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Sun Aug 31, 2014, 11:56 AM

mr. pete just sent me this Labour Day Poem

from the LAT:
Modern Love Incorporated
By Mike Orlock

When I was but a younger man,

still wet behind the ears,

my father gave me this advice

between his shots and beers:

"Don't waste your youth on women, boy,

Or needless complications.

If in love you're looking to invest,

find a corporation.

"Citizens United, boyo,

has changed the game of love.

A woman might be soft and sweet,

and fit you like a glove;

or men, if that's the way you swing,

might offer manly sex.

But when it comes to marriage, son,

propose to Goldman Sachs.

"They just have more to offer you

below the bottom line.

Now that they're legal people,

with rights we can define,

we must protect their interests

and court them royally,

admire their portfolios

and treat them daintily.

"For they, my boy, make no mistake,

are fickle as young girls.

They need our constant blandishments,

tax breaks instead of pearls.

Don't raise your voice in anger, no,

nor question what they do,

or overseas they'll relocate

and leave you feeling screwed."

I took to heart my father's words,

I studied contract law in school,

eschewed both kids and wife.

I fell in love with many firms,

joined the Grand Old Party,

but finally found both God and love,

wed to Hobby Lobby.

Mike Orlock is a retired teacher of high school English and social studies.

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