure what a non-sexy short skirt looks like. This sounds very subjective and questionable.

You could just as easily say, "My 13-year-old wears a bikini, but just a bikini, not a sexy bikini." It's in the eye of the beholder. One person sees a kid in a bathing suit, another person sees the same kid in the same bathing suit and sees "sexy." It's possible that none of us see our own kids as sexy and interpert them as just in a bathing suit but not a sexy one, or just in a short skirt but not in a sexy one, but other people might see them as the "sexualized" kid.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #141)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:31 PM

163. Thank you!

Why are women constantly expected to jump through hoops because so many men are perverts who had parents that never taught them to control themselves and act halfway decent? Women should not have to jump through hoops to satisfy men, one way or the other. There are plenty of men who aren't so juvenile and know how to control themselves. So, boys can, for a fact, be raised to become adult men instead of 14 year old boys in a man's body.

Placing the onus on women to dress a certain way to keep perverted men with no self control is no different than the extremists in the ME who force women to wear clothing to cover every part of their body except their eyes. People who claim that women who are showing any skin are somehow asking for it need to go take a look at the 12 year old LDS sister-wives who dress in clothing that covers almost every inch of their body and ask them how that somehow magically stops perverts. Obviously, it doesn't.

Something is wrong when women are expected to jump through hoops because some men were never raised to have any willpower or self control...or a healthy mentality when it comes to the difference between children and adults, at the very least. It says a lot about a man if he is uncomfortable around teenage girls wearing a swimsuit...and none of it is good. There is something extremely wrong in our culture when pedophiles make the rules and that seems to be what it happening with these types of rules.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #163)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:57 PM

168. 6th grade girls dressing

 

modestly at a pool is NOT "jumping through hoops." It is
common decency.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #168)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:03 PM

171. A swimsuit on a 12 year old isn't immodest

It's a swimsuit for goodness sake. I actually feel bad for you that you'd even contemplate that a prepubescent child could be immodest and need to wear a freaking shirt at a swim party over their swimsuits.

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Response to tammywammy (Reply #171)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:05 PM

173. How many times do I have to say this

 

The school is probably anticipating that SOME parents will
send their (some well developed) 6th grade daughters to the pool party in a swimsuit
or bikini that is inappropriate. I actually feel bad for those who
cannot see that decency is being advocated here by the school - not shaming. It
boggles my mind.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #173)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:14 PM

176. Making them wear a shirt is shaming

If the school was worried about bikinis then they could have simply said "no bikinis" or "one piece only". Parents are used to one piece only rules, not this body shaming bullshit. Wearing a shirt in a pool is uncomfortable and not the usual practice.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #141)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:37 PM

223. Your last sentence says it all

Even when I was a kid, bathing suits were fine for the pool. Even bikinis. And through teenhood. In 6th grade, there was no question.

And that was long ago.

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #138)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:10 PM

148. Grown men should be uncomfortable considering a 12 or 13 yr old as sexy.

It is THEIR problem, they should be uncomfortable. The way to NOT deal properly is to make the child cover up.

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #148)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:35 PM

165. Exactly.

There is something way wrong with a man who considers a 12 or 13 year old sexy. Period. There is no excuse for that.

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #138)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:01 PM

170. Maybe the school

 

administration realized that some parents WOULD allow their young
daughters to wear skimpy bikinis and that's why they required a cover shirt.

I'm so glad to find someone who also doesn't understand the mindset
that puts a twelve year old in a string bikini. I think the school was trying
to avoid the inevitable problems if parents did send their daughters to the party
dressed that way.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #170)

Sun May 24, 2015, 07:18 AM

185. What would the inevitable problems be? n/t

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Response to TexasMommaWithAHat (Reply #138)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:38 PM

206. Sooooo the young girl shouldn't wear a bathing suit at a swimming pool because the males can't

control themselves?

Why can't men control themselves?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #62)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:29 PM

218. I see your point to a degree

But at swim parties, even over 40 years ago when I was that age, nobody told us we had to do that. We'd wear our suits and carry a towel. For 2015, this seems a bit much for a pool party.

I recall when our junior high school had to ban halter tops at school because of one well endowed 7th grader. I have no problem with that limit. But when going swimming, bathing suits seem to me to be enough and ought to be enough. They should have required the shirts for the boys - for the non swimming part of the party, all of the kids could have been required to wear shirts.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #55)

Sat May 23, 2015, 01:49 PM

74. boys are allowed to go bare-chested because they have xy chromosome? wtf?

boys have nipples and their chests can inspire lustful thoughts also.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Sat May 23, 2015, 01:09 AM

58. Who made you Pope of this dump?

I don't think many appreciate your censoring prudery. There are plenty of sites on the web you can go to if you don't like the community here.

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Response to TransitJohn (Reply #58)

Sat May 23, 2015, 08:57 AM

63. No one

 

I didn't say I was "pope" of anything. I was expressing my
distaste for the vulgarity that is so blatant in many of the
threads on this forum. That doesn't make me any less of a
liberal than you or anyone else.

I think vulgarity is disrespectful and most of all - unnecessary.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #63)

Sat May 23, 2015, 01:51 PM

75. I think shaming girls is more disrespectful than a fucking word on a forum

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #75)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:04 PM

78. AMEN!!!!

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #75)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:55 PM

131. Exactly

Most sixth grade girls I know wouldn't be "immodest" in the first place, so the whole t-shirt requirement was just focused on body-shaming the girls.

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #75)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:56 PM

153. Absolutely right. nt

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:46 PM

126. Fucking is not a vulgar word.

Grow up and pop your sanctimonious head out of your ass.

It's a beautiful day and you'll see it and the smell will be much better.

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Response to alphafemale (Reply #126)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:25 PM

203. Only to those who use it constantly

 

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Response to ann--- (Reply #203)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:07 PM

208. You have that backwards. It is vulgar to those who don't use it because THEY consider it vulgar

to the fucking people who fucking use it every fucking day it is in no fucking way fucking vulgar.

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #208)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:23 PM

216. Fucking A!

lol.

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #208)

Sun May 24, 2015, 04:45 PM

229. If it weren't, on some level, considered negative, it wouldn't be used as an insult ala "fuck you"!

A little honesty, please.

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Response to whathehell (Reply #229)

Sun May 24, 2015, 04:50 PM

230. "I don't believe I just fucking read that". It is used as emphasis in the phrase objected to

"A little honesty, please. "

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #230)

Sun May 24, 2015, 04:52 PM

231. No shit, sherlock, but it is ALSO used as a negative as in "Fuck You"

Yeah, and back at ya.

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Response to whathehell (Reply #231)

Sun May 24, 2015, 05:08 PM

232. Right you are, Watson. As is "shit".

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #232)

Sun May 24, 2015, 05:44 PM

235. Back shit at ya, bro

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:01 PM

145. Modesty and decency means NOT sexualizing young kids

like you continue to do. Your obsession with the bodies of kids swimming in swimsuits and your judgmental attitudes about this make me really wonder what goes on in YOUR head. Because you seem to be projecting all sorts of perversity onto young kids.

You come across creepy as hell, to be honest.

Swimming in a swimsuit is improper? FFS.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #45)


Response to Name removed (Reply #221)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:39 PM

224. Hey there, did you read the article where the school said they were wrong after the mom

protested. They said t-shirts were optional for all?

Reading. It's good.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:47 PM

23. WTF?

6th grade girls should be taught modesty? That's totally fucked up.

Swim suits cover what needs to be covered.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:58 PM

33. You seem to be a misogynist, why are you on this board?

 

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026595616#post77

Also, question, what does self respect have to do with not being a rape victim?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026595616#post102

On top of all that, what do you think is going to happen?

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #33)

Fri May 22, 2015, 06:57 PM

43. Whoa

 

I have a stalker?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #43)

Fri May 22, 2015, 07:22 PM

47. Correction, I have a memory. And the internet has a memory that generally never forgets. n/t

 

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #47)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:44 PM

225. you are going after the poster rather than sticking to the point

and trying to drive someone off the board over a disagreement.

People might still be liberals if they think sex is for adults. As long as that applies to both sexes.

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Response to treestar (Reply #225)

Sun May 24, 2015, 04:40 PM

228. Yet they continue to say only girls need to cover up, that boys breasts are different

and they don't need to be covered up.

It is interesting how few people on this thread seem to have read the linked story. The school changed their tune, said t-shirts are optional and for both sexes. Not just girls.

I see that poster as missing the "As long as that applies to both sexes" and creepy that the focus is on feeling sexual towards a 12 year old girl in a swim suit while trying to make the 12 year old girl responsible for other's issues.

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Response to treestar (Reply #225)

Mon May 25, 2015, 03:31 PM

265. This has nothing to do with sex, but rather misogyny. What they are arguing for...

 

is categorically no different than demanding women wear burkas, because its THEM who are making it about sex, under the veneer of "modesty", not us feminists.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #43)

Fri May 22, 2015, 09:19 PM

52. No you have a bullseye.

 

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Response to ann--- (Reply #43)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:51 PM

84. You should have been banned for that comment about drunk girls

 

wearing certain clothing inviting rape.

Your attitudes about women are completely fucked up.

I hope you really don't have a daughter. I feel sorry for her if she exists.

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #84)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:54 PM

86. I never

 

said any such thing.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #86)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:56 PM

89. You certainly did:

 

"but it might make a girl have some self-respect and
maybe she won't get drunk and be the object of
some rapist who would take advantage of her."

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #89)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:11 PM

103. And where does it say

 

anything about what she is wearing - it DOESN'T.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #103)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:13 PM

105. You said drunk girls got raped because they didn't respect themselves

It's the same kind of misogyny, just ramped up to college age.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #105)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:15 PM

107. No, I didn't

 

I never said or implied any such thing. I'm really done
with this thread. It is unbelievable to me how words get
twisted simply because of lack of reading comprehension.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #107)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:16 PM

109. Everybody can read it.

"but it might make a girl have some self-respect and
maybe she won't get drunk and be the object of
some rapist who would take advantage of her."

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Response to gollygee (Reply #109)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:20 PM

112. Where did I say anything about

 

what she is wearing? I never said any such thing.
I said I agree with whoever created that poster which
reminds girls not to get drunk "and be the object of
some rapist who would take advantage of her."

That blames the RAPIST who would take advantage of her - not
the girl.

Something seriously wrong with people who cannot
understand that. Bye - I'm done with this thread.
Sometimes I can see why people think liberals are
way "out there."

Even liberals like me have ethics and morals - whether you
think that is wrong I don't care.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #112)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:22 PM

116. Wearing a shirt over a swimming suit to a pool is not "morals" or "ethics."n/t

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Response to gollygee (Reply #116)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:55 PM

167. Yes, it is

 

It is the administration trying to teach modesty to children.
Modesty is moral and ethical.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #167)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:13 PM

181. Teaching 12 year old girls to be ashamed of their bodies is not moral or ethical

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Response to ann--- (Reply #167)

Sun May 24, 2015, 07:15 AM

184. No because then

wearing a swimming suit to a swimming pool would be immoral and unethical. Which it isn't.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #107)

Mon May 25, 2015, 01:57 PM

260. It isn't a lack of reading comprehension

 

It happens here constantly here. It is people looking to be righteous on the Internet.... Even if they have to make shit up to do so.

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #84)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:03 PM

198. + infinity. n/t

 

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Response to ann--- (Reply #43)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:55 PM

130. No, you do not have a stalker. You posted something

pretty silly, and people are challenging you on it. DU is a PUBLIC forum. If you post anything here, you should expect other DUers to comment on it. If you post misogynistic stuff, you'll certainly get comments. Forcing 12 year old girls to wear t-shirts to cover up their breasts is just stupid. Beginning in puberty, girls' breasts begin to enlarge. It's a completely natural thing to happen. Shaming them for simply growing up is exceedingly stupid. Instead, boys should be educated in the basic fundamentals of human development. Breasts develop so infants can be fed, not so boys will get erections. That's what we need to teach, not that girls' breasts are somehow shameful and should be covered up or camouflaged.

These days, many girls begin puberty at 10 years of age or even younger. That's a fact. Should they be ashamed of growing up? I don't think so.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #43)

Sun May 24, 2015, 04:24 PM

227. You're not alone.

He did the same to me on an entirely different subject.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 03:19 PM

38. Really? Yes, I can imagine what might happen.

Kids swimming and diving into the pool. Splashing wars. Lots of loud yelling and squealing. Most sixth grade boys haven't even begun puberty yet, so they're not interested too much in girls, although they might look at them, wondering what the big deal was.

Worrying about what bathing suits 12 year olds wear seems over the top. Most will wear rather modest ones, because they're new and shy about their body changes.

Uff da! T-shirts, indeed!

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 05:19 PM

40. Thanks for your input, Ms. Dugger. (nt)

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)


Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Fri May 22, 2015, 06:59 PM

44. You think it's inappropriate to wear a swimming suit to a pool?

Yes, that's shaming. Modesty is wearing a swimming suit at the pool that provides adequate coverage. Having to wear a shirt over it would be uncomfortable make it more difficult to swim. There's nothing safety related here. Your whole post is absolutely ridiculous.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:50 AM

60. Boys have nipples. Why shouldn't a fair policy have required them to wear t-shirts, too?

That would be treating them equally.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:17 AM

67. Please tell me you are just messing with us. nt

 

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Response to Logical (Reply #67)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:44 AM

71. She posted that girls aren't turned on by bare chested guys in a response...

 

to me, lower in the thread.

No one can be that stupid, can they?

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #71)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:58 PM

133. Yeah, tell that one to my wife

 

The first thing that grabbed her was my hairy chest. I think it had something to do with her teenage crush- Tom Selleck

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #71)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:06 PM

137. in answer to your question: yes, clearly they can

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:46 PM

81. WTF?!!

 

Have you ever been to a public pool?

Why is it the girls' responsibility to cover up and be "modest"? Why should they be ashamed of their bodies? Because a boy could get a boner? Jesus fucking Christ.

This is just so fucking over-the-top retro sexist I'm speechless.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:53 PM

85. You deserve all the scorn you're getting from this post. nt

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Response to abelenkpe (Reply #85)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:24 PM

202. Wow

 

DU has become rancid.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #202)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:08 PM

209. DU is rancid for heaping scorn on someone who thinks 12 year old girls need to take responsibility

for the possible arousal of men?

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Response to uppityperson (Reply #209)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:06 PM

250. End scene.

You nailed it.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:30 PM

120. Remember all the people that got all freaked out because the Obama girls wore SLEEVELESS

dresses to the Inauguration?

Same thing. My goodness, bathing suits in a swimming pool! We could go all Burkini if you like! That's right, hide the girls from the boys, so they end up like the nutjobs in ISIS. Those freaks are SOOO sexually repressed they get turned on by adolescent females and throw potentially gay people from tall buildings to their deaths.

The whole point of women covering themselves in the muslim cultures is to protect them from the lusts of men. Hey, look how well THAT turned out!
(yes, I know, modesty in the eyes of their gods, blah blah blah, but if we break it down to the bottom line, it's because men fear their own reactions around females in these repressed, backwards and un-evolved cultures, discuss at great length...)

Go ahead, name a culture that has suppressed the sexuality of their males and females to any benefit, at all, whatsoever!

You'll absolutely find that cultures with a healthy, normal regard for the human body are far more advanced socially, psychologically and emotionally. Talking openly about SEX, our bodies, where babies come from and our responsibilities for our bodies from an early age is the key to growth and healthy psychological well being.

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Response to underahedgerow (Reply #120)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:25 PM

204. Good post. Well put.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:41 PM

123. Crazy sister-in-law Ann, is that you?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:41 PM

124. I think I figured out who this poster is...

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:58 PM

132. It IS shaming

Telling the girls to wear t-shirts, while the boys go bare-chested, is definitely shaming the girls. It's too bad you can't understand that.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:51 PM

151. i was a competitive swimmer from 4-18. i wore a suit almost as much as clothes. damn good thing we

 

all were mature enough to handle it a tons better than some adults i am reading in this thread.

fuckin 10 and 11 yr old girls. fuck that.

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Response to seabeyond (Reply #151)

Sat May 23, 2015, 07:00 PM

156. plus, being in a pool in a shirt is uncomfortable

I'm very fair skinned and in younger years sometimes I would wear a shirt to swim. Getting a break from the gallon of sun block needed wasn't worth it. Ugh.

BTW, as a day care kid we went to the pool every Tuesday & Thursday all summer long.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:18 AM

188. Burkhas are well known for their utility as flotation devices

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sun May 24, 2015, 12:03 PM

190. Of course. Plenty of people agree with you

Nothing is quite so important to a developing girl as modesty. Next thing you know they'll be thinking they can swim too, and then where will we all be?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:01 PM

197. It's shaming.

 

And your post is shameful.

I'm floored that you are stubbornly ignoring ALL of the feedback you are getting on this.

"And, if it's really a SWIMMING party"

Well, what did you think it really was?

Your post is incredibly disturbing and I have to agree with others that this doesn't seem to be the site for you.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:37 PM

222. Are you serious or not?

Subtle satire mocking such attitudes?

If not, as with most others who have replied, I'm curious what you believe will happen.


Also, who decides what is modest? I don't find two piece swimsuits immodest. Should they be forced to wear burqas? Not very practical for swimming, but there won't be any room for claims of immodesty.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sun May 24, 2015, 10:02 PM

246. Never been to Europe, have you?

Little kids, OH THE HORROR, swimming NEKKID!111!!!!

And safer in what respect? Of your sensibilities?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:59 PM

256. I missed this.

 

Yes modesty and safety and the key words. All the sexists will be coming out of the woodwork, along with all the pervs.

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Response to PRB (Reply #256)

Mon May 25, 2015, 03:16 PM

264. Modesty for girls only though, that's what makes it sexist. n/t

 

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Mon May 25, 2015, 12:34 AM

258. If so, the boys should be required to do the same.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #1)

Thu May 28, 2015, 03:24 PM

267. LONGEST SUBTHREAD EVER!

 

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:03 PM

2. I'm old. Why no Speedos ?

 

Years ago my kids all wore them.

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Response to virgogal (Reply #2)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:15 PM

8. Dunno -- especially since not all Speedos are either brief...

Last edited Sat Aug 29, 2020, 12:53 PM - Edit history (3)




OR briefs:




rocktivity

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Response to rocktivity (Reply #8)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:19 PM

9. Thanks----it's a puzzlement.

 

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:10 PM

3. Kudos to Jennifer Smith! Way to go Mom!

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:15 PM

7. Thank you and Good job Jennifer!

Speedos makes swimsuits for girls too. So no one can wear a Speedos brand suit.
Speedos should file a suit with ISDS over loss of profit by the school district

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Response to Dont call me Shirley (Reply #7)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:23 PM

11. I almost exclusively wore Speedos when I was young...

I remember loving the cut and the colors (not to mention that they were very well made).

Don't ask me about my brief Body Glove phase!

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Response to demmiblue (Reply #11)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:26 PM

13. So what about your brief....

Oh, nevermind!

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Response to demmiblue (Reply #11)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:24 PM

28. I was in swim team in the late 60s

and everyone wore speedos.

America is obsessed with sex.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:21 PM

10. Any reply that alludes to "back in my day" is not up-to-date on the stripperfication of young

 

girls' attire. J/S/.

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Response to WinkyDink (Reply #10)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:11 PM

25. We're talking swimsuits here

 


I can't see where junior girls swimsuits have gotten any more "strippery".

I either go to the wrong beaches and pools, or I am going to the wrong strip joints, because I've never gotten confused about where I was.

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Response to WinkyDink (Reply #10)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:54 PM

31. I just went swimsuit shopping for my 7th grader at a very trendy teen fashion store.

 

Most of the suits were one-piece, none were outlandish.

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Response to WinkyDink (Reply #10)

Fri May 22, 2015, 07:02 PM

46. I have a young girl and a young teen

and their swimsuits are not stripperish. I'd have to go to a store that sells swimsuits for adults to find something like you're thinking of, and it wouldn't fit most 12-year-olds.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:28 PM

15. I bought a pool heater today...

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Response to ileus (Reply #15)

Fri May 22, 2015, 01:44 PM

21. No nipples for you.

Hard ones, anyway.

AND NO SEX, EITHER!!

Damned kids, always sexing up the sexy sex stuff.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:18 PM

27. Bet the guys are gonna love that all boy pool party. nt

 

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 02:43 PM

29. And horny boys are applauding her actions too

nt

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Response to bluestateguy (Reply #29)

Fri May 22, 2015, 06:55 PM

42. Exactly

 

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Response to bluestateguy (Reply #29)

Fri May 22, 2015, 09:04 PM

50. And I'm sure horny girls applaud the fact that boys aren't required to wear t-shirts...

 

what is the point of your post?

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Response to Humanist_Activist (Reply #50)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:17 AM

68. Since when are

 

girls "turned on" by a bare-chested boy? How ridiculous.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #68)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:40 AM

70. Uhm, since humans have existed? Do you know anything about human sexuality?

 

Seriously, have you ever talked to girls or women before about what they like?

ON EDIT: Actually, come to think of it, have you ever looked at the fandoms for a lot of shows on The CW? Most of them are eye candy for girls and gay men, not straight guys and lesbians. And yes, bare chests are not unusual.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #68)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:54 PM

88. Are you serious?

What? Yes, girls that age are "turned on" by boys their age without shirts. Young hormones. You must not have had daughters?

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Response to gollygee (Reply #88)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:59 PM

92. So, what you're saying is

 

a boy going bare chested is the same thing as a girl going
bare chested - or almost bare chested in a bikini?

I am a female and seeing bare-chested men at a pool or the beach
is a common sight and not inappropriate (or sexual) at all - in that setting.

I just don't understand the comparison. 6th grade girls should respect
their bodies enough to make sure they can have a good time swimming
at a pool party - even if it means wearing a t-shirt as a cover up afterwards.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #92)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:02 PM

95. A boy going bare chested is directly parallel to a girl in a bikini

Seeing girls in bathing suits is also a common sight and not inappropriate (or sexual) when swimming, the same as when men and boys wear swimming suits.

You're saying that if they wear swimming suits to a pool, they aren't respecting their bodies. Do you not see how messed up that is? Do you have some kind of history or problem that leads to your views here? Because this just plain isn't normal.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #95)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:09 PM

100. It is not

 

I NEVER said that wearing swimming suits to a pool isn't respecting their bodies.
That is what people who can't read are gleaning from what I am saying.

I am saying that the administration is trying to PREVENT a young girl being
seen in inappropriate bathing suit which the parent might allow her to wear.
Instead of telling the parents what kind of suit the girls SHOULD wear, they
are simply asking they be covered up with a t-shirt - that's the way I see it.

Personally, I think it isn't normal for a parent to whine to a school about the
rules of proper dress at a pool party. I don't have a problem with parents
allowing their kids to wear whatever they allow them to wear at a PUBLIC
pool. This is a SCHOOL party, isn't it? So they make the rules - period. There is
nothing wrong with it - in my view.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #100)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:11 PM

102. How is creating this shame-based environment

better for girls than being in a swimsuit that you might find inappropriate? If the parent is OK with it, why would you even care?

The schools are public institutions and are responsible to the taxpayers just like any public institution.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #100)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:56 PM

226. trouble is they are letting the girls know they have

something to cover up without saying the same to the boys.

They all start even with the swim suit, perfectly appropriate for the pool. Then next comes the cover up requirement. Apply it to both sexes and it makes sense. Apply it to just the girls and you tell the girls they need covering up and the boys don't.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #92)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:03 PM

96. Girls "should respect their bodies enough" to take responsibility for your issues?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #92)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:59 PM

155. It should be the same fucking thing

and for you not to think so is sexist.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #68)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:01 PM

94. Since forever. Good lord, look at book covers, look at movies and tv shows.

look around you.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #68)

Sun May 24, 2015, 02:32 PM

205. OMG Funny!! Girls not turned on by bare-chested boys

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Response to bluestateguy (Reply #29)

Fri May 22, 2015, 11:49 PM

56. These are elementary school boys and girls. That's ridiculous

 

Lets just say there ARE any horny elementary school age kids, then by your assumptions both the boys AND girls should be covered up...

Yet only the girls are asked to cover.

That's body shaming the girls.

Either both sexes have reached the "horny" stage and should be covered, or not.

Or even more logically, this is a swimming pool and swim suits will be worn. Get over it


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Response to bluestateguy (Reply #29)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:49 PM

150. pretty sophomoric blue, but not surprised. nt

 

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 03:17 PM

37. I'd like to see girls and boys in solidarity

with everyone wearing the required t-shirts, with giant, nekked boobies and pert nipples painted on the front!

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Response to procon (Reply #37)

Sat May 23, 2015, 09:18 AM

69. And

 

this is a prime example of why the school administrators try to avoid
such things at a pool party.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #69)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:33 AM

73. Women have breasts.

Get over it. Stop shaming girls just because the men in our culture have been taught to look at them as sex objects. Raise the bar.

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Response to procon (Reply #73)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:59 PM

93. And this is an age

where they're already feeling uncomfortable with their developing bodies. This kind of shame-based message is really hurtful.

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Response to procon (Reply #73)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:17 PM

110. I'm not shaming anyone

 

I'm saying I agree with the school that 6th grade girls
can be told how to dress at a pool party - even if the
parents don't like it.

Nothing wrong with being modest. Unless you're saying that
wanting a girl to dress modestly is "shaming" her. Ridiculous
twisting of intent.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #110)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:19 PM

111. Telling her that in order to be modest, she has to wear a shirt over her swimming suit

at a pool is shaming her. It's making her feel that her body in a swimsuit is immodest when the boys' bodies in swimsuits aren't considered immodest. That is shaming.

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Response to ann--- (Reply #110)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:21 PM

115. Telling girls they are not dressed modestly is shaming them.

If the way they dress is ok with them, and their parents, what right do you have to try and make them feel ashamed for not living up to your version of "modestly"?

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Response to ann--- (Reply #110)

Sat May 23, 2015, 04:21 PM

136. Think about it.

You are saying that girls with boobs are so embarrassingly different or deformed that they should not even be seen in public unless their bodies are shrouded from view. That sexist attitude would make any girl feel self conscious and ashamed. You're telling them they must hide their natural and normal bodies because those nippley bits are somehow so offensive that extra steps must be taken to ensure they are hidden, swaddled and covered up least someone become outraged, swoon, or become uncontrollably aroused if they catch a glimpse the human breast.

Can you describe what "modesty" looks like? Are we going back to the 1890s, maybe a burqa, and if a t-shirt is fitting swim attire, what about adding pantaloons... better yet just stop sexualizing women and girls.

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Response to procon (Reply #37)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:29 PM

119. I cannot understand how allowing the males to go topless while forcing the females to wear tops

is not inappropriate, sexist and misogynistic. If a person wants to go topless they should be able to if they are comfortable with that so long as others are allowed to be topless. Why the different rules for males and females at all?

Isn't forcing girls to wear tops of ANY kind while allowing boys to not wear tops also sexist/misogynistic, just to a lesser extent?

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Response to procon (Reply #37)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:53 PM

152. they are 10 and 11 yr old kids. how about NOT using the woman body to make a point of stupidity

 

with girls bodies.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Fri May 22, 2015, 03:21 PM

39. 6th grade and the admins are worried about what exactly?

 

Good citizenship? What fresh hell did that come from?

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 12:07 AM

57. Well, are there going to be any Duggar boys...

... at the party?

This is ridiculous. It's a pool party. This works to shame the girls, AND sends the message to the boys that they're not responsible for controlling their own urges. It's the same mentality that says boys will be boys.

And, her mother and I will teach our 6th grade daughter the concept of modesty. I don't need school officials telling her that there's something wrong with her body.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:49 AM

59. I'm very impressed that a mother of a son would think of this and take this stand. Good for her! nt

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 01:59 PM

77. She's right...

Boys don't have to wear shirts why should girls have too...


/facepalm

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:20 PM

79. Interesting discussion. In theory, all the students should be able to choose to wear tops or not.

Males and females both have nipples so o difference there so either the boys have to wear tops like the girls or neither boys nor girls should have to wear tops. There is no functional reason (for many) of the girls to have to wear tops. Not wearing a top does not make (many/any) of the girls go crazy and attack the boys so the girls not wearing a top should have a similar effects. Even IF the effects are not similar and the boys DO attack the girls not wearing tops, would saying that women have to wear tops at the pool be victim blaming?

I guess my question is why do the girls have to wear tops at all if the boys don't have to? Why can't they all go bare chested if that is comfortable to them?

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #79)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:37 PM

80. That is a good question and I agree, they should be allowed to.

There are cultures where everyone goes bare chested and ones where women are burqa'd. Why?

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #79)

Sat May 23, 2015, 07:02 PM

157. I agree 100% nt

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 02:49 PM

83. Hmmmmm, speedos? Really?

My kids wear speedos. They're on swim team. Son wears jammers, daughter wears a one peice. There's nothing inappropriate about them. Perhaps the administrators are the ones with the dirty mind.


eta:

T-shirt over a swimsuit? If they're not requiring the same from boys it is a message that the girls should be ashamed and made to cover up. Why not tell them to wear a burka and hide all that sinful flesh?

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Response to abelenkpe (Reply #83)

Sat May 23, 2015, 06:57 PM

154. so you know. i was competitive swimming too for a decade and half. for everyone to make a deal of it

 

spending all my youth in a speedo, with guys in speedo, a much more healthy environment in nonchalance. there was no big deal with it. among the adults or the kids.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:20 PM

113. Actually, that looks like a Title IX violation to me.

That is how I got the graduation dress code for women changed at RCC, the community college I went to at that time. They had a stipulation that women had to wear dresses and could not wear pant suits. There was no requirement that men must wear dresses too. That is giving women one set of rules and men another. I pointed out the Title IX violation to everyone in the administration and asked the ACLU about it. The ACLU sent a letter to them for me and they changed the dress code. Before that, they were sticking to their guns. The ACLU made them change their mind quite quickly.

When they announced the change, the women gave a standing ovation. I had no idea anyone else would appreciate the change as much as I did until I saw that. I was amazed, to be honest. I thought I would be the only one to complain about the policy.

My major at that time was Electrical/Electronics Technology. I had to crawl around on the floor and wire 600 Volt electrical circuits and wire transformers and wallow in the dust and dirt to pull wire and all of the other stuff just like the guys did. I'd like to see any of the administration at that college do THAT in a dress. The guys stood with me on that too. They said they sure wouldn't want to try it in a dress, lol. There was one other girl in the class, but she didn't seem all hell to interested in changing the policy. She said she would not march at graduation and just wanted the diploma. She didn't want to wear a dress either. Trust me, the two of us would have looked like Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari from Bosom Buddies if we had worn dresses.

Most women ended up wearing pants suits to graduation. I later got a Computer Engineering degree and still wore a pants suit to that graduation too. They didn't change the policy back once they finally changed it.

Any time they have a different set of rules for women or girls than they do for men or boys, it is a Title IX violation.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #113)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:37 PM

122. Would forcing girls to wear tops of ANY kind while allowing boys to not wear tops also be in

violation of Title IX?

Isn't forcing girls to wear tops of ANY kind while allowing boys to not wear tops also sexist/misogynistic, just to a lesser extent than a t-shirt (or a burka for that matter)?

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #122)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:43 PM

125. There is no reason the boys cannot be forced to wear shirts too.

That would settle it, actually.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #125)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:49 PM

128. I agree that having boys wear tops would be settle the Title IX issue. But you did not answer

if you thought allowing males to be topless while forcing females to wear tops (of any kind) would be a violation of Title IX? As someone who has experience in similar matters I would like to hear your opinion.

(I am not asking if you approve of females going topless or think it is a good idea, just if you think they should have the right to if makes can)

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #125)

Sat May 23, 2015, 03:50 PM

129. According to the article, that is what this mom of a boy asked for. School refused, then made

t-shirts optional after the mom said she was contacting the meia.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #125)

Sat May 23, 2015, 04:08 PM

134. Sure and then some would show up like this:



and:



But hey, they are wearing non-white t-shirts!

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Response to kelly1mm (Reply #134)

Mon May 16, 2016, 09:29 AM

271. God bless that Jamaica girl

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #113)

Sat May 23, 2015, 05:59 PM

144. Good for you! Thanks for standing up for women's rights.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)


Response to Post removed (Reply #172)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:06 PM

179. And the boys? How about them?

 

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Response to Post removed (Reply #172)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:13 PM

182. Do you wear a burqa when you go out?

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Response to Post removed (Reply #172)

Sun May 24, 2015, 03:25 PM

217. what is your obsession with modesty?

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Response to Post removed (Reply #172)

Sun May 24, 2015, 05:46 PM

236. You are a good citizen, comrade!

 

We all must OBEY!

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sat May 23, 2015, 10:15 PM

177. I am really disappointed in the posts I am reading on here. It is clear most people on DU are from

an older generation. I think I remember a poll once that gauged the age of DUers and most were older. It shows. The older generation was brought up being taught that girls' bodies are sexual and shameful. Maybe people who feel uncomfortable around teenage girls in swimsuits should do more to control their own thoughts instead of trying to make themselves feel better by controlling what young women are or are not allowed to wear.

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Response to liberal_at_heart (Reply #177)

Sat May 23, 2015, 11:08 PM

180. Part of the problem is the Big Three patriarchal monotheisms.

 

Christianity, Judaism, Islam. The world would be a much better place if those dumbass mythologies all fizzled out.

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Response to liberal_at_heart (Reply #177)

Sun May 24, 2015, 07:43 AM

186. No need to be disappointed, most of what you are reading are troll posts.

A couple of them were obvious from day 1.



Now, the MRA faction, that is a whole different story.

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Response to liberal_at_heart (Reply #177)

Sun May 24, 2015, 08:37 AM

187. Don't be disappointed ... the vast majority of posters believe the teacher was out of line

... and give the mom her due credit. A very few felt the need to post their sexist/ misogynistic views over and over.

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #187)

Sun May 24, 2015, 12:08 PM

191. Small correction: it was the administration not the teacher.

Teachers get enough shite!

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Response to demmiblue (Reply #191)

Sun May 24, 2015, 12:13 PM

193. Yep ... i am sorry I wanted to respond quickly

... as the vast majority of DUers are capable of evolved and informed thinking ... and I messed up

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #193)

Sun May 24, 2015, 12:18 PM

194. I hope I didn't sound like I was chastising you, I just wanted to point that out.

- to one proud member of the vast majority to another!

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Response to demmiblue (Reply #194)

Sun May 24, 2015, 12:23 PM

195. Not at all

It was an important distinction ... I try very hard to admit mistakes, correct when I can and move on (its a "me" thing, nothing you said was chastising , rude or anything else).

Hoping you are having a nice holiday weekend

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sun May 24, 2015, 01:55 PM

196. I don't know what is more shocking

[font style="font-family:'Georgia','Baskerville Old Face','Helvetica',fantasy;" size=4 color=teal]That a school would do something like this in this day and age....

Or the fact that there are people here on DU actually agreeing with the school. Seriously?

Kickass mom standing up against sexist dress code deserves our support![/font]

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sun May 24, 2015, 05:27 PM

234. 233 replies and I don't think anyone read far enough to see "No Speedos"

 

If this is a "contours" issue, it seems it is being applied equally.

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Response to Sen. Walter Sobchak (Reply #234)

Sun May 24, 2015, 06:40 PM

239. Speedo is a brand name ... it is often worn by competitive swimmers

... the girls/ women's versions are particularly covering and not prone to failure .... further proof the administrator that wrote this is an imbecile.

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #239)

Sun May 24, 2015, 07:32 PM

241. Speedo is as much a brand name as Kleenex is

 

999/1000 people will get it with no further explanation required.

Like most things on DU, the glaringly obvious intent is only misunderstood by people actively seeking to.

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Response to Sen. Walter Sobchak (Reply #241)

Sun May 24, 2015, 07:46 PM

242. Clearly you do not swim

Just because something is conjured in your mind does not make it so

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Response to etherealtruth (Reply #242)

Sun May 24, 2015, 09:47 PM

243. Google Image Search "speedo"

 

Any misunderstanding of the colloquial use of the phrase is your own rhetorical invention. That applies equally to most DU nit-picking.

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Response to Sen. Walter Sobchak (Reply #243)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:43 PM

253. Are you trying to be ironic?

If not intentional, it still gave me a good laugh ... I needed that.

Thank you!

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Response to Sen. Walter Sobchak (Reply #234)

Sun May 24, 2015, 06:59 PM

240. Did you read far enough in the article to see the school changed its policy after this mom protested

They said t-shirts were optional for boys and girls.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sun May 24, 2015, 11:44 PM

254. I was developing breasts in the 6th grade

It was very confusing. I doubt I would have worn a bathing suit at all. I spent a few years not going to the beach because I felt like a freak There were a few of us girls with our tiny breasts and we were teased constantly. I hope as a culture we've come further. I would not want to shame girls by singling them out.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Mon May 25, 2015, 12:32 AM

257. All participants should wear a t shirt

so they don't get sunburned. Required of ALL.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Mon May 25, 2015, 12:45 AM

259. Our pool parties would have been scandalous to these people.

We used to line up by the dozen at the diving board and do our best cannonballs and flips, I can't count the number of times we'd lose our tops or bottoms. It was funny and slightly embarrassing, but I don't remember any rapes happening, thank goodness.

We'd all lay around in the sun and nobody ever cared about who was wearing what.

I'm glad this woman is speaking up too, good for her.

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Response to polly7 (Reply #259)

Mon May 25, 2015, 02:03 PM

261. I wish the Puritans' ships had all sunk halfway across the Atlantic.

 

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #261)

Mon May 25, 2015, 02:51 PM

262. I'm sure glad there were none at our parties.

We had great teachers in those grades, they didn't stress over things that weren't harmful. I loved my teachers and gained so much from them in those years, when I see some of them now it's like seeing a long lost friend - it was a small school, so maybe they had more opportunity to connect with us all. Learning was fun - and so were those pool parties!

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Sun Aug 2, 2015, 09:35 AM

268. If I try really hard to be charitable

 

I can think of acceptable reasons for this rule. Like, maybe the teacher knows there is a shy or chubby or Muslim girl in the class who will want to wear a T shirt, and the teacher didn't want her to stick out like a sore thumb and be mocked.

OK I know it's a stretch. And in that case the rule should have been for all the students.

On the Muslim side of my family, the dad does order his daughters to wear shorts and sometimes tahirts over their swimsuits. But he prob wouldn't let them go to a mixed pool party in the first place.

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Response to demmiblue (Original post)

Thu Aug 6, 2015, 01:31 PM

269. speedo rule

I love that the first thing the OP had to do to justify the manufactured outrage, is dismiss the "no speedo" rule for boys....

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